Damaged
by dmnq8
Summary: One is never beyond redemption, no matter how damaged he is. - Kiriban prize for Greyrocks. SasuNaru. Disclaimer in my profile.
1. Chapter 1

****A/N: This is **Greyrocks**'s Kiriban prize. She, along with one other, won the 22,222 kiriban on my Deviantart page. **Greyrocks,** if you're reading (I hope you are) the fic originally slated to go to you suffered some kind of freak accident and died. I tried to save it. Tried to re-write it, but the injuries it suffered from my research were too great. It died in my head and I had to let it go. It's a long, harrowing tale, but I'm very sorry. There really was nothing I could do. **  
**

I've never lost a fic before.**  
**

Enter my Muse. Yes, I have one and he is...beyond words. He mentioned an idea to me, at my request. _Saved _me, because I was in full panic mode. This is what grew from his idea. It's not actually anything _like_ his idea, and it's not fluff, as your fic was supposed to be, but it is SasuNaru. And in deference to the fact that I promised this ages ago, and failed to deliver what was agreed upon, it will be a few chapters. Not many. I hope you're all right with this not being fluff.

Regarding this fic, I've taken liberties with how social institutions work and twisted them to suit my needs and the setting of the story.

* * *

**Damaged**

The principal's office was a tiny cubicle. It was further cramped by an assortment of knickknacks Itachi associated with scholars and old people. Dusty books. Piles of files and papers. Framed newspaper clippings that were yellow with age and dated from before he'd been born. And pipes. Dozens of different kinds of tobacco pipes, many of which looked custom made. The one narrow window set in the far wall was filthy. The sunlight that managed to penetrate it was muted to a grayishness that put him in mind of graveyards. The man droning on and on behind the cluttered desk was certainly ancient enough to begin thinking of funeral plots.

Working a silver coin over and over the knuckles of one hand, Itachi fought the urge to yawn. A discreet glance at his watch showed that he'd been sitting there for close to an hour. He tried to focus on what was being said.

"As you know, the rules of this country are rather strict," Principal Sarutobi said. "Failure to graduate means immediate and mandatory recruitment into the Academy, where your brother will serve for ten years. He has been held back twice, once in middle school and now this year. He is failing every subject most spectacularly. His attendance is a joke, and when he does show up at school, I can be assured of at least three students being bloodied, and significant property damage. By all rights, your brother should have been put in juvenile detention a long time ago."

"Juvie's for retards," Itachi said. He could not be more bored if he tried. "Sasuke's no retard."

Sarutobi harrumphed in displeasure. "Juvenile detention is indeed where most mentally impaired children are sent, but your brother qualifies; he's troubled."

"If he qualified, he'd _be_ there. He was shrinked at your orders five years ago. Passed with flying colors."

"_He is troubled_," Sarutobi pressed relentlessly, "And juvenile detention is where people as troubled as your brother belong. He is a menace. I have taken the liberty of contacting the director there. Your brother will be assessed by him the following week, whereupon I have every expectation that he will be admitted."

That got Itachi's attention. "They can't take him against my will."

"He's a minor. Rest assured, your authority is not as absolute as you think."

"He'll be eighteen next month, they can't keep him past then, so he'd be stuck in there a few weeks at most, after which he'll come back home."

"Ah, but you see those who are admitted to the detention center are then _their_ responsibility. If it is deemed that your brother is unfit to be released to society, he will be handed over to Greenbud. And you and I both know that the likelihood of him being released from there is very slim."

Itachi did know. Greenbud was prison in all but name. Ostensibly, it was a mental institution for the criminally insane, but all sorts of shit was purported to take place there that was never proven. Medical experiments, torture… "He's not going to Greenbud."

"He will if he gets admitted to juvie."

Their eyes met and held for several moments. And understanding passed between them. "What does he have to do? Pass this year?" Itachi asked.

"This year is all but done. There are ten days of school left, your brother won't be passing. He can repeat the year in the fall…provided we accept him."

"How are you going to do that if, as you're so happy to point out, he'll be taken off to juvie next week?"

"Yes, well. If your brother consents to community service, and begins immediately, he will be accepted for the fall term. I can have his assessment for juvie canceled if he performs well."

"Let me get this straight. If Sasuke does community service he won't be taken to juvie? That's it?"

"Provided he performs without missing a day or cutting his hours, yes. But this is his last chance. After this, even if he doesn't go to juvie, he will still face the Academy if he fails high school."

The Academy was only marginally better than Greenbud. It was a military institution. There, the recruits had their violent impulses re-directed so that they became killing machines. Itachi clenched his jaw, thinking of Sasuke's persistent aversion to any kind of authority. The Academy would kill him, plain and simple. They did not brook disobedience. "Fine. How long's the community shit?"

"Five hundred hours. Twelve hours a day."

"And you'll take him in the fall if he does that?"

Sarutobi pushed a sheet of paper across his desk and laid an old-fashioned quill on top. "You'd have to sign this consent form. It states that Sasuke will do the community service, and that any failure on his part will result in immediate assessment by the Juvenile Detention Center of Konoha."

Itachi took the form and scanned it. "And if I don't sign this, you won't take him next year, and either the Academy or juvie gets him, right?"

"If we won't take him, and juvie doesn't get him, the Academy will snatch him up, correct."

"Where's the service?"

"Happy Time Home."

"I'm sure Sasuke will _love_ that." Itachi signed his name with a grimace. "There. Cancel that assessment with the director. He'll do his service and be back next fall."

* * *

Sasuke glanced at his door when the knob jiggled, then went back to staring at the ceiling. He sat bolt upright when the door was suddenly kicked open. The lock shattered completely, and the door itself rebounded off the wall. "What the fuck-!"

Itachi strolled inside, went directly to the CD player, picked it up, and threw it out the open window. The music that had been blaring dwindled as the device dropped ten stories. There was a distant crash.

Sasuke slowly got off the bed. Went to the window. Looked out. There was a small crowd around what was left of his player. He turned and stared at Itachi.

The fight was brief; Sasuke threw a single punch that Itachi caught. His other hand came around with a switchblade in it, but Itachi caught that too, and mercilessly kicked him in the groin. Sasuke wilted to the floor on a string of breathless curses, holding himself.

Itachi flicked the blade closed and dropped it into his back pocket. "Now that I've got your attention-"

"Go to hell," Sasuke wheezed.

"-suppose I tell you how I had to spend my afternoon, when I could have spent it studying. Your principal had quite a bit to say."

Sasuke crawled to the foot of his bed and climbed on as Itachi outlined the situation. "Fuck that. And fuck you, I'm not doing shit."

"It's the Academy or juvie, take your pick. Academy, you won't see home for ten years. Juvie, and you'll be Greenbud's newest bitch in a month. You'll see home never."

"Right, like home is such a great place," Sasuke muttered.

Itachi studied the glowering features a moment. "I try, all right? I'm working my ass off trying to make ends meet, studying, putting food in your mouth and clothes on your back…I can't make you go to school, or choose the right thing to do here on top of that."

"Yeah, yeah, you're a saint. I get it."

"Christ, what the hell do you _want_ from me?"

"Nothing." Sasuke got up and yanked a duffel from the back of his closet.

It wasn't the first time his brother had left home for awhile. Sometimes he'd be gone a night or two, a week at most. He always came crawling back when he'd run out of funds or was tired of fending for himself. Itachi watched the angry packing until Sasuke swung for the door. "Don't come back."

Sasuke was halfway down the hall, but he heard just the same. He turned and marched back to his room, stomach knotted hard. "I knew it. I knew you hated me as much as I hate you!"

Itachi shook his head wearily, before walking to the window and leaning his forearms on it. "Hate's got nothing to do with it. I don't hate you. I hate what you do, how you act, but I don't hate you, much as you'd like that. But I'm at my wits end. I don't know how to help you. I don't want you to go to the Academy or end up in Greenbud, but you don't seem to care. So if you're leaving just stay gone this time. You'll be legal soon, so you can do whatever in hell you want. Maybe if you're not here you'll be happier. I'll be worried sick, but if you're happy, finally happy, then I guess I can live with it. Least Sarutobi won't be able to send anyone to collect you. And who knows, maybe you'll be able to stay ahead of the authorities and out of juvie _and_ the Academy. I'm done fighting you." He straightened up and left a silent Sasuke standing in the doorway.

Sasuke stood where he was for a long time. Finally, his eyes fell on the form his brother had left on his desk. Dropping the duffel from his shoulder, he went to it, picked it up, and tore it to shreds.

* * *

Of the three group homes in Konoha, Happy Time Home was the largest. Supposedly it had the best funding and facilities, but even so it was a ramshackle one-story building with a dead tree in the yard and yellow grass bordering the broken walk. Litter dotted the grass here and there, and an old, beat-up tire swing hung from one of the tree's dead branches. It twisted slowly in the hot breeze, on its gray and fraying rope, as if trying to get away from the place.

A lopsided sign, obviously handmade, hung above the faded red door with the facility's name in dripping blue paint. Faces had been drawn on this sign. Judging by the name Happy Time, one could assume that the stretched grins and round eyes on the faces were meant to express wild happiness. To Sasuke, those faces looked terrified in the extreme. That pleased him. If this was a place like Greenbud, where pain was served with the morning applesauce, then he'd do his time gladly.

* * *

There was no bell. The cracked lintel had several hand-crafted birds dangling from it by colorful yarn, and the door frame had sun-bleached flowers running along it, but there was no bell. Sasuke pounded the door with his fist.

A girl answered. He judged her to be around his age. She was slender, with black hair and pale eyes that were kind and smiling as she asked if she could help him. Sasuke hated her on sight.

Behind her, he saw several children of indeterminate ages running around, and a youngish man coming from a back room to investigate their visitor. The man put a hand on the girl's shoulder, and she stepped aside. "Yes?" the man asked. He didn't seem aggressive or authoritative in anyway, but his eyes were steady on Sasuke's face.

Sasuke wordlessly held up his form.

The man took it with a frown, and squinted through the many strips of Scotch tape holding it together. He read, raised eyes that were cool and flat to Sasuke, and said, "Come with me."

-oOo-

The interior of the home was as shabby as the exterior. Though colorful, the walls were faded with age, and peeling. There were roaches scurrying just as hard as the children were, and an overall sense of closeness to the atmosphere that spoke of too many bodies crammed inside too little space. As he passed from one small room to another, Sasuke noticed the children all stopping to look at him. One little girl whispered to another that he looked too young to adopt anyone.

He was led to an office so small that he didn't bother entering. The man introduced himself as Iruka and squeezed between the edge of his desk and one wall in order to sit. "There are forms you'll need to sign," he said. "You'll need to define the nature of your service, choose a program, your hours…"

Slouched against the doorway, Sasuke had been picking his nails. He looked up at hearing all this. "What?"

Iruka tapped three different forms he'd laid side by side on his desk. "This is a list of services that can be performed here. This one," his hand moved to the middle form, "lists the programs we need volunteers for. And this form here shows available time brackets." He arched a brow at Sasuke. "Tell me if I'm going to fast, buddy. Do I need to repeat myself?"

The look he gave was one Sasuke recognized. Apparently Iruka had read his form, looked Sasuke over, and decided he was trouble. That was fine with him; he _was _trouble. What he didn't like was being spoken to as if he were an idiot. "Maybe just one more time," he drawled.

Iruka sat back in his chair and folded his arms.

The forms, once he'd snatched them off the desk, were just as they'd been explained. The services were straight-forward enough: construction, cooking, repairs, gardening, or social. The programs were likewise self-explanatory. He could choose from one-on-one, tutoring, nurturing, or medical. He assumed the medical was for med students interning over at the hospital. As he understood it, there were community rotations there involving time at group homes, homes for the elderly, and shelters.

He waved the papers toward Iruka. "Programs and Services are redundant. I don't see how choosing something from one form will allow me time to do anything from the other form."

A tight smirk tugged the corners of Iruka's mouth. "Astute of you. However, if you'd bothered to look at the Hours form, you'd see that volunteers here can divide their time. Seeing as your sentence states twelve hours a day, I thought I'd give you the courtesy of choosing how to divide your time."

_Oh_.

Sasuke studied the forms again. He hated physical exertion of any kind, so that left out the majority of the services. He didn't cook either. "What's social?"

"Taking the kids on field trips, mostly. Doing arts and crafts, or playing games sometimes."

_Fuck_ _that_. "Do I have to choose something from each form?"

"It's advisable. Long shifts like yours can get monotonous when spent on a single task."

_I'm sure you care. _Maybe he could decide which places the kids went. If that was the case, he'd have leave to take them to the arcade. That had possibilities. He checked the box next to social, and moved to the next form.

Tutoring was definitely out. One-on-one sounded like an express ticket to hell, and he wouldn't qualify for medical. "The hell's nurturing about?"

Iruka's jaw flexed. "Nothing you'd be interested in." When Sasuke held his stare, he went on. "Basically, we set you up with some of our special needs residents. You're responsible for all their care. Teaching, food, physical, and most importantly, counseling. If you choose the night shift, you'll also be sleeping with them. We limit the number of children to three per volunteer. You can pick the ages. I should also mention that you're allowed to choose more than one thing from each form."

Sasuke considered that carefully. If he was going to be stuck here for half the bleeding day, he wanted it to suck as little as possible, _if_ that were possible. He reconsidered repairs and gardening, but he couldn't fix shit, and he might last an hour with the plants before he decided death was preferable. Hating his brother intensely for signing him up for this shit, he checked the box next to one-on-one. The fewer snotty noses he had to wipe, the better. He looked over the hours briefly, and selected a time bracket.

Iruka took the forms and glanced at them. "Ten a.m. to ten p.m.?" He looked at Sasuke's mangled form again. "That'll give you 41 days of 12 hours, and a single day of six. You can serve those six hours now, actually," he said after he'd consulted his watch. He turned to his dusty computer and tapped some keys. A few moments later the printer in the corner shuddered and kicked to life. A single sheet of paper inched out of it. This was handed to Sasuke.

It was a calendar for the next month, with the field trips marked every week. "Three times a _week_?" Sasuke squawked.

Iruka nodded. "You'll be required to sign into this ledger every time you come, and sign out again before you leave." He turned a huge ledger toward Sasuke and slapped a pen on it.

Sasuke signed, noted the time, and added that too.

"Right. Since you've chosen social, whoever your one-on-one is will be tagging along. Nice overlap there. Time to pick your child." Iruka maneuvered around his desk again and led the way out to the main room.

-oOo-

It seemed the residents knew the drill. The children were already lined up in three long rows, in size order. Some toddlers sat in the very front row, their hands held by slightly older children. Sasuke counted close to a hundred residents. He was surprised to see that the back row held quite a few who had to be close to their teens. The oldest one looked to be thirteen or so. His eyes skipped along this back row; an older child would likely be able to feed itself and use the bathroom.

He didn't know what made him look past the assembled kids, but there, in a back corner of the room, a tall kid lounged against the wall. He was half-hidden in the shadows cast by the dim lighting in the room, and clad in dark clothes, but Sasuke judged him to be his age or thereabouts. He'd seen the girl who'd answered the door standing to one side of the kids, and correctly pegged her as another volunteer. Perhaps this kid was one as well…he was certainly older than any of the children, and he wasn't in line.

The dark-haired volunteer saw where Sasuke was looking though, and smiled at the kid in the corner. "Naruto? Come. Get in line so we can see you."

It could not have been more obvious by the grudging and sullen movement the kid was goaded into that he did not want to be seen. He shuffled into the light with his arms tightly crossed and his brows lowered into a stern V of resentment. The blue eyes were daggers to Sasuke's face.

Sasuke felt a smile quirk up one corner of his mouth; his insides lurched in response to the fuming animosity on that face. It was like seeing the embodiment of his own feelings, his hate and rage personified, and it gladdened him as nothing else about this place had.

_Hells yeah, now _that's_ what I'm talking about. _He lifted a hand to point at the blue-eyed kid. "Him."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Naruto almost looked behind himself to see who was being pointed at, but the kid was looking right at him. "Him," he said again, in a firmer voice. "He's the one I want. Him, right there."

There was a collective _ahh_ from the other children, then silence. The kid who'd chosen him didn't seem to notice. Naruto did, though. He never took his eyes off the kid, but he was aware of the stares coming his way.

From the corner of his eyes, he saw Iruka and Hinata beaming at him, before exchanging an emotional glance. He knew what they were thinking. Volunteers never chose him. Prospective parents never chose him. No one ever chose him, so this was a positive turn of events. He should therefore be happy.

Whatever.

Naruto watched as the kid was handed a clipboard of his own. He knew, from having watched countless other volunteers over the years, that it was full of questions aimed at the older residents of the home. In other words, people like him. Iruka explained to the kid how he was to ask Naruto the questions, note the answers, then formulate a plan of action to help his charge for the duration of his service in the home. The kid looked at the clipboard, skimmed the contents, then looked up at him again. Naruto looked back. The other kids and Hinata were staring at them both.

"Introduce yourself," Iruka muttered at the kid.

"Sasuke," the kid said. This was accompanied by a toss of his blue bangs.

Naruto glanced at Iruka as if to say, _Are you kidding me?_

Iruka caught the look, and clapped his hands together briskly. The awkward tension in the room was broken as he spoke to Sasuke in a tone of forced cheer. "Right, well. That's Naruto you've chosen. I'm sure you'll want to get started on those questions right away. I think the backyard will be quietest. The children are about to have afternoon snack, so-"

Naruto watched as this Sasuke tuned out Iruka's words and walked toward him. He was tall and lanky, able to look him in the eye. "Lead the way," Sasuke said.

He didn't budge. Instead, Naruto made a point of letting his eyes rove up and down Sasuke's body. _I'm not one of the babies here who hop whenever some volunteer says jump_, the look said. Oddly enough, Sasuke seemed to interpret the once-over correctly, and gave a tight smile in response.

* * *

The backyard was a large stretch of land, Sasuke saw. A tall wooden fence surrounded it. The grass was just as dead as in the front yard, but there was a trampoline, a bouncy castle, and a jungle gym. Naruto walked the entire length of the yard, to where a lone tree of gigantic proportions stood in a back corner, at the juncture where two lengths of the fence met. Close to, Sasuke could see sawed off wooden planks nailed to the trunk in a crude ladder. Naruto scrambled up nimbly, and disappeared in the leaves. After looking around and putting the clipboard in his teeth, Sasuke clumsily followed suit.

-oOo-

There was a sprawling tree house hidden in the branches. Naruto was parked on the floor, his back against one wall, in the largest room. Waiting for him. Sasuke dropped down across from him and spat the clipboard onto the floor. "Dude," he gasped. "I _hate_ climbing and shit."

Naruto said nothing. Only watched him from unblinking eyes.

Sasuke stared right back. He studied the blond spikes, the black hoodie, and dark blue jeans. Rundown sneakers finished off the look. He approved. "You going to talk or just stare at me all night?"

More silence.

Sasuke picked up the clipboard. The questions were lame as hell, but he had to crack the fucker somehow if they were to have any fun. "Okay, uh…what do you want to get out of our partnership?" He took up the pen secured in the clipboard and prepared to write.

Naruto's eyes moved down to the clipboard, then back to Sasuke's face. He finally looked away, to where late afternoon light gilded the leaves outside the tree house's window.

_Oh, I can do angst better than you, bitch, _Sasuke thought. He leaned back against the wall opposite Naruto, and adopted his position of one bent knee. He wouldn't say another fucking thing unless this jerk spoke first.

The children had apparently finished their snack, and had been turned loose in the yard by the time Naruto did speak. His voice was deep, deeper than Sasuke would have expected. He spoke while still looking out the window. "Why'd you choose me?"

Sasuke shrugged. "Seemed like the person I could relate to most."

That had the blond head turning enough to regard him with an eye. Caught in a shaft of slanting sunlight as it was, the eye looked green. "Relate how?"

"Dunno, man. Was thinking we could hang. You down?"

"What?" Naruto turned to look at him properly.

"Are you game."

Naruto was a few minutes answering. "You want to…be...friends?"

_Great. A retard. _Sasuke was rethinking his choice in residents, but shrugged again in reply. Let the idiot make of it what he would. He'd ask Iruka if he could switch. Naruto was staring at him at him again.

When the silence stretched out, Naruto nodded at the clipboard. "I'm supposed to answer that I hope to get valuable lessons on life and insight to myself from this partnership."

Sasuke snorted. Then he squinted at Naruto. _Maybe not a complete retard. _"What do you really hope to get?"

"I don't know," Naruto said carefully. His eyes were still thoughtful on Sasuke's face. "Never been chosen before."

"Serious?"

"Yeah. What do _you_ hope to get? From me?"

"A ticket to an easy ride with this garbage." He scribbled Naruto's first answer on the questionnaire.

"What garbage?"

"Being here? What, you think I willingly signed up for this?"

"Didn't you?"

"Please." Sasuke looked over the remaining questions. When he glanced up to ask one of them, he saw the frown of puzzlement on Naruto's face. "What?"

"You don't want to be here."

"Yeah, well, from the looks of you, you don't either."

"I don't have a choice. And you're wrong."

"I don't have a choice either. How'm I wrong?"

"Forget it." Naruto turned back to the window.

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Pussy."

Naruto turned his head with stunning slowness this time, giving Sasuke that blue dagger look again. "You think you know me? That you got me figured out?"

"I don't give a fuck _what_ you're about. We got a chance to have some fun here and you're shitting on it." He stood to brave the ladder again.

"Fun? _Fun? _You have a home to go to once you're done whatever criminal sentence this is for you. I've been stuck here my whole life, watching everyone else get adopted or chosen by volunteers, only to be told now that I'll have to leave in four months, when I turn eighteen. Where's the fun in that?"

"_I'm_ stuck coming here or risk being Jack Nicholson-ed in Greenbud," Sasuke retorted, as he spun around. "That, or sucked into Ninja 'R' Us at the Academy. _Anything's_ more fun than that."

"But you have a home."

"And you get to chill here with no one telling you what to do!"

"Is that what you think it's like here? Being an orphan _sucks_!"

They glared at each other, breathing heavily, until Naruto moodily looked at the floor. Sasuke threw the clipboard down and kicked it. "Look," he grated. "This sitch blows, but I figure we can at least make it bearable for each other."

"Yeah? Spare me. I've seen your type. You're forced to come here for whatever reason, pretend to be helping or doing your service, then you skip out first chance you get. Let's just cut to the chase; leave now and find somewhere else to have your fun. I'm not your charity case."

Sasuke watched as Naruto leapt up suddenly and swung right out the window and into the leaves. There was a moment of shock for him, but only a moment. "You fucking _fuck_!" he screamed after him.

* * *

Naruto banged into the kitchen through the backdoor, and nearly collided with someone.

"Whoa," Iruka said as he sidestepped. "Done so soon?"

Naruto rounded on him and leveled a finger toward the backyard. "I hate that kid. I _hate_ him. He's a fucking asshole."

Iruka smiled.

"The fuck are you laughing at!"

"You," Iruka said gently. He sipped from a glass of iced tea that Naruto hadn't noticed in his hand. "You're scared."

Naruto turned his back, raising his hands in the air, and shook his head. "No. No, you don't get to shrink me today. You may be the director, and a counselor, but you-"

"Seventeen years here, Naruto. And in walks a thug off the street and chooses you first thing."

"That _punk_-"

"Chose _you_. It's scary, I know. How many years have you dreamed of being chosen? For anything?" When Naruto didn't answer, Iruka nodded. "All your life. And it's never happened. You've given up. Gave up a long time ago. Stopped pretending to be happy whenever visitors or volunteers came by in the hopes they'd choose you. Just gave up and gave in to hating everyone. _And he chose you_." He sipped again. "What'd he say to you to make you hate him?"

Naruto had to swallow before he could answer. "That…he thought we could have fun."

Iruka was glad Naruto's back was to him. If the kid saw the sudden tears that flooded his eyes just then, he'd tease him for a week. But he set his glass on the table and walked up behind him to squeeze Naruto's shoulder. He was able to feel the violent tremors in that lean body, and his tears spilled over. "There, see? This has been a long time coming. He could turn out to be a friend. It's never too late to hope, Naruto. I've always said that. It's never too late."

"But I'm leaving here soon."

The scratchy quality of Naruto's voice, and the increase in his tremors, caused Iruka to put his other hand on Naruto's other shoulder. "And he's here now. Give him a chance, Naruto. He might surprise you. Might surprise both of us."

* * *

Sasuke was trying to cram every slur and curse he knew onto the lines the questionnaire allocated to his plan of action. Naruto scared the shit out of him by vaulting into the room through the same window he'd flown out of. He landed with a _thud_.

Naruto eyed the blade that appeared in Sasuke's hand, but spoke before his nerve could fail him. "Okay. Let's try this again. Can we start over?"

It was on the tip of Sasuke's tongue to tell him to fuck himself. It was, and Naruto's belligerent tone and challenging stare said he didn't particularly _want_ to try again. Sasuke spent several moments fantasizing about burying the knife in Naruto's eye socket.

He closed the blade instead. "Whatever."

Naruto relaxed a bit and rubbed his sweating palms over his thighs. "Surprised you didn't leave."

Sasuke looked at his watch. "Got five more hours in this hellhole." He scribbled a final epithet so hard that the paper ripped, then tossed the clipboard to Naruto. He waited until Naruto glanced over his handiwork and met his eyes again. "Well, what do you think? An accurate assessment of your character?"

Naruto set the clipboard aside. "What'd you mean about having fun?"

Sasuke studied him a moment. Naruto didn't seem upset about the insults. He shrugged. "Exactly what it sounds like. You and me, it could be sweet."

"Like?"

"Dude, chill. I'm not about to take you to the park or the rink, so quit worrying."

Naruto deflated a bit. He wouldn't have minded going to the rink. He'd only been once, and that was years ago. "What _do_ you like to do, then?"

"What's with the inquisition of a sudden?" When Naruto only blinked at him, he snorted. Seeking to impress, he said, "My fun ain't exactly legal. Can't go blabbing about it around here."

"I won't tell." Naruto's eyes were wide now, and his voice had dropped to a whisper. "I promise."

"I don't know. Maybe we should stick to you. What do you like doing in this shitty place?"

"Me? Nothing. I hang out here."

"In this tree house?"

"Yeah."

"That sucks."

"I built it."

"Still sucks."

"It's my favorite place."

"_You_ suck."

Naruto frowned, then looked down. "You don't have to be a jerk, you know."

"Aw, I hurt your wittle feewings? What, you got a favorite food and a favorite color too? Are you seriously that lame?" Sasuke sniggered.

"There aren't a lot of things to do here," Naruto snapped. "I _built_ this tree house. What can _you_ do, besides mouth off and act like a badass you're probably not? If you're so fucking cool, _bring_ _it_."

For a few tense moments, they sat glaring at each other much as they had before. Then Sasuke gave a grudging smile. "Better. S'long as you don't act like a pussy, we'll get along great. I'll do my time with no fuss, and you'll get to do shit besides jerk off up here."

"What the-! I never said I-"

"Now." Sasuke reached for the clipboard and picked up the pen. "In order to have the most freedom, I want that jackass Iruka off my back. He'll cramp my style, I can tell, so it's probably best if I actually do this stupid thing. How do you feel about your time here so far?"

Nonplussed by this sudden change in their conversation, Naruto stammered. "Um. I hate it."

Sasuke nodded. "And if you could change something about your circumstances, what would it be? How would you go about it?"

Naruto answered this too, his anger fading now that he wasn't being attacked anymore. The questionnaire was a full three pages long. Sasuke asked every question on it without once looking at the clipboard or writing anything down. He only held it. When Naruto asked if he planned on recording his answers, Sasuke only waved an impatient hand and moved to the next question.

"Last one. How would you like me to help you?" Sasuke said. By now evening had fallen.

"I don't know," Naruto shrugged. "I mean, I don't know anything about you."

"So ask." Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"All right…do you have family?"

"A brother."

"What's he like?"

"An asshole."

"Oh. What about parents? Are they-"

"That's enough Q&A." Sasuke got to his feet. "I can't sit here another second. I'll tell Iruka my extra hours have to be done some other time." He climbed awkwardly down the plank ladder.

Naruto left from the window again and landed in front of Sasuke just as he made it to the ground. "Is it me?" he asked once Sasuke had stopped cursing in fright. "If it's me-"

"Would you please _shut up_? Fuck, if I'd known you were going to talk me into a stupor I wouldn't have bitched about your silence. Outta my way."

"What time will you be here tomorrow?" Naruto asked. He kept pace as Sasuke almost ran to the house. "Do we have a field trip? Will you-"

Sasuke whirled on him. "I get it, okay? You pathetic little retard, I _get_ it. I get that you've never been chosen, so you're having some kind of spaz attack now, but I swear to God, if you don't get out of my ass I will choose someone else. Not another word. We clear on that?"

Naruto's lips were sealed. He nodded.

"Good. Don't make me regret this anymore than I already do."

There was a flash of anger in those blue eyes, and his cheeks went a dull red, but Naruto said nothing. Sasuke grinned. _Might be hope for the idiot yet._

* * *

Inside, Iruka looked up from washing a sink full of dishes. Listened while drying his hands on a dish towel, as Sasuke said he'd serve his remaining hours another time. Went to his office to retrieve another questionnaire, and handed it over when Sasuke said the one he'd had suffered an accident. Sasuke leaned against the narrow counter and began filling in Naruto's answers.

Iruka watched, frowned in Naruto's direction, then moved to see what was being written. He read over Sasuke's shoulder as the lines were filled in quickly and concisely.

Thirty minutes later, Sasuke shoved the clipboard at Iruka and left. No goodbye, no nothing. He and Naruto heard Hinata saying she'd see him tomorrow, to which there was no reply. The front door slammed shut.

Iruka went to his office and saw that Sasuke had even remembered to sign out. He'd logged three hours today. Looking at the clipboard again, he slowly sat on the edge of his desk.

Naruto had followed him as far as the doorway. "What does it say?"

"When asked what your greatest wish was for your future, did you say that it was to be anything but useless?"

"Um…yeah, I guess?"

"Then I guess these are really your answers, and not things he made up. Funny. He was able to recall them without asking you. Did he seem strange to you?"

"Besides being the biggest dick this side of Hell?"

Iruka shook his head. "I don't know. Something is off about him."

"Off how?"

"Can't put my finger on it…but listen to what his assessment of you is. 'Naruto has a debilitating sense of insecurity no doubt exacerbated by the lack of age-appropriate residents in the home, and his constant rejection by visitors to same. He protects himself with anger, and hides his lack of self-esteem behind a façade of indifference. Proposed plan of action is prolonged contact, and engagement in activities suitable for young adults. Outings to venues that cater to his natural athleticism, and obvious love of sports. Though a solitary creature, it is my belief that Naruto would open up a lot more if given the kind of attention he craves.'"

Iruka read this several more times in silence. It was no more believable on the tenth reading than it was on the first.

"Wow," Naruto managed after a while. "That sounds nothing like him. I don't even understand all those words. Is...is any of it true, do you think? Do you think he assessed me right? I mean, I didn't even tell him I liked sports."

"I couldn't have done a better job myself," Iruka admitted. He finally set the clipboard behind him and looked up. "That assessment could have come from a licensed psychologist. Whoever he is, this Sasuke is far from as stupid as he would have us believe. That troubles me. And you say he isn't particularly pleasant. If you want, I will assign him someone else-"

"_No_. He chose me. He's mine."

Iruka gazed at him for a long time, but eventually nodded. "All right. I understand. But Naruto, I have to warn you. He was sent here as penance for delinquency. He's trouble, and strikes me as decidedly unstable. I don't want you getting hurt."

"I won't," Naruto said quickly, feeling his panic subside. He remembered the blade he'd seen in Sasuke's hand. "I mean I won't let him hurt me. I'll be careful. Just don't assign him to anyone else."

"I give you my word. But I'll be keeping an eye on him. The first field trip isn't until next week, so for the next few days he'll likely be spending his twelve hours with you. His negativity might get in the way after awhile."

"I can handle him. What time's he supposed to be here?"

"Ten." The look of determination and hope on Naruto's face was too much. "Look, I know I asked you to give him a chance…"

"I _promise_," Naruto promised. "I'll be careful."

"If he does _anything_-"

"I'll report it right away." At seeing the way Iruka picked up the clipboard again and shook his head at it, he went to him and placed his hand over the papers. Iruka looked up at him with troubled eyes. "I'm not going to let him hurt me or anyone else here. I swear."

-oOo-

Later, Iruka went out to the tree house in search of the original questionnaire, and found it in a corner of the structure's main room. It was covered in slurs and caustic writing that nonetheless confirmed his fears. The kind of mind that could write these things was not one he wanted around his kids.

First thing in the morning, he intended to call the contact numbers on Sasuke's form and find out exactly who he was.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Re-wrote this chapter 3 times. -.-

* * *

Chapter 3

There was a small round table in the kitchen nook that could sit one person comfortably. Sasuke arrived home that night to find his brother parked in this nook, with his books spread and overflowing the table. Itachi glanced up, did a double take, then gestured with his pen. "Thought you left?"

The books. Always those books. Sasuke stared at them. They were always there, day and night. A wave of guilt, shame, and loathing washed through him at the sight of Itachi buried in them, same as it always did.

"Sasuke?"

Itachi shook his head when Sasuke went to his room and slammed the door. Relieved though he was that his brother had apparently decided to come home, he didn't relish the aggravation that was bound to follow. The moods had gotten old a long time ago. Flipping a page, he resumed studying.

* * *

Naruto was up, bathed, and dressed by six. He spent the remaining time pacing the main room and staring at the wall clock.

Some of the children came up to him, the way they usually did, asking for piggyback rides, or to play hide-and-seek. He obliged, but a distracted Naruto wasn't fun. They left him alone. Hinata came to him at 9:30 and asked if he was sure he didn't want some breakfast. He declined yet again, and she also withdrew.

Thirty minutes to go. Naruto went to the window, scanned up and down the block, turned, went to the opposite wall, then came back and scanned again. And again. And again.

He couldn't get over it; he had one-on-one with a volunteer. His life at the home had been pretty uneventful to date. When he was small he'd had a lot of friends, he recalled. He'd always been the loudest and wildest of the bunch. As a result, he was always the one passed over for adoption. The few times a couple had deigned to sit with him, they'd always decided, upon learning of his problems, that he would be too much to handle. His friends had all either been placed, or adopted. Every time he made a new friend, that one was taken away too. He'd stopped getting close to the kids years ago. Now he was just another permanent fixture to the place, one the kids liked to have fun with on occasion. Like the trampoline in the backyard.

Sasuke had taken one look at him and chosen him.

He _still_ couldn't get over it. Remembering it, the way that finger had lifted to point at his face, the way those black eyes had bored into his own…the same secret thrill of surprise and excitement twisted in his belly. Each time he thought about it his breath did a little hitch. He'd hid it well, the happiness that shot through him at that moment. Then he'd almost ruined the whole thing by mouthing off to Sasuke and leaving him.

Naruto stopped pacing as last night came back to him.

He remembered every word. To be fair, Sasuke had deserved to be left. And he'd deserved to be insulted. Hell, he hadn't even insulted Sasuke. All he'd done was defend himself. Sasuke seemed to like it when he got angry, too. What kind of person liked pissing people off? _The kind who carries a switchblade in his pocket. _He hadn't forgotten that either. Or the way Sasuke seemed to think he was in charge.

_He can't be much older than I am, _Naruto thought. Which meant Sasuke wasn't the boss of anyone. Besides, if he had Sasuke pegged right, he planned on doing a bunch of things that would get them in trouble. Naruto wanted his share of the fun, real fun, not a room in juvie. He'd be having a talk with Sasuke, and not just to make sure the jerk understood that he wouldn't help him break the law. He'd let Sasuke own him last night. He might be an orphan, but he was no one's bitch, and that was for damn sure.

Only…if he told Sasuke all that, Sasuke might leave. And if he refused to go along with Sasuke's agenda, he might never leave the home except for field trips. No one ever chose social when they volunteered at the home. They hated taking a bunch of noisy, rowdy kids on field trips. And the field trips were always to babyish places, the better to cater to the largest age bracket of the home's residents. Naruto never had fun on field trips.

If Sasuke had meant any of what he'd said in the assessment he'd written, then he had a real shot at visiting some cool places. That Sasuke had even taken the time to notice the things he had about him suggested that _he_ was cool, despite being a world-class prick. No one ever noticed him, or the things he liked. No one cared, unless you considered Iruka and Hinata. And they didn't count. _I'll give him a chance. One chance, _Naruto decided. _Maybe he really will surprise me._

The clock.

Naruto spun to see that the minute hand was right on the twelve. It was ten.

For a moment he held his breath, trying to hear if someone was coming up the walk. Nothing. His eyes flicked to the window, but all he could see from where he stood was an empty soda can on the front lawn. From the corner of his eye he saw Iruka come to the main room's doorway. He was watching too, it seemed.

Naruto's eyes went back to the clock. Minute hand was on the nine now. The ten. Eleven. Sasuke didn't strike him as someone who'd be late. Not someone who could use the kind of language he had in his assessment.

The minute hand was one tick away from the twelve when someone's fist banged on the front door. The tension Naruto had been stiff with left him in a rush. He made it to the door in two strides, and yanked it open. His grin nearly split his face.

-oOo-

Sasuke rolled his eyes at this greeting.

Naruto's grin melted away. He stood aside while Sasuke sauntered over the threshold. Unlike the previous night, Sasuke was wearing a knapsack this time. A smell of soap lingered in his wake, and Naruto saw that the blue-tinted hair was still damp. _He's a rude asshole, but clean at least._ He shut the door and waited for Iruka to give Sasuke his schedule.

"I gave you the trip schedule yesterday," Iruka was saying to him. He held out another sheet for Sasuke, who reluctantly took it. "This is the indoor schedule. You can see arts and crafts and games are scheduled for the days you aren't doing field trips. Those sessions will be three hours each. There's one scheduled for today, actually. You can choose between crafts or games. Naruto can sit in on those, of course. Incidentally, I tried calling the numbers listed on your form. No one answered."

"House phone's disconnected," Sasuke said. "And my brother's at school."

"I see. Well, let me know what your plans are today, all right?"

"Whatevs."

Iruka nodded, before disappearing toward the back of the house. Sasuke looked at the calendar in his hand, wadded it up, and tossed it to a corner. He turned to Naruto. "So," he began. "I'm not sitting around here. You ready?"

"Yeah."

Sasuke eyed the black hoodie and jeans. "Gotta be 95 degrees out."

"I'm good."

_Suit yourself, _Sasuke thought. His eyes fell on the rundown sneakers Naruto was wearing. The soles actually flopped when he walked.

* * *

Outside, Sasuke led the way to a park about a mile away from the home. Naruto watched as several kids recognized Sasuke and ran away from the swings they'd been playing on. Sasuke sat on one. After a moment of thought, Naruto took the one beside him. "Thought you weren't going to take me to the park?" he said.

"We need to talk." Sasuke had his head down, body braced against the chains holding the swing, as he idly twisted back and forth.

Naruto, straddling his swing the way he was, put his forehead against the metal chain, already sweating. "What about?"

"I don't want you getting the wrong idea about the fun I mentioned."

"You already said the crap you do is illegal."

"Right. So I don't need you whining about it. I may be forced to do community service, but I don't plan on altering my lifestyle while I do it."

"Why _are_ you doing it?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Already told you. Juvie. Greenbud. Not my thing."

"I see." Naruto used his heels to push the swing from side to side, now leaning back against the other chain. "Actually I don't. Why do you care if you get assigned to Juvie or Greenbud? You seem like the kind of jerk who'd just escape. Run away."

Sasuke didn't answer that. "Look, all I need to know is if you'll go tattling."

"About what?"

"Whatever I do."

"Which is?"

Sasuke chewed his lip, head still down but now twisted to squint at Naruto in the sunlight. "Whatever. I. Do."

Naruto thought about it. "I don't see how whatever you do is supposed to be fun for me."

"Who said it would be? I'm stuck with your ass. Never said I planned to hold your hand and play hop scotch."

"Whatever _that_ is. And you're the one who went on and on about how we had a chance to have fun and how I was ruining it."

"God, that?" Sasuke groaned. "Dude, look around. You're out of that place. That should be enough fun for you. You can continue to get out, so long as you let me do my thing."

"Still waiting to hear what that is."

"Fuck you, are you down or not?"

Naruto didn't want to agree or disagree. He opted for silence and gave a one-shouldered shrug.

Sasuke shook his head. He noticed that Naruto had nothing on beneath his hoodie when the hem was used to mop his brow of sweat. "Tell you what. How about we get you a new wardrobe?"

"Don't need one."

"You're wearing the only clothes you own."

"So?"

Sasuke ran his eyes up and down Naruto's body, measuring him, before looking off toward the basketball court. Several teen boys were playing a heated game. "I want you to go to that redheaded kid, the one with the white tank top. Tell him your friend is hurt in the men's room. Get him to come with you."

"To the men's room? Why?"

"Just do it."

"No."

"You are one big fat hairy dripping pussy, you know that?"

"Why, because I don't want to jack some guy for his clothes? I'm not hurting anyone for you."

Sasuke just barely held in a curse. He put his head back, grit his teeth, and let out a muted scream between them. "It's not hurting them," he said when he could speak. "He'll give us his shit, watch. You want decent rags or not?"

"Not at the expense of-"

Sasuke waved a hand. "Fine. _Fine_. Look." He pointed to the bathrooms across the park. "I'm going in there. Bring that fuck in. If he doesn't simply hand over his clothes, we'll let him go. Deal?"

"Why the hell would he hand his clothes over?"

"You in or out?" When Naruto didn't answer Sasuke got off the swing and met the frowning blue eyes. "I can do my community service somewhere else. Leave you to those drooling kids and Iruka. Or I can do my 500 hours and take you out for a few minutes a day. Your choice." He walked off toward the park's bathrooms.

-oOo-

Left alone, Naruto weighed his options while watching the basketball game. He could participate in a crime and have someone's sweaty shirt, or…not.

Being in the backyard, even in his tree house, just wasn't the same as actually walking the streets and seeing the sights. Though he was the home's oldest resident, he still wasn't allowed off the premises unsupervised. Sometimes Iruka took him with him in the home's dilapidated station wagon when it was time to buy groceries, but even that wasn't the same. He was actually outside right now, on a beautiful day. Blue skies, fluffy clouds, warm breeze. He wanted that to continue. He was sure Sasuke _would_ drop him and his community service if he tattled about his activities, of that he had no doubt. All he had to do was lead some kid to the men's room. Sasuke had promised that no one would get hurt…

He let himself swing a few more minutes before getting up and making his way to the basketball court.

* * *

Thirty minutes later, Sasuke strolled in the direction of the game with his mouth open. He was in time to see Naruto intercept a pass, drive up the court, leap, and slam the ball through the net.

"Game!" someone yelled.

A crowd of people Sasuke had been vaguely aware of rushed the court now, slapping Naruto on the back and whistling. Naruto was beet red and drenched, but grinning back happily.

The very same redhead Sasuke had earmarked pushed his way to the center of the crowd and grabbed Naruto around the neck. "Good game. Next time wear something cooler, though. You look like you're about to have heat stroke."

"Got nothing else," Naruto panted.

A tall kid with hair down to his ass, ran to his bag and pulled out a spare T-shirt. He lobbed it over the heads in the crowd. "Here!"

Naruto caught it. "Thanks, Neji!"

Sasuke stared at 'Neji'. Long, tanned, muscular torso. Light eyes. He saw Neji part the crowd easily, to pull Naruto aside a moment. "So, I'll come by the home and visit," Sasuke heard him say. "My cousin works there, but I've never actually been." He gave an easy smile that the girls in the crowd nearly swooned over. Sasuke had a sudden urge to stab him.

Naruto seemed just as taken, though. He stammered out something, taking the shirt and holding it as he stared at it. Neji's hand sat entirely too possessively on Naruto's shoulder as he bent to say something else. A nervous giggle left Naruto.

Someone shouted for another game. Neji left Naruto to join in, sweaty torso gleaming and dark hair flying. Naruto looked up and noticed Sasuke for the first time. He came over slowly.

Sasuke was livid. "You couldn't just bring the guy to the men's room, oh no," he hissed. "Had to join in their game, make friends."

"Got a shirt anyway," Naruto tried to laugh. He ended up wincing instead.

Sasuke got a good look at him and checked the rest of his tirade. "Let's go." He turned and quickly began walking out of the park. He wanted to put distance between them and any bystanders before he checked Naruto over. That comment about heat stroke looked to be accurate.

* * *

Naruto had difficulty keeping up. Sasuke didn't stop until they'd reached the street. By then Naruto wheezing. He was turning to look for someplace to sit, when the sound of violent vomiting had him turning back around in time to catch a falling Naruto. Naruto was a lot heavier than he looked, though. They both went down.

"Serves you right," Sasuke griped. He turned Naruto onto his side. "Who the hell plays in their-"

Naruto passed out. He was only out for a few seconds, but when he woke, he was speaking gibberish. Sasuke slung him over his shoulders and ran.

-oOo-

When Naruto slit his eyes open, he found himself in the shadows of an alley, propped up behind a dumpster. Sasuke had his wrist in one hand, and was staring at his watch. "Thirsty," he croaked. His throat felt like it was coated with sand.

"Tachycardia," Sasuke muttered. "Dammit." He dropped Naruto's hand to rummage in his knapsack, and came out with a pen. Naruto felt one eyelid thumbed open, and the pen became a light that moved back and forth between both his eyes. "Pupils fixed and dilated." Sasuke pressed the back of one hand to Naruto's brow, frowning. "Temp 105 at _least_-"

Just then a sudden cramp had Naruto shouting.

"Where's it hurt?" Sasuke asked. "Hands? Feet? Stomach?"

"My stomach!" Naruto managed to roll to his side before he threw up, but this didn't alleviate the pain, which he now felt in both hands and feet as well. He threw up again, right in Sasuke's lap.

"_Fuck!_" Sasuke yelled. "Come here."

The next thing Naruto knew, he was being stripped of his hoodie and jeans. Even his socks and shoes. He was left to lie on the filthy pavement as Sasuke ran out the alley.

* * *

He had no idea how long he lay there, but by the time Sasuke came back with his knapsack bulging, Naruto's stomach was completely empty. He lay shivering in misery as Sasuke checked his pulse again. "What's my name?" he asked.

"Mmuuh," Naruto groaned.

"How many fingers is this?"

Naruto saw the blurry shape of Sasuke's hand and just shook his head. The action made him gag, but nothing came up.

"Okay. Okay. Stop moving, I got this."

Sasuke wasted no time. He dumped both bags of ice he'd gotten on Naruto's body and spread it around. Naruto didn't even complain. The IV kit had been harder to come by, but he had it out and hung on the side of the dumpster in record time. Naruto made no sound at all as the needle went into his arm. Done, he scooped up a handful of ice and put it directly on Naruto's face. He took a blanket he'd managed to find and spread it over him. It was thin, but would help keep the ice from melting too soon. Last, he took a packet of ibuprofen from a pocket in his knapsack and forced two pills in Naruto's mouth. A bottle of Gatorade served to wash them down. Naruto choked, but Sasuke forced him to drink the entire bottle in small swallows, before letting him lie down again.

The IV was nearly empty when someone else came running into the alley. Sasuke had his knife at the ready, but it was only Itachi. "Took you long enough," Sasuke spat. "He needs more fluids. You bring your bag?"

Itachi knelt and felt Naruto's pulse. "Kid needs the hospital. What the _fuck_, Sasuke."

"No. No hospital, Iruka would have my head. I'd be in Juvie an hour later."

"The fuck's Iruka? Who is _this_?" He spoke while fishing a digital thermometer out of his bag and putting it to Naruto's ear. "One oh three, Jesus."

"It was worse than that. Gimme the IV. You brought antipyretics?"

Itachi wordlessly handed over a small bottle and a syringe. He took down the used IV while Sasuke hooked up the new one and added the drugs. Sasuke then asked for the sphygmometer. Itachi had an electric one in his bag, and handed that over as well. "I'm the med student," he said as Sasuke slipped it over Naruto's arm. "I should be doing that."

Sasuke snorted. "I think he's stabilizing," he said as he read the results. He sat back on his heels and let out a sigh.

"So who is this? Some kid you jacked?"

"Just help me get him home."

"Explanation or I walk." He began packing the thermometer and used IV kit.

Sasuke talked as Itachi carried Naruto to the car and drove home.

* * *

This time Naruto woke on a bed he knew wasn't his own; he didn't have a bed. He had a moth-eaten blanket and a cot during winter, and his tree house in summer. The room he was in was air-conditioned and dark. It smelled like…Sasuke.

He was weak, but able to turn his head. He saw a clear bag of fluid hooked up to a needle in his arm, a pile of neatly folded shirts and jeans on a chair, and the most beautiful man he'd ever seen sitting in another chair, looking at him. "Welcome back," this man said.

Naruto tried to speak.

"Easy. You're recovering from a pretty serious case of heat stroke. Do you know your name?"

"Uzumaki. Naruto. Water, please."

A strong hand was slipped beneath his shoulders, and a straw placed at his lips. His mouth was dry as paper. The water was vaguely sweet, and so cool that he almost cried in relief. He drank greedily until it was pulled away.

"Not so fast." The man eased him back to the pillows. "You'll have all the water you can handle, but take it easy."

"Is this a hospital?"

"Nope. Sasuke's room. I'm his brother, Itachi. How you feeling?" The same penlight was shined into his eyes as Itachi peered into them.

"Okay, I guess. Weak."

Itachi nodded. "Sasuke's filled me in on what happened. You should be okay in another couple of hours-"

Naruto sat up suddenly, ignoring the dizziness that followed. "What time is it?" The sky outside the window was dark. "I have to get back."

"Seven-thirty. Relax. Sasuke called the home and told Iruka that you and he were hanging out here."

"Did he say I was sick? Was Iruka mad? Where _is_ Sasuke?"

"Said you guys were playing video games. No idea if he was mad or not. And Sasuke's out. Said you needed a few things."

"Me?" Naruto lay back down in confusion. Two cool fingers on his inner wrist measured his pulse. "I don't understand."

"And I have my boards to study for. Looks like you're doing much better. Sasuke should be back soon, he'll explain everything. I got soup on the stove. I'll bring it in a few minutes, okay? _Rest_." Itachi left.

-oOo-

Naruto let his eyes wander around the room. He couldn't see much, but the closet was open, and clothes were spilling out of it. The same was true for the dresser. A bookcase completely covered one wall. It was jammed full of books as thick as his arm, both vertically and horizontally. He saw another case, tall and thin. That one was full of CDs, but there was no CD player.

Finally, he took Itachi's advice and let his body relax. He stared up at the ceiling. Lights came and went from headlights in the street. Somewhere in the building a T.V was playing. he could hear recorded laughter every few seconds, and the sound soothed him.

He was suddenly very sleepy. Cool and comfortable and safe. "I'm in Sasuke's room," he whispered to himself. "Sasuke's _house_."

He'd never been in anyone's house before, and felt absurdly privileged to be in one now. It was what he dreamed about constantly. Having a home, a family. Someplace to put his things. Having _things_ to begin with. Stupid things, things he didn't need. A bathroom that didn't have a potty on the toilet for little kids, one that wasn't shared with a hundred other people. Sasuke had all that, it seemed, and even had a brother to share it with.

A feeling swelled in Naruto's chest, one he couldn't identify. He only knew that he wanted to stay in Sasuke's bed, in his room, in his house, forever.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

This time, when Sasuke walked in the door –struggling with several large shopping bags- Itachi was waiting for him. He ambushed him in the hall and leaned into his grill. "So," he hissed. He didn't want his voice carrying to Naruto. "You gave me the bare minimum on the way here, but how about you fill me in on your sudden change of heart?"

"Get out of my face."

"How'd you end up agreeing to the community service?" Itachi pressed. "How come you're practicing again? Who is this kid that he's important enough for you to want him clothed and–"

An elbow was thrown at Itachi, but Itachi saw it coming and slipped back. He followed on Sasuke's heels as his brother stalked toward his room. "What's happening to you, Sasuke?"

Sasuke slammed his door on the question, and leaned on it for good measure. He didn't relax until he heard Itachi go back to studying.

There was an understanding that existed between him and his brother. One that let him go about his business without interference, despite the fact that his brother knew full well most of what he did. Itachi didn't bug him unless he himself was bugged by someone on his brother's behalf. As was the case with Sarutobi. In return, Sasuke more or less obeyed the lax rules of the house…if one could call it obeying. The point was that he and Itachi existed under the same roof without actually interacting with each other. And that was the way he liked it. He kept his activities outside the house to make sure his brother would have no reason to get in his face. They exchanged a dozen words at most a year. For years.

So he couldn't fault Itachi for interrogating him. Well he could, but he understood where it was coming from; he'd gone and fucked up their dynamic. First by agreeing to the damned community service, and now by appearing to actually care about someone other than himself.

He stared at where Naruto lay sprawled in his bed. There was a cooling bowl of soup on the nightstand, and the half-empty IV bottle hanging from the lamp. When he'd first gotten him home, while Naruto had still been unconscious, he'd gone through his closets and drawers, dragging out clothes he never wore. He intended to give them to Naruto, along with the stuff he'd just bought, but why? Why did he care if some asshole had clothes on his back?

What _was_ wrong with him? Itachi had asked what was happening to him. He'd run from the question, from the plaintive and wondering sound of his brother's voice. From the feelings the question called up and the things it implied. But now he was shut in his room with the same things. He didn't know Naruto, didn't want to know him, and couldn't care less what happened to him, he told himself. So why was the ass in his bed, wearing his T-shirt, and causing him grief?

For several heart-stopping moments, Sasuke couldn't breathe. He felt guilt. Crushing, debilitating guilt and shame. And then he was over it, and moving to his bed.

* * *

Fingers snapping sharply above his nose brought Naruto around from the doze he'd fallen into. He'd scarcely opened his eyes before an ice-cold stethoscope slid beneath his shirt. Sasuke was hovering over him, lips in a tight line. Naruto pushed himself up straighter, but said nothing. He let Sasuke work, and sat silently as he timed his pulse, checked his temperature, and looked in his eyes. The stethoscope was thrown on the floor. The bowl of soup Itachi must have brought while he'd been out was thrust into his hands. "Eat." Sasuke ordered.

While he did, Sasuke left the room and came back with his black hoodie and the jeans he'd been wearing. They were clean and folded, he saw.

The soup was good. He wouldn't have minded another bowl, seeing as it was the only food he'd had all day, but he didn't dare ask. Sasuke looked ready to do murder.

"Take off my shit," Sasuke said. "Put back on your own clothes. And hurry up, I don't have all night. It's almost ten now. Iruka's probably having puppies."

Naruto reluctantly took off the clothes he'd been lent and donned his own.

-oOo-

Sasuke took his brother's car and drove them to the home. Once there, Naruto stood in disbelief as Sasuke informed Iruka that he wouldn't be coming back. He turned and was back in the car and driving away before either of them could respond.

Iruka looked at Naruto. "What happened?"

Naruto, who was watching the taillights dwindle down the street, said, "He saved my life today."

"What-!"

But Naruto moved around him and went to his tree house. He didn't like people seeing him cry.

* * *

The next day was Saturday. Sasuke spent the weekend out of the house, but when Monday rolled around, he was waiting outside principal Sarutobi's office before the old man showed up.

Sarutobi eyed him with a beady stare as he unlocked his office. "And to what do I owe this pleasure?" he said drily.

"I want off that community service."

Sarutobi took his time shuffling around his musty office. "I'm afraid that would necessitate me contacting the juvenile detention center."

"Only if I don't pass this year."

"I don't see how you can possibly hope to do that. You have failed or nearly failed every class, every year, of both high school and middle school. Rightfully, you belong in a special needs school. I have told your brother time and again to get a tutor for you, or to sign you up for the tutoring programs the school has after classes, but he insisted that you didn't need one. Sasuke," he said kindly, his face softening. "You have a severe learning disability, as all your teachers have said. There's no shame in asking for help. Next year, when you-"

Sasuke really thought he would have an aneurysm right then and there. That, or some kind of cardiac event. Granted, he'd expended no small amount of energy to ensure that he appeared to be mentally deficient, but to hear this dinosaur actually say that he had a learning disability was enough to choke him with rage. He listened to as much of Sarutobi's rambling assurances that even the most challenged person could rise above his shortcomings, before he decided enough was enough. "When are finals?"

"I beg your pardon?" Sarutobi hunted around for his tobacco, pipe in hand.

"Final exams. When are they?"

"Well now, let me see what you signed up for this year. Ah yes, here is your schedule. English, Social Studies, Computer Science…Physical Education is today. You have Creative Writing and Biology Essentials tomorrow. The others are spread throughout the rest of the week, but Math is two weeks from now, along with Science. I believe you're taking Genetics?"

Sasuke thought quickly. He was going to fail P.E and Math, that much he knew. "I can pass with two failed classes."

"That you can, but you're hardly likely to pass your other classes, not when you haven't done a single assignment all year, and have demonstrated that you know nothing of the work. Even if you did pass your finals, it's only part of your grade. You would need to attend summer school for all your classes, the entire summer, and then sit your finals in order to pass."

"I can pass my finals, old man. Give them to me right now and I'll pass them. I'm not doing summer school."

"Then you won't pass this year."

"I _can't_ do summer school. Give me an alternative. Any alternative."

Sarutobi sat back in his chair and studied him. "Where is all this sudden concern for your well-being coming from?"

"From my ass you son of a…just give me an alternative!"

"There is no alternative. Summer school, where you will be given all the assignments you missed this year. Condensed, of course, which is to say the workload will be nothing short of excruciating."

Sasuke fumed. Weighed the prospect of having another year of school forced down his throat against two months of summer school. "If I sign up for summer school, I'm off community service?"

"Yes."

"No juvie?"

"No."

"Sign me up."

Sarutobi had his secretary do it. He heard the old man call out to him that he had classes to get to, but Sasuke left the school.

* * *

Itachi walked in the apartment after his own classes to find the table in the kitchen nook occupied by Sasuke, who was poring over a textbook. His face was screwed up in a frown of straining concentration.

He had trouble masking his shock.

Years. He'd watched his brother slipping away from him for years, seen the pain and anguish he lived with. He couldn't help him. He knew that and accepted it by now, but this...to see Sasuke making an effort after so long... Itachi stood frozen for several moments, not quite daring to hope.

Under the guise of getting a glass of water, he was able to pass by Sasuke and peek at the textbook. Algebra. Beginning algebra, at that. Itachi briefly debated asking his brother what in hell was going on. He was afraid to. Afraid the changes he saw taking place would stop if he called attention to them. He'd been praying for his brother to come back for ten long years. Now that it seemed like he was, he would do nothing to jeopardize that.

Without a word, he went to the coffee table and took out his own books.

-oOo-

At the end of the week, Itachi received a call from the school saying that by some miracle, Sasuke had passed several final exams. Not only passed, but passed without a single wrong answer. Sarutobi went on to say that the teachers suspected Sasuke of cheating, but they went to the trouble of drawing up secondary exams, covering the same material and a little extra- which Sasuke also completed with unprecedented scores. He then told how Sasuke had signed himself up for summer school, and was set to begin the following Monday. "He'll be let off for two days in a couple of weeks in order to take his Math and Science finals," the old man enthused, "but should he complete summer school with the same outstanding grades he received on his finals, he will pass high school without the slightest problem."

Itachi had only just hung up with him when a knock sounded at the door. He glanced at where Sasuke was cursing under his breath at his math book, before going to see who it was.

It was some man with a scar across the bridge of his nose and a hip ponytail. Itachi looked him up and down. "Yeah?"

"Is this the Uchiha residence?"

"Who wants to know?"

"I'm Umino Iruka." A brown hand was extended, which Itachi didn't touch. "With Happy Time Home?"

Oh. "Yeah, my brother got out of that."

"I know. I was wondering if I could speak to him anyway? If he's home?"

Itachi didn't want anyone meddling in their lives, but _something_ had caused the change he saw in Sasuke, and it could have been the home. He looked over his shoulder in question. Sasuke was looking at him. He gave a shrug and went back to his algebra; Itachi opened the door wider.

Iruka led with a smile that Sasuke ignored. "I'm not on community service anymore," he said without looking up from his book.

"I know." The kitchen nook opened onto the tiny living room. Iruka perched on the back of the couch, looking at Sasuke's bent head. "Naruto sent me to ask if you'd consider coming back."

Sasuke's pencil stopped moving in his notebook, though his head remained bent. "He okay?"

"Why wouldn't he be?"

"Whatever. And no."

"He misses you."

"He said that?"

"I can tell. He doesn't come out of the tree house often, and he was very excited to be chosen by you. Now he only comes out when Neji comes….over…" Sasuke's head had jerked up at Neji's name. He met the black eyes with a bland look of his own and took a shot in the dark. "In fact he's there now. Neji. Personally, I think Neji's a lot healthier for Naruto than you are, but this was a special request. Naruto never asks for anything, so here I am."

Sasuke bent back to his notebook. "You can see yourself out."

"I see. And Naruto's request?"

"You know where you can stick it."

Iruka got off the couch, but turned back to Sasuke before leaving. "I don't know what happened the day you took him out, or what he sees in you, but he was really counting on you being his first friend. I said you might surprise him, but clearly my first instincts about you were correct." He looked at the scribbling on Sasuke's notebook a moment. "Naruto's a whiz at math."

Itachi had the door open before Iruka reached it, and shut it firmly behind him once he'd gone. A few minutes passed, with him leaning on the doorknob. "Want me to help you with the math?" he ventured.

Sasuke chucked both the textbook and the notebook across the kitchen and into the trashcan. "Fuck it."

Itachi opened the door again, as Sasuke snatched his jacket off the hook and barged out. _Knew I shouldn't have let that asshole in_, he thought_. _

* * *

Naruto was waiting in the main room when Iruka came back. He went up to him anxiously. "Well? What'd he say?"

"Pretty much what I told you he'd say," Iruka said. He put a hand on Naruto's shoulder. "I'm sorry, Naruto, but it's probably best you forget him. There are other friends." He cast a meaningful glance at where Neji stood a few feet away.

Forget Sasuke? Naruto didn't think that was possible. Sasuke was an ass, but he couldn't stop thinking about the way that same ass had panicked when he'd gotten heat stroke and treated him behind a dumpster. He could remember the feel of Sasuke's tough palm against his cheek, and the way he'd rested a hand on his chest when his heart had been racing. Sasuke had chosen him, and had cared enough about him to want him to change his clothes…even if that meant stealing new ones. He'd worried about him, and had called his brother for help, when that couldn't have been easy for him.

He didn't know what he'd done to make Sasuke change his mind, but he intended to find out. _I'll never forget him._

-oOo-

Neji came up behind him. "Want to go for a walk?"

He didn't. "Okay."

Neji came over to the home every day, and every evening they went for these walks.

Hinata had been ecstatic at seeing her cousin take an interest in the home at long last. Apparently she'd been trying to get him interested for years. Iruka had likewise been pleased, until it became obvious that Neji's only interest was Naruto. He brought a T-shirt for Naruto that first day, and took him to play ball again. When they weren't at the park, Neji was with him at the home, where he talked his ear off about how he intended to enlist in the Academy. All he ever talked about was the Academy, serving in the Academy, and how much martial arts he already knew.

And when he wasn't talking about how great he was at martial arts, he was making it known just what his interest in Naruto was. "I mean, I only have until September before I enlist," he would say. "I'd like to make the most of my last days of freedom."

Under normal circumstances, Naruto might have been flattered…if he was sure he was into boys. He _wasn't_ sure. He'd never been romantically involved with anyone, nor had a lot of prospects come his way over the years. He demurred as best he could, but sometimes Neji got insistent, and it was usually on these nighttime walks.

Naruto hated the walks.

They came to the park, as usual. Naruto wondered if Neji knew of any other location in the city. This late, the park was empty of children; only a few couples walked hand in hand. He turned automatically for the footpath they usually took. Unlike previous times, though, Naruto saw Neji spray his mouth with breath freshener.

Naruto stopped. "Neji, look…"

"I know it's your first time," Neji said. His smile was assured. Confidant. "You don't have to worry. I'll go slowly."

Naruto blinked in shock. _Dude didn't even ask me if I wanted his dick, _he thought in wonder. He wasn't quite sure what to say. "I-"

"I got protection," Neji said quickly. He brought a condom out of his pocket. "The men's room should be empty. No kids around."

_The fuck?_ "Okay, you know what? I first laid eyes on you a week ago. I know nothing about you besides the fact that you're hard up for the Academy, and you know even less than that about me. I'm not into you. I've tried every polite way I can think of to let you know that, but now I'm saying it straight out. I'm. Not. Interested. And if I was, I wouldn't want my first time, or _any_ time, to be in the piss-stained bathroom of the local park. _God_." Naruto turned away from Neji's stunned face, then swung back. "Are you so fucking insensitive? Trolling for lays before you head to the Academy, like someone carbing up before a marathon? The fuck's _wrong_ with you? I don't know anything about anything, and even _I_ know that's sick."

Neji slowly put the condom back in his pocket. "It's not like I have time to cultivate a relationship…not that I want one. I'm 18 for fuck's sake. I'm just being real. What, you'd rather I led you on with false hope of a relationship?"

Naruto threw his hands in the air. "How about simple friendship? That cross your mind?"

"Not really. I mean, you live at the home-" Neji stopped himself, but it was too late.

"Oh." Naruto's face was suddenly smooth and blank. "I get it. I'm not worth friendship. Just a quick fuck."

"No," Neji protested, face red. "I mean I like you, you're hot, but…you know I'm not so big into the friendship scene. _Academy, _remember? Won't really have contact with civilians, so…" he looked down at his sneakers.

Naruto looked at him and wondered how someone so good-looking, who was generally a nice enough person most of the time, could turn out to be so one-dimensional. An idea came to him. "Maybe we can come to an arrangement."

Neji perked up at once. "I like that. An arrangement, yes. I scratch your back, you scratch mine. What do you need?"

_Not what do I want. What do I need. _Naruto looked at Neji's pale eyes and knew –_knew_- that the Academy would be receiving a shark. Maybe even a natural killer. Neji was someone who probably _never_ did friendship or relationships, not just now before he was set to enlist. He used people to get what he wanted, and so understood the basic principles of manipulation. Neji probably wasn't even aware of any lack within himself. Naruto was barely aware of it…it came to him in vague notions. A gut feeling, some base understanding of the guy in front of him that had nothing to do with psychology, and everything to do with instinct.

He didn't think Neji was a bad person, not yet, but he definitely had the potential to be very dangerous.

Sasuke had to have seen him on the court that day. Neji was only and inch or two taller than him, but Sasuke had chosen the redhead. Naruto now knew that particular redhead to be a quiet sort of person. Which meant Sasuke had probably known who would put up a fight and who wouldn't; he known Neji was dangerous too.

"I need you to find someone for me."

"And if I do?" Neji said. "We'll dance?"

"I'll…consider it. Depends on if you find him, and if you can get me to see him."

Neji gave a slow, wolfish smile.

* * *

Sasuke took the bus to Oto, which was a few towns over from Konoha. Konoha wasn't great, but Otogakure was the butt crack of the entire province. Whenever he left home, this was where he came.

Jobs were virtually nonexistent in Oto. Just about the entire city was on welfare, or some other form of government assistance. This was where drug trafficking and prostitution reigned, where every other person on the street was packing heat, and where bars covered all the windows. This is where there were more liquor stores than grocery stores, and where meth kids ran half naked in the streets.

This was where Sasuke felt at home. Where he could release the paper-thin veneer of civility he wore in Konoha and just be himself.

With the hood of his sleeveless sweatshirt covering his face, and his dark jeans, he blended right in. He wasn't interested in drugs or skanks, though he'd sampled his fair share of twinks. He had no use for liquor. All he wanted was cash. The quick, easy, fat rolls of cash certain men carried whenever their weasels dropped off loot.

He happened to know that Sunday was payday for quite a few dealers. One of those dealers was slow. Soft. Sasuke had never made his acquaintance, which was only to say he'd never targeted him. So far, he'd only hit weasels. This would be the first dealer he hit, but he needed more cash than usual. Once he finished summer school, he was getting out of Konoha for good. Once summer school started, he'd be too busy busting his ass to finish the work load to come out here and cruise. This had to be now.

-oOo-

His mark was up the block, outside a strip club. This was another popular business in Oto. He was leaning against his car, some fancy black thing that hugged the ground. His mark was surrounded by his weasels. Nine of them, all apparently shaking his hand and bumping shoulders in greeting, but Sasuke saw the exchange of bills.

He knew the routine. His mark would stand there awhile, make idle chit chat with his weasels, then shake their hands again in parting, this time with product being exchanged instead of money. Off the weasels would go, and his mark, instead of getting into his car, would go into the strip club for an hour or two. Come out shitfaced, and then get in his car.

Sasuke didn't know cars, but he knew the Internet. Ten minutes of research had shown him what he needed to know; that car wouldn't be starting up anytime soon. So he waited, tucked beneath the dark overhang of doorway. A cigarette in his hand, taking fake puffs now and then, head down low. Watching.

Winos came and went, shuffling aimlessly. A shadow or two ghosted up to him and asked if he was looking to score some blow. His silence discouraged most. A single glance took care of the rest. He knew what they saw on his face. It was the emptiness, the soullessness that he'd lived with for the past ten years.

In Konoha, he had to pretend. He didn't try too hard, given the relationship he had with his brother and the way he'd flunked school, but his life in Konoha was still bright. Still had…humanity in it. His brother. People. Things. He had to reign himself in, keep just how dark he was confined to the times he was alone. He didn't do his shit in Konoha. Too easy to get caught. But he practically lived in Oto, with its dark streets and desperate denizens. Here, where pain and suffering were the daily food and drink, this was where he could be himself. Itachi didn't understand. No one did.

For a moment he thought he heard Naruto's voice. His face popped up in Sasuke's mind, all bright blond hair, and moody blue eyes. For a second, just a second, he'd let himself be taken in by the prospect of sharing himself with Naruto. He'd thought Naruto was like him. Dark like him. That they could run together. He'd almost brought him here, to Oto. Stupid visions of them hitting the streets. But Naruto had proven to be nothing like him. He would have gotten him killed. The thought left him breathless again, the way he'd been when seeing Naruto laid up in his bed. His bowels cramped painfully a moment, remembering Iruka's visit, but he firmly put Naruto out of his mind. His mark was coming out of the club.

* * *

He waited through the song and dance with the car. Waited while his mark finally realized it wouldn't start, and slammed out of it. Waited while the man scratched drunkenly at his head. And began following when his mark left the car behind and started weaving down the street.

Sasuke wondered how the man hadn't been jacked before now. His routine was easy to learn, and he was laughably vulnerable every Sunday. Once or twice he'd followed his mark into the club, just to make sure he wasn't dropping off the money in there. He wasn't. Those rolls of cash were tucked into the worn leather jacket he wore. There were no bodyguards, no gun-wielding escorts, so how was it this man managed to go unmolested every week?

He didn't know or care. The man's route would take him through a filthy park, that was nonetheless pitch black. Sasuke picked up his pace. He would make his move there.

-oOo-

It never occurred to him that he was wrong. He was never wrong.

So when the man turned and caught his downward swing, twisting the blade out of his hand, he was more surprised than scared. He never got scared.

He wasn't a fighter. Wasn't athletic. He knew how to use his knife, and had more brains than most. Those were his weapons. When he heard a gun cock, and felt the hard barrel of it pressed beneath his chin, he just went still. _Let it happen. Just let it happen fast, _he thought. All things considered, it would be a relief.

But a roar shattered the night, one that was human instead of mechanical, and something crashed into him and his mark both. The gun went off. He felt something burning hot sizzle past his right temple, heard the gun fall to the ground, then the sound of fists making contact with flesh. By chance, when he fell to the ground, he rolled right over his blade. He snatched it up and got shakily to his feet.

Someone was engaging his mark in hand to hand, and losing. His mark got an arm around the guy's neck, and the dark hood was pulled back enough to reveal Naruto, who twisted free and landed a kick to the guy's sternum. Sasuke waded in without thinking, and aimed his blade high. He put all his weight behind it, deaf and blind to anything but his all-consuming, ever-present, constant need to hurt someone.

His mark went down, and he went down with him, blade driving into him again and again and again.

No one stopped him. No one told him to stop. He only stopped when his hand became so slicked with blood that the blade turned and cut him instead of his mark. His mark was nearly dead.

Sasuke folded his dripping blade and put it in his pocket. Pulled the halves of his mark's leather jacket aside and reached past all the blood. Five fat rolls of cash. Seven. And some banded bills. Several grand. He was in business.

For a minute or two he just sat there, holding the money. Then he brought his knapsack off his back and shoved the money in there. Some of the rolls were bloody, but it would wash. When he stood up, he saw Naruto standing a few feet away, staring at him with wide, frightened eyes.

He stared back, completely uncomprehending.

Naruto turned and ran.

Sasuke frowned after him. Looked down at his cooling mark. All at once understanding crashed through him. He was present once more, aware of how this looked and what Naruto had seen him do. Swinging his bag onto his back, he ran after him.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Not thirty seconds after he took off in Naruto's wake, Sasuke concluded that he wouldn't be catching him anytime this century. Under normal circumstances, that is to say when not fueled by adrenaline, his body wasn't agile. It didn't respond to physical activity positively, whereas Naruto…

The blond hair and black hoodie dwindled amazingly fast, disappearing far ahead into the distance as Naruto's arms and legs pumped in the rhythm of a born runner. Sasuke was out of breath after a single block. Almost choking for air, he staggered to a stop.

He couldn't think. Leaning his hands on his knees to bark out a hacking cough –wheezing and gasping, still- he saw that his hands were gloved in red. He just couldn't breathe, couldn't remember, couldn't _think_.

His hands. So red and wet. Like-

_No._

Slowly, he sat there on the sidewalk. His hands rested to either side of himself, where he couldn't see them. A confusion of thoughts swirled in his mind: Naruto seeing him at his worst, and going to the cops. Trouble. Jail. His brother. The man, his mark, possibly dead. Probably dead. This last froze him where he sat, chilling him so that a shudder worked through him. _If he's dead, then I…killed him._

_I killed him._

* * *

Naruto didn't know where he was going. He was just running. Not from Sasuke, so much as from the realization that Sasuke was too much. Too…dark. All he saw, while he ran, was the mindless way that gleaming blade had risen and fell, risen and fell. The droplets of blood that had sprayed each time it had been jerked free of the man's body, the faint, meaty _tchunk_ sound each time it had fallen. Sasuke. Sasuke sitting back, hands red, face splattered, to calmly hunt for the man's money. Sasuke looking blank, and soulless, and utterly inhuman as he'd stabbed the guy repeatedly.

-oOo-

He and Neji had taken the bus. It was a novel experience for Naruto, who'd had his face pressed to the filthy bus window for most of the ride. Sights and scenery had passed by and he'd taken in the display greedily. He had no idea where they were going, or where Oto was, only that Neji had said this was where Sasuke went. At some point during the 2-hour ride, Neji had produced a map of the province, and shown Naruto where Otogakure was in relation to Konoha. Naruto had tucked the map into his pocket, unable to understand much of what it showed.

Once in Oto, Neji explained how Sasuke seemed to follow a little routine of watching some man. Naruto had been busily cataloging the differences between Oto and Konoha, but he'd listened attentively. He and Neji had been across the street, hidden in shadows, while Sasuke watched some man outside a strip club. At first Naruto had called out to him when they arrived, but Neji had quickly _shush-_ed him; the man Sasuke was watching was surrounded by people Neji said were dangerous and probably armed. Better to wait until they'd gone, he'd said. Naruto had waited.

A few suspect individuals had approached them, but Neji's tall musculature and steely stare discouraged anyone from actually speaking to them. Neji even went so far as to make sure Naruto stood behind him. This protectiveness left Naruto feeling touched and absurdly resentful of the fact that Neji would be joining the Academy in a few months.

When Sasuke began following the man away from the club, Neji nodded. "Now's your chance to talk to him or whatever. I'll be in that club when you're done. Unless you need me to come with?" He looked doubtful of a sudden as he took in their surroundings again, then dropped his eyes to size Naruto up. "I probably _should_ come with you. There's no telling who or what might-"

"No," Naruto said. "I need to talk to him alone."

"This isn't a great neighborhood," Neji fretted. "And you're…you."

Naruto had no idea what that meant, but he was adamant. Neji reluctantly agreed to let Naruto follow Sasuke alone. "I'll meet you back here in an hour," Naruto said. "Okay? Please?"

"All right. One hour exactly, before I come looking for you. Be careful," Neji said, but whatever protective streak he had was apparently narrow; his eyes were already glued to the club as they crossed the street.

He'd followed Sasuke at a safe distance, aware of faceless eyes in alleys and shadowy doorways. They watched as he passed. He'd pulled his hood over his head, tugging it low over his face, and that had been better. He was still noticed, but now he seemed to blend in more.

Contrary to what he'd thought, Sasuke hadn't been waiting to have a private word with the guy. From his position a block and a half away, he'd seen what appeared to be a brief fight going on between Sasuke and the man. Even at that distance, he'd been able to hear the faint click of a gun being cocked. It was a sound he'd only heard on television. And then he was charging forward, no thought in his head but Sasuke.

He was fit. Strong. Athletic. But he'd never been in a fight. He didn't know _how_ to fight, beyond mimicking things he'd seen in movies. It was a surprise to him to learn just how much it hurt to punch someone, and how hard it was to physically overpower another person. But then Sasuke had been there, closing in with that knife, and he'd stumbled out of the way just in time.

Sasuke had been silent. Deliberate. He'd looked almost calm while stabbing that guy, except his eyes had been wide and fixated the entire time. Again, the thought that Sasuke had looked inhuman crossed his mind.

-oOo-

Now at the club, Naruto finally slowed to a walk, then stopped altogether. Neji was nowhere in sight. Probably inside. The black car that man had been trying to start still sat in the same spot in front of the club. Naruto looked at it, thought of its owner lying dead, and simply bent over to empty his guts. Right there on the sidewalk, by the club's peeling pink stairs. The bouncer stationed at the head of the stairs, outside the club's doors, looked on dispassionately.

When he was done, Naruto moved away from his mess and squat on his heels. Head in his hands, he tried to think.

Almost from the moment he'd met Sasuke, it seemed there had been one thing or another urging him to keep his distance. If it wasn't Iruka –despite his exhortations to be hopeful- it was Sasuke's own behavior, or his own disgust with Sasuke's lack of principles. Or the way Sasuke himself seemed to dislike him.

He wanted someone. More than anything else in life, even more than wanting a home, Naruto just wanted _someone. _

He sat there for a long time. Eventually he sniffed and got up. Wiped his nose on his sleeve, and resolutely walked back the way he'd come.

A minute later, Neji came out of the club, saw Naruto two blocks away and followed him.

* * *

He came upon Sasuke sitting on a street corner a block from the park. Squinting, Naruto could just make out the body of the man where it lay a few feet inside the entrance. He looked back at Sasuke's bent head. "Hey."

Sasuke didn't respond.

Naruto lightly kicked his hip. "Sasuke."

Still no answer.

Looking around, Naruto saw that they were at an intersection, of sorts. On his left, a convenience store sat in the middle of a block of liquor stores, with project housing on the opposite side of the street. To his right sat more housing. Behind him, he'd passed a garage, a gas station, and more housing after the club. Ahead sat the tiny park, with more housing beyond. Oto was a hodgepodge mix of residential and commercial property, it seemed, without the order he was accustomed to seeing in Konoha on his infrequent trips from the home.

Up the block and on his left, he saw a group of shadowy individuals loitering outside one of the liquor stores. A cloud of grayish white hung above their heads, with faint orange dots periodically winking in and out of sight to signal that they were smoking cigarettes. They were looking at him and Sasuke. Naruto got down on Sasuke's level, and shoved him gently. "Hey. Sasuke. Get up."

Sasuke's eyes slowly rose to his, then kept rising, looking at someone behind Naruto. Naruto was caught off guard by the empty look in those black eyes, but felt his scalp prickle with fear at feeling someone at his back. He turned quickly, expecting an attack, but it was only Neji. Neji, however, was looking to their left where, it seemed, the smokers had finally decided to come over and investigate.

-oOo-

There were seven of them.

Naruto got to his feet, as the prickle of fear returned with interest; the way they walked, their hooded eyes, how the smokes were casually tossed aside to free their hands- this all communicated a sense of imminent danger to Naruto. As loathsome as the home was sometimes, he realized now that it had always sheltered him from the ugliness of life, a fact he was now submerged in. He was in danger, and he was afraid, and he had no idea what to do. He wished he was at the home, surrounded by nothing more harmful than a bunch of annoying kids. Right now he would welcome Iruka's over-protectiveness and Hinata's shy mothering.

Sasuke sat at his feet. Naruto had the wild notion that he would rather like to see the violent, inhuman side of him right now, but all Sasuke did was stare at his lap.

Neji placed himself between Naruto and Sasuke and the group of seven, for which Naruto was secretly grateful. He stood shaking behind this tall shield, as the seven slowly spread out to surround them. Resisting the urge to clutch at the back of Neji's shirt, Naruto nonetheless recalled all his boasting on martial arts training. He hoped it was accurate. A discreet glance at where Neji's hands hung at his sides showed them to be broad and thick. Capable hands. Hopefully strong hands.

"Well, now," one of the seven drawled. "Y'alls lost?"

Neji did the speaking. "No."

"Look like y'all lost," another said. "Wan' some he'p?"

"We don't need your help."

Neji kept his eyes on the ones in front of him, but Naruto had the impression that he was also aware of the ones at his back. Naruto turned his head to look for himself, and was given a sick jolt at seeing a gun tucked into one guy's waistband. Yet another held some kind of long, thin thing that wasn't exactly a knife, but which looked deadly anyway. This one kicked Sasuke hard in the thigh, and Naruto cried out.

That seemed to be their cue; they closed in on them with faint mutters and curses. Naruto yelled Neji's name.

Neji went for the one who'd spoken first, who, Naruto saw in horror, also had a gun. It was leveled at Neji. He expected Neji to be shot in the face, but that didn't happen. Neji ducked to one side as he charged, also expecting a shot to be fired. It was, and the bullet took one of the seven in the throat. Naruto stood there and watched blood so dark it was nearly black gurgle out of the hole in the man's neck. He dropped to his knees, both hands over the wound, but then another gun was drawn, this one by the man Naruto had seen behind him. He pointed it at Neji, who was grappling with his opponent, and fired.

Naruto screamed, and dropped down beside Sasuke. "Sasuke, help!" he bawled.

Miraculously, Neji wasn't hit. He slammed his opponent's head on the sidewalk, putting him out of commission, before taking up the gun he'd held and spinning on one knee to take out the man who'd fired at him. the man went down with a smoking hole in his chest, though he wasn't dead. Two more drew guns. Neji swiveled, sighting and firing in calm detachment. One bullet took a man in the eye, another dead center of his forehead. The rest were running. Some up the block, one for a car parked not twenty feet from where they stood. Neji fired at the fleeing ones first –and managing to bring them down- while calmly getting to his feet and walking toward the car. Its owner was behind the wheel now.

Neji stood in the street and took aim. The driver dipped sideways, presumably to shield his face from the imploding glass, but when he came up he had a shotgun cocked and pointed out the windshield. Neji only had time to widen his eyes before the bullet that took him in the shoulder spun him. He dropped to his knees. There was a squeal of tires; the car jumped forward and plowed into Neji, sending him flying several feet, before he rolled up against the shallow rise of the sidewalk.

Naruto had his hands over his ears, mouth stretched wide in a silent shriek of pure terror.

* * *

_I killed him, I killed him, I killed him. _This thought looped endlessly in Sasuke's foggy brain. He was aware and not aware of Naruto's face, of him talking, maybe even shouting. There were people, gunshots, blood. And then it was quiet, and he could hear the thought again, echoing in his head and trying to smother his mind.

Eventually he did hear, though. Faintly, as if from a great distance, he heard the terrified, panic-stricken sound of someone's hoarse voice screaming for help. Just screaming, over and over. The sound of that scratchy voice was so incredibly abrasive that Sasuke blinked, and consciously suppressed the echoing thought long enough to turn his head in search of it. He wanted to tell the person to shut up. To let him be miserable in peace, and do their screaming elsewhere.

But it was Naruto screaming. He was in the middle of the street, crouched over someone's body, and screaming for someone to please help him or call 911. A quick glance showed faces at windows, in apartments and stores, but no one moved to help. They only watched.

Naruto saw him looking. "Sasuke." His voice was lowered from its previous volume. Shaky and quavery and clogged with tears. "Sasuke, please. Please."

He found himself crawling off the sidewalk, over some man with a serious throat wound who tugged weakly at his pants leg as he passed, and into the street. When he reached Naruto, he looked down, and saw it was Neji. His hair was spread beneath him, his eyes half closed.

_I killed a man. I killed someone, just like-_

_No. No!_

"Sasuke?" Naruto hiccupped. "Is he…is he dead?"

"Yes." _I killed him, you saw me do it. _It was hard to think, to focus on the one in front of him and not the one in the park. "I mean…no." He could see a faint pulse beating in Neji's neck. "I don't know."

A fresh wave of crying bowed Naruto's head. He wheezed a moment, trying to gain control of himself. Sasuke looked at him. Looked at Neji. "Can you s-save him?" Naruto bleated. The last word came out high-pitched.

Sasuke ran his eyes over Neji. "No."

Naruto stared at him. Sasuke's face was still bloody, still blank, but those eyes were sharp, he saw. He could see the way they cataloged Neji's injuries. A hazy memory of Sasuke picking him up and slinging him across his shoulders surfaced in his mind. Of Sasuke having this same sharp look in his eyes, of using words he didn't know. Sasuke treating him. Saving him.

Anger, swift and cleansing, swept through Naruto and doused the majority of his grief. Without warning, he slapped Sasuke hard, lunging over Neji to grab him by his shirt. "Yes you can, you can save him, you bastard, you can _save_ him, you can, you can s-save him…" He collapsed with his head in Sasuke's lap, as tears threatened once more, but sat up again immediately.

Sasuke was standing up. He bent over Neji and caught him beneath the arms. "Help me move him."

* * *

The convenience store was closed. Sasuke said it would have the most supplies, though, and told Naruto to take one of the guns lying in the street and shoot the padlock. Naruto cautiously took up a gun, dropped it, yelled when it went off, and finally managed to pick it up and hold it gingerly on the second try. He needed three shots to hit the lock. The window shattered with his first attempt.

-oOo-

Inside, it was dark and musty. There was still merchandise on the shelves, so the place couldn't have been closed too long. Sasuke directed Naruto to help him lay Neji out in the middle of the store, with the aisles to one side of them.

At first Sasuke did nothing. Only stared around as if wondering where he was. Naruto waited for him to do something, to help Neji, but all Sasuke did was kneel there at Neji's torso. He felt his anger returning. The longer Sasuke waited, the longer Neji went without attention. "I checked," he said to Sasuke's bewildered face. "There's no phone here. We can't call an ambulance. So it's you or he dies. You want that to happen? I know you go around killing people now, and that your fun seems to consists of stabbing guys for kicks, but I'm not going to let you let him die. You fucking murderer, you better-"

Sasuke flinched. Naruto checked his tirade, watching him warily. But Sasuke only got up and went to the back of the store. When he didn't return, Naruto cursed and went after him.

He was standing at the freezer, where ice was sold. His back was to Naruto, head bowed. "I didn't mean to kill him," Sasuke whispered. "I didn't."

Naruto blinked. "The…man in the park?"

Sasuke shuddered. "I didn't mean to. I only wanted to hurt him."

The anger went out of Naruto at seeing Sasuke's shoulders shake. He realized with a shock that Sasuke was crying, and slowly went to stand beside him. He had to bend to see his face, but Sasuke turned away from him.

The crying was short-lived. A few tears that seemed to dry up as soon as they started, to leave Sasuke weak and listless. He turned and slid to the floor, with his back against the freezer. "I can't help Neji," he choked out. "I can't help anybody. We should go, before someone else comes." His hands rested on his drawn-up knees.

Neji's condition worried Naruto, but at that moment Sasuke's called to him more strongly. The shock of the firefight was fading a bit; he didn't feel as hysterical or panicky, not with Sasuke's tears sobering him the way they were. He was able to remember his reason for coming back to Sasuke after having run away.

Naruto slid down beside him. After a minute, he said, "Why? Why _did_ you kill him?"

Sasuke was a long time answering. "I…don't know." His mind, never far from the attack in the park, not since it happened, cast itself back to the moment he'd felt the gun against the underside of his chin. He would have been shot, he had no doubt about that, but that wasn't why he'd stabbed the man so many times. He didn't care about his own life. But then he remembered falling to the ground as someone rescued him. He'd looked up and seen his mark fighting someone. Saw his mark winning, and…"You were there," he said slowly.

Naruto looked at him hard.

"You…were there. He was…"

Sasuke's words were so halting, so low, that Naruto struggled to fill in the blanks, to read Sasuke's thoughts in order to see the whole idea behind his broken speech. To understand, really understand, this person beside him. Frowning with the effort, he thought maybe he _did_ see. Something contracted painfully in his chest. "He was…hurting me," Naruto said. His voice was just as low. He was afraid that if he spoke any louder, he would lose the tenuous connection he'd established with Sasuke, and thus this glimpse into mind. "He was hurting me, so you…?"

"Hurt him first." Sasuke stared at the floor, brows drawn together as if he wasn't seeing the floor, but the man he'd stabbed. "Before he could..."

"…Hurt me more?"

"Yes. And then…" And then he'd just gone away, Sasuke thought with difficulty. He'd forgotten Naruto completely. And when he was done, he went for the money, as he'd originally planned; his mind had completely erased the whole thing for a few seconds. He'd had the money, and so he was good. It wasn't until he'd stood up and seen Naruto that memory returned. When it did, he'd looked down to see just what he'd done. "I'm not…" His throat was dry. Talking hurt. "I'm not…a murderer. I hurt…people. Sometimes. But, I'm not-" He couldn't finish.

Naruto stared at Sasuke's bloody hand, where it rested on his knee.

He wanted someone. When he was small, he used to lie awake at night and dream up scores of friends for himself. Always, though, there would be one special someone, his best friend. Someone he told secrets to, who played with him, and who didn't mind that he was stupid. His friend wouldn't care that no one wanted him, because _he_ wanted him. He would always want him, always be there to protect him, to make much over his cuts and scrapes, to talk to and laugh with. During the day, Naruto would think about having such a person, and vow that he would be the best friend ever in return. Whatever flaws his friend had, he would accept them, because that's what friends did. You held on to friends no matter what they did to you, or how mad they made you, and you could rest easy in the knowledge that your friend would stick by you with the same devotion, no matter what you did to piss them off or hurt them.

That was what he wanted. Someone to call his own.

Fate had given him Sasuke. Sasuke was nothing like the stalwart friend Naruto had imagined so many times, but he'd chosen Naruto just the same. Sasuke had tried to steal for him. Had worried over him when he'd collapsed with heatstroke. Had brought him to his own house and treated him. And he'd stabbed a man for him. Maybe not solely for his sake, but he'd stabbed him nonetheless out of fear for Naruto's safety.

In the home, you learned to cherish what few belongings you had, even if they were broken beyond repair. You held on to them, because you weren't likely to get a replacement. You worked with what you had, and made it serviceable.

Sasuke was clearly broken, but Naruto continued to stare at his bloody hand until he hesitantly covered it with his own. Sasuke was _his_. His friend. And broken or not, he wasn't walking away from him.

"I believe you," he said quietly. "You didn't mean to kill him." He sensed Sasuke turning his head to look at him, and turned to meet the eyes as well. "And…and even if you did…even if you meant to kill him, I…understand." And he did. He wasn't without his own faults, his own rages. He kept them to himself, but he'd known the urge to hurt on several occasions. To rail at the hand he'd been dealt and lash out, to hurt others as much as he was hurting inside. That he didn't act on those urges, while Sasuke did, made very little difference to his mind just then. "It's okay. Okay? I won't…tell. I won't." He squeezed the bloody hand. Then, because Sasuke hadn't looked away, he cautiously reached over with his other arm, and gave him an awkward hug. "It'll be our secret," he whispered. "Okay?"

Sasuke closed his eyes. He didn't feel better, but there was a distinct…shift, in his internal landscape. Something in him moved. Made room for the unfamiliar yet bitterly longed-for absolution he was receiving. He was being handed acceptance. Offered a hand. A chance. Another shoulder to help carry his burden, and he took it. He took it all, and clenched his jaws against the emotion welling up his throat.

His free hand came up and touched Naruto's arm. Just a light, brief acknowledgement, accompanied by a deep sigh. "Okay," he said.

* * *

When Naruto released him, Sasuke looked at him for a minute or two, as if not quite sure what to make of him. But then he looked behind Naruto to where Neji's head was just visible at the end of the aisle. "Batteries."

"What?"

"There are flashlights on the wall behind the counter. Get the biggest one you can find and put batteries in it, I need light."

"Wha-"

Sasuke was all jerky motion, swinging his knapsack off his back to take out that penlight Naruto remembered. He was at Neji's side a moment later looking into his eyes. "Left pupil's blown, shit."

Naruto ran for the light and batteries, noticing as he did that there were people gathering outside, around the fallen men who'd attacked them.

Back at Neji's side, he held the light while Sasuke upended a bottle of peroxide onto his hands, scrubbing them hard. He brought another bottle and one of rubbing alcohol to where Neji lay, went back for dishtowels and a water bottle, and brought all this back to Neji. "Pulse is weak. Steady, but he's fading."

"Should I-"

One of the onlookers outside came to the doorway. "Seen what happened."

Sasuke didn't reply, but Naruto looked up fearfully. "L-leave us alone."

"Some of them out there still breathing," the stranger said. He watched as Sasuke took one of the many blades he seemed to carry, and cleaned it with alcohol. "If'n you's a doctor-"

"They tried to kill us!" Naruto squawked indignantly. His hand jerked in his agitation.

"Hold that light still," Sasuke snapped. He put his ear to Neji's mouth and chest, frowning as he concentrated, then shook his head. "Tension pneumo, probably even a hemothorax. I can't tell for sure, fuck it to hell. I need equipment, and don't have _shit_." He took up the water bottle. It was the reusable kind.

Naruto and the stranger watched as Sasuke took off the cover, and extracted the heavy-duty plastic straw inside. He cut away Neji's shirt with a scissors he'd brought. Using his left hand, he felt along Neji's ribcage, as if counting, then cut into the skin he bracketed with his thumb and forefinger. Naruto winced, especially when that straw was punched in and a fountain of blood spurted out. Neji suddenly gasped, though he didn't respond to Sasuke calling his name. Naruto thought the blood coming out of the straw seemed like a hell of a lot, but Sasuke only looked up at the stranger. "Get me a drill."

The guy was also looking at all the blood. "A what, now?"

"A drill! Get me a fucking drill!"

The man disappeared.

Naruto held the light as Sasuke gently felt along Neji's ribs. He came to the gunshot wound in his shoulder. "Definite rib fractures. Bullet tore a chunk of meat off the shoulder, but missed the bone," he muttered. He doused the wound with peroxide and told Naruto to hold a towel to it.

Naruto juggled the flashlight a moment, as he pressed the towel to Neji's shoulder. "Should we try to find a phone? Call the hospital?" he said.

"I doubt they'll come. Not to this part of the 'hood."

"Your brother, then?"

"No."

"But…what are we going to do? He looks bad."

"He _is_ bad. I need to get him stabilized before he moves anywhere, though. I should have treated him sooner." His eyes flicked up to meet Naruto's. Naruto heard the unspoken thought. If Sasuke hadn't sat around boohoo-ing over the man in the park, Neji would have received prompt attention. "I don't know if I can save him."

"You can," Naruto said. He had unshakable faith in those sharp eyes. "I believe in you."

-oOo-

The man came back with a rusty toolbox. Sasuke carefully selected a drill bit, scrubbed it with alcohol and peroxide, and fit it into the drill. He pressed the trigger a few times, studying the velocity of the bit's motion, then set it down and moved to Neji's head. Here, he used his fingers as if measuring again, counting three fingers up from Neji's left ear and three fingers over. Taking hold of the hair at this spot, he cut it short with a scissors, and shaved the rest with a disposable razor and some shaving cream, items he'd brought with the dishtowels. He swabbed the area several times, placed some folded dishtowels beneath Neji's head, then used his knife to make an incision in the skin he had his finger against. There was a lot of blood, but Sasuke blotted carefully.

Naruto's stomach roiled heavily as he watched Sasuke part the skin of the incision to reveal gleaming bone. Sasuke placed the drill's bit against it. "What the fuck…what are you _doing_?" Naruto screeched.

"Car hit him. Threw him. He's got a depressed skull fracture, and signs of intracranial bleeding. He'll start seizing soon if I don't relieve the pressure."

Naruto understood none of that. "You're going to put a hole in his head?" A glance at the stranger showed his face to be just as appalled. "Jesus, Sasuke!"

"I have to," Sasuke muttered. "Burr holes are the only way. He could die if that pressure isn't relieved."

"But…"

Sasuke looked up at the stranger. "You. You're doing good, okay? See if you can get an ambulance to this part of town."

The man nodded quickly and vanished once again. Naruto inched closer with the flashlight, and licked his lips. "You sure about this?"

Sasuke chewed his own lip a moment. "Mostly sure. It's been a long time since I…" But he shook his head without finishing, and focused on the drill.

It was beyond Naruto's ability to express the horror of seeing Sasuke drill into Neji's skull, but he had to look in order to keep the light where Sasuke needed it. At the sound of the skull finally cracking, he thought he would vomit. Instead, he clamped his teeth shut and concentrated on breathing shallowly. Sasuke looked intent. Focused and intent.

"Okay…there's blood, but not…not arterial, I don't think," Sasuke murmured to himself. "Bring that light here, Naruto. Christ, I only did one craniotomy, before…dura looks intact. Seems blood and oxygen are still entering the brain, from the looks of it…thank fuck."

Again, Naruto understood nothing. He saw Sasuke carefully removing what looked like clotted blood with his bare fingers. He turned his head away a moment, but Sasuke asked for paper towel. He had to let go of Neji's shoulder to rip off a sheet, but he managed, and handed it to Sasuke. "N-" he cleared his throat a few times. "Now what?"

"Uh…" Sasuke had his face bent to Neji's scalp, clearly distracted, but at last he sat up straight and looked at Naruto. Then he looked out the open convenience store doorway. "I know they tried to fuck us over, but…"

Naruto followed his eyes. He understood. "But they need help," he finished for him.

"Yeah. And…I need you to come with me. To the…to the park."

Naruto looked back at him and met his eyes. He nodded. "All right."

* * *

Later, he would look back on the thirty minutes or so Sasuke spent flitting between the fallen men on the street and just shake his head. The things Sasuke did, how he bullied indifferent bystanders into helping him… Sasuke called it triage. Said the stretch of sidewalk he'd managed to get covered with a large tarp, and the score of large flashlights he had people train on it was an emergency trauma bay. His 'patients' were laid out and lined up on this tarp. Once it became clear that no further violence was taking place, the watchers from behind the windows had emerged in force. Poor and downtrodden as most of them were, they rallied to Sasuke's commands and assisted him however they could.

And later still, when he turned for the park with Naruto by his side, at least five of them tagged along with flashlights and more supplies.

-oOo-

The man was still breathing. Sasuke cursed in shock, or maybe it was wonder, but the man was definitely breathing. Naruto hunkered down with Sasuke as he inspected the wounds, and heard the feverish whispering to himself.

"-I mean, all I ever do is stick a person once, between the ribs. I _know_ how to stab, for fuck's sake, so as not to hit anything major. Even out of my mind like I was, I managed to fall back on that, and give superficial wounds. Punctures to the biceps, shoulders, one to the ribs, some lacerations along the abdomen, a few in the quads here…the only serious one looks like the first one I did, up here in the throat."

Naruto moved closer to see. Sasuke's voice was shaking but his fingers were steady. "How bad is it?"

Sasuke was a moment in answering, motioning for the woman behind him to bring the light closer. "Jesus. Another millimeter or two and I'd have sliced his carotid. It's deep, clear through his throat. Think his trachea is nicked…but he's breathing. Lost a lot of blood, but he's…he's not critical, I don't think. He's alive," Sasuke gusted suddenly. He hung his head, as if unable to bear the relief. "He's _alive_."

-oOo-

The people who'd followed Sasuke to the park worked together to carry the man back to Sasuke's trauma bay, where Sasuke did what he could for his wounds. The man who'd originally helped them, the one who'd supplied the drill, came puffing up with a cell phone in his hand. His face was doleful.

"Been tryin' t'find you," he said. "Got 911 on the line now. They ain't coming. Saying they amb'lances is all occupied in the field wit' other emergencies or some such shit. You wanna talk?" He thrust the phone at Sasuke, who finished tying off a tourniquet before taking it.

Sasuke's voice was cool and snarky, the way it had been when Naruto met him on that first night. "To whom am I speaking?" he said. Naruto couldn't help but smile, as Sasuke listened a moment. "Is that right. Well listen up, you piece of shit. I happen to know there are two hospitals in this miserable township. If you don't have ambulances to spare, then you phone over to Oto General and get theirs. I have an emergency crike, two tension pneumos, an extradural hematoma, and several critical requirements for blood and sutures. And…fatalities. _Get your asses down here_, or so help me I will call that corrupt son of a bitch you have for a governor, what's his name. Orochimaru? Him. I will call him and make it known in no uncertain terms that I will be going to the province press and airing all his dirty laundry about this joke of a town. And then I will go to Tsunade –yes, _the_ Tsunade, the one who runs _my_ town- and make sure she steps in and follows through. Trust me, I got nothing better to do; I will see you in hell for this, you and whoever the bleeding fuck is working night duty over there. Either grow a pair and send EMTs, or put me on with the director of your flea-ridden, crack-peddling, ass-sucking _dump_ of a hospital. _Now, _motherfucker. I don't have all night."

Sasuke listened a moment more, then violently pressed _end_ on the phone.

One of the women ventured forward. "They's comin'?"

"Yes," Sasuke nodded. "I'll wait here till they do."

The crowd was silent for a while, watching him with wide and marveling eyes. Naruto also watched him. Watched the way he timed pulses and moved between Neji and the other people on the tarp anxiously as they waited.

Five minutes later they all heard the sirens in the distance, quickly approaching their location.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Three ambulances rolled up with two patrol cars in tow. Sasuke hung back in the shadows, until one of the medics paused in tending the victims to ask who'd treated them. Several of the onlookers looked in Sasuke's direction, but the unspoken rule for anyone who'd grown up on the streets was golden: you never ratted someone out. Never, regardless to what it was, or if the actions in question could be perceived as good. A person's business was their business; minding your own kept you alive.

Still, Naruto gave Sasuke a small nudge with his elbow and raised his brows. Sasuke shook his head shortly. Naruto hesitated, but gave a small nod of understanding. He wouldn't saying anything either, his nod said.

But when his mark was loaded onto an ambulance, and Sasuke heard the EMTs incorrectly diagnosing the throat wound, he stepped forward. And then it all came out…each vic's stats, Neji's burr holes, how long they'd all been down. All of it.

The cops asked questions, whereupon the onlookers all developed varying cases of amnesia. His mark wasn't conscious, so he couldn't identify him, but Sasuke doubted the man had gotten a good look at him anyway. Naruto, though, had no experience with cops or trouble; they gave him one stare and he told everything he knew, suspected, or thought. Said he'd touched one of the guns in order to get into the convenience store. To his credit, he tried to leave Sasuke's name out of it as much as possible. Once it appeared nothing particularly incriminating existed for the boys, several of the onlookers came forward and said as how Sasuke and his friends had been attacked, and that Neji had defended them. To Sasuke's sick dread, he and Naruto were still required to accompany the cops to the station. A formal report needed to be filed, one burly cop said.

-oOo-

There were no charges pressed. One of the cops did bring them the info that Neji was stable and doing well, all things considered. Sasuke only nodded. He was acutely aware of his surroundings, and the fact that he was now officially on record as having been at the scene of a crime. Years of stabbing people, and now he was really inside a police station. Itachi would shit.

Naruto, Sasuke noticed with disgust, was all wide-eyed curiosity in the station. He craned his head this way and that, staring at handcuffed people being led elsewhere, and the tired, slump-shouldered cops who drank from stale cups of coffee. Sasuke couldn't wait to leave, but Naruto looked ready to move right in. By the time they left the station, it was after one in the morning.

* * *

Naruto stood with Sasuke on the sidewalk once they were free to leave, and looked at him expectantly. "What do we do now?" he asked brightly. As if they hadn't just witnessed two fatal shootings, a ton of blood, and Neji lying pale as a sheet on the ground. As if bullets hadn't flown at them only three hours ago. As if they were out on some kind of fun adventure.

Sasuke had long since rebuilt the walls he normally kept in place around people. The advent of the police had sobered him up quickly. He couldn't see himself doing anything differently regarding the wounded men, but that was all over now. Now he was stuck in Oto with Naruto, who'd witnessed a bunch of shit Sasuke bitterly wished he hadn't. Stabbing aside, he'd fucking _cried_ in front of Naruto. Said a bunch of wussy shit he'd rather have died than uttered. "We head home," he said shortly.

"Bus?" Naruto looked around alertly, as if one was just idling at the corner.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Buses stopped running between townships at midnight. I suppose I could call my brother…"

He didn't. But he did find a questionable looking cab that was parked in the space between two liquor stores, a few blocks from the police station. The interior was opaque with smoke, and the driver looked stoned out of his mind, but he agreed to drive out of Oto city limits and into Konoha, which Sasuke knew cabs weren't strictly allowed to do.

-oOo-

Naruto coughed and rolled the back windows down. Once they were on the highway, and the smoke had cleared, Sasuke rolled them right back up again. Lowering his voice, he pinned Naruto with a direct glare. "_What_ were you doing in Oto?" he hissed. He didn't want the cabbie overhearing through the Plexiglas partition separating the front of the cab from the back seat. "How'd you find me? The _hell_ was Neji doing there?"

So different was this Sasuke from the one who'd cried in the convenience store that Naruto spent a few seconds staring in open-mouthed surprise. "Neji helped me find you. I…came to talk to you. To ask why you left, if it was something I did."

Sasuke turned away from him in revulsion. "God, you make me sick."

That hurt. A lot. Bewildered, Naruto tried to understand how Sasuke could change so much from the guilt-ridden, genius superhero to the sullen and hateful boy he'd been at the home. More importantly, he wanted to know _why_ he'd changed, and when it had happened. "What's wrong with you?" he asked softly. _I thought we were friends now. _"Why are you being so mean?"

For several miles it looked as though Sasuke wouldn't answer. He chewed one thumbnail while staring moodily out the window. Naruto stared at his angry profile, and felt sick to his stomach. He was losing Sasuke all over again.

The cab swerved when Naruto yelled in surprise; Sasuke had suddenly turned and lunged at him, holding him to the door on his side, with the edge of his switchblade pressed to Naruto's neck. The black eyes were very close, and narrowed with an emotion Naruto was too preoccupied to analyze right then.

"You tell anyone –anyone!- what I did tonight, or what happened, and I will…you won't like what I do. You're leaving the home in four months. I'll find you, and that will be the end of you. Do you hear me? And that other shit, that junk I said in the store…you forget all of that. Mention _that_, and I won't wait four months. You feel me or not, numbnuts? Answer me!"

The cabbie stared back and forth between the road and his rear view mirror. Sasuke waited. The knife pressed a little harder against Naruto's neck, but Naruto only stared back.

There was fear in those dark eyes, Naruto decided. "I said I won't tell."

The knife relented just a bit as Sasuke relaxed. "Good-"

"And you don't have to be mad you cried in front of me, or embarrassed about what you told me. And since you _did_ tell me you're not a murderer, stop bluffing and get that thing off me."

Sasuke resumed the pressure instead. "Death's not the worst that can happen to someone. I can hurt you in a lot of ways…you want that?"

Naruto met the glittering black eyes without flinching. "Will it make you feel better?"

"Maybe…if you go running your mouth."

"Cut me, then."

Sasuke blinked. "I mean it, I will."

"So do it. Go ahead."

Slowly, looking into Naruto's steely eyes the whole time, Sasuke drew the blade across the soft skin of his throat. Blood welled along the edge of it immediately, but Naruto didn't move. He only swallowed at feeling the coolness of the knife, the way it parted his skin. So still and focused was he that he thought he could feel each tiny serration on that blade as it sliced through the thin layer of skin and fat at his neck. And then all he felt was a gush of heat as his blood coated the area. His heart beat out a slow, measured count. Sasuke re-positioned the blade on the other side of his neck to cut again.

"You're not going to kill me," Naruto said. "And now you know I'm not scared of you and your knife. So you'll believe me when I say I won't tell, and you'll know it's not because of your dumbass threats. It's because you're my friend. And I'll keep your secrets no matter what they are."

"Dumbass, huh? I'm the one with the knife against your neck. One move and you could bleed out right here, before this cab even has time to pull over."

"You _are_ dumb," Naruto insisted. "You've already played your hand; I know the feel of your knife now, so I'm not likely to run every time you threaten me with it. And then too…" Naruto's hand shot out, grabbed Sasuke's wrist, and twisted sharply. The blade fell to the cab's floor. Sasuke took a swing at Naruto, but Naruto jabbed instinctively, and caught Sasuke on the chin. "I'm not likely to _let_ you cut me again," Naruto said.

The stare they shared was long and hard. Sasuke's pride wouldn't let him back down, though, nor would his silent rage at Naruto hitting the nail so squarely on the head. He _was_ embarrassed. Ashamed. And now humiliated on top of it. Rubbing his chin, he finally flounced back to his side of the seat once more. This time he glowered out the window until they reached Konoha.

* * *

Naruto, holding a hand to his neck, was surprised to see them pull up in front of Sasuke's apartment building. The cabbie was paid with a bill from the rolls of money in Sasuke's knapsack.

Itachi looked up from his books at hearing the key in the door and just stared. He was up and coming around the table in the next second, reaching for Sasuke, who made as if to walk into his room without an explanation. He caught him by the back of his hair and dragged him to a halt. "Want to tell me why you're covered in blood?" he rasped.

"No." Sasuke tried to shrug free, moving to push his brother's hand off his shoulder.

Itachi caught the hand and turned it palm up. "This cut's deep. Needs stitches. What happened?" As if for the first time, he noticed Naruto standing to one side, and saw that he was bleeding too. His voice lowered dangerously. "Somebody better start talking."

Knowing that Itachi would keep him standing there all night if he had to, Sasuke cursed. "Can we clean up first? God."

Itachi reluctantly allowed them ten minutes. Sasuke snatched clothes from his room, and gave a tight toss of his head for Naruto to follow him. Once they were in the bathroom, he closed and locked the door behind them.

-oOo-

Naruto, Sasuke noticed, spent several moments smiling around the small space, as if he'd never seen one before. "The fuck's wrong with _you_?" he asked.

"You have a nice bathroom," Naruto said. He was grinning at the furry toilet seat cover, and actually brushed one hand over it a few times.

"Next you'll be kissing it," Sasuke said with a shake of his head. Their bathroom couldn't have been more ordinary.

Embarrassed, Naruto joined Sasuke at the sink.

In the mirror, both boys were treated to the first sight of their faces. No wonder Itachi had looked insane with worry; Naruto had a black eye and a split lip that must have come from his brief fight with Sasuke's attacker. One side of his neck was completely covered and crusted with blood, as was the hand he had on the cut. Sasuke had blood and grime streaked all over his face and dried in his hair. A lot of that was from a wound along the right side of his temple, but the bruise on his chin was from Naruto's fist.

For the second time that night Sasuke surprised Naruto. He turned to him and said, "Let me see," in a remarkably gentle voice.

Naruto gingerly removed his hand from his neck, wincing when dried blood cracked and fresh blood began to flow. Sasuke's fingers were cool as they probed the wound. He had that sharp look in his eyes again, the one Naruto was coming to associate with some kind of alter ego Sasuke liked to keep hidden.

Sasuke took a washrag, wet it, and wiped at the cut. For a moment afterward, he looked at where he dropped the rag in the sink. "You should stay away from me," he said quietly.

Naruto's voice was just as quiet. "I don't want to."

"I'm not good for you. And I'm not friendship material. I don't want a friend." He lifted his head enough to meet Naruto's eyes in the mirror. "I'm going to keep hurting you. Maybe not like that, but I will."

"I can decide when I've had enough, or what's too much for me," Naruto said thickly. The stare, as well as Sasuke speaking so frankly, had a heavy feeling of longing sitting in his guts. "Don't leave…" _Me. Don't leave me again. _

Sasuke could see the plea in those blue eyes. Several seconds passed as the eye contact held.

It never ceased to amaze him how tough Naruto could be, while managing to be so vulnerable. He only allowed Sasuke to push him so far, and yet… and yet he could stand there with his heart in his eyes, or speak his feelings no matter how private they were. That old interest he'd felt when first laying eyes on Naruto, the kick in his gut that had come at seeing Naruto's irate face, came back tenfold, making him clutch the edge of the sink. And still Naruto stared into him.

Sasuke broke the eye contact with an exhalation, and wearily shook his head. "Said I don't want a friend."

"Then I won't be your friend."

"How's that work?"

Naruto thought. "However you want it to."

Sasuke turned and divided the clothes he'd brought. Threw Naruto a fresh pair of jeans and a T-shirt. "Doesn't matter. Don't plan on seeing you again after tonight anyway."

* * *

They were changed a few minutes later, and parked side by side on the couch. Itachi sat on the coffee table, facing them. His eyes were flat, arms crossed. "Bullshit."

"It's true," Sasuke shrugged.

"You two fell down a hill."

"Yup."

"Over a broken beer bottle."

"Yup."

"Where?"

"At…the park."

Itachi studied Sasuke's carefully blank face, and Naruto's lowered eyes. "And what are you doing with him?" He nodded at Naruto. "Thought you'd written the home off?"

Sasuke seemed to come up blank on that one. He could think of no good reason why he'd be with Naruto after doing away with the community service.

Naruto gamely tried to do his part in the cover up. "Neji brought me to the park. He's always taking me there. I met Sasuke, and we…uh…fell down."

Now focused completely on Naruto, having recognized him as the weak link, Itachi raised a brow. "Oh? And where's this Neji now?"

"He…um…" Naruto shot Sasuke a beseeching glance for help.

But Sasuke was remembering that Neji's cousin worked at the home. And that at some point that hag would discover her cousin had been shot, hit by a speeding car, and had undergone brain surgery. Naruto's name would eventually come up, at which time Sasuke's name would as well. Iruka would be at his door soon after that, giving Itachi an earful. He had no doubt that his brother would somehow discover the police report in Oto not long after. Itachi would most likely proceed to open his guts, yank out his organs, and feed them to him. Slowly.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!_

"I got in some trouble," Sasuke admitted in a low voice. "Naruto bailed me out. Neji bailed us _both_ out, and kind of…got hurt in the process. He's in the hospital."

Itachi listened to this in silence, staring hard into Sasuke's eyes the entire time. Apparently he concluded that he was being handed the truth; he took a deep breath and nodded.

-oOo-

Without another word, he reached behind himself and took out a first aid kit, one he'd put together himself and kept in the house. As such, it had more than a standard first aid kit contained. Deciding that Naruto's cut was more immediate, he went to work on him first, and sutured his cut with fine, precise stitches.

Naruto sat perfectly still, Itachi noticed. He neither flinched, nor winced whenever the needle bit into his skin, and thanked him once the bandage was in place.

Sasuke, on the other hand, whined and cursed when his hand was seen to. Itachi took perverse pleasure in his brother's discomfort (and drew the process out because of it), but snuck peeks at Naruto while he worked. Kid seemed a steady sort. Steady personality. Obviously not used to lying. The complete opposite of Sasuke, and stuck to his beast of a brother besides. Bailed Sasuke out of trouble? Itachi resisted the urge to snort. He could only imagine what had gone on tonight. Sasuke did not run in kosher circles. And someone was in the hospital.

He looked up to ask Sasuke if Naruto would be staying over, and got a good look at the temple wound. A lock of hair had hidden it from view before, but now he reached out to push the hair aside. Sasuke tried to jerk his head away, but Itachi tightened his hand in the hair and held his head still. "That looks like a bullet wound. Those are powder burns…" he met Sasuke's belligerent eyes slowly. A glance at Naruto only confirmed what he was seeing, and a knot of terror cramped his body "You were _shot_ at?"

"No," Sasuke said, trying to get up now.

Itachi shoved him back down, nearly shouting. "I know gunshot wounds when I see them, Sasuke, don't tell me-"

"Nothing happened!"

"Except that bullet would have gone into your head if I hadn't shown up," Naruto mumbled quietly.

They both looked at him. Naruto calmly looked back.

Itachi felt the beginnings of an anxiety attack trying to take over. His throat closed, he felt short of breath; it was his worst fear, that something would happen to Sasuke. He knew his brother walked on the dangerous side of things, but _guns_? _Bullets_?

The worst part of it was that he couldn't change Sasuke. The kid might be afraid of bringing his danger home, but Sasuke could and would leave whenever he felt Itachi was encroaching on his space, or even if he just felt like immersing himself completely in whatever he did when he was alone. He looked at his brother now and knew he would end up dead one day soon. Knew as well as he knew his name, and that there was nothing he could do about it. He probably wouldn't even know when it happened. His brother would be off God knew where, doing God knew what. Getting shot at.

* * *

Naruto watched the way Sasuke interacted with his brother in fascination. Just like any other person who'd never had a family, he was indecently curious about how blood relatives did relate to each other. For his part, he thought he'd treat a family the way he would treat a friend. He'd cherish them, love them, respect them, and be loyal to the very end. He would never do anything to cause his family worry, anger, or grief.

That was a far cry from what he was seeing, though, much as Sasuke himself was very different form any friend he'd ever imagined. He recalled Sasuke saying his brother was an asshole, but Naruto could see no shred of assholery in the man. The way Itachi closed his mouth now over further protests, and the way he lowered his red face over Sasuke's hands to resume the stitches, it all spoke of the way Naruto himself would be with a brother. Especially when Itachi's shoulders shook in spite of his attempts to keep still. And when his face reddened further, and two fat tears plopped onto Sasuke's palm, Naruto thought maybe, just maybe, Sasuke was wrong about his brother.

He watched as Itachi turned his head aside sharply. It looked as though he would leave the hand half stitched, but he seemed to master himself, albeit with an effort, and turned to his brother once more. A glance at Sasuke's face showed him very aware of the tears, which Naruto thought very interesting. Sasuke sat stiffly, as if ready to bolt as soon as his brother was done. He did actually move to slide off the couch when the sutures were bandaged, but Itachi pushed him back with a hand, then grabbed his hair hard in one hand. Using his other, he roughly scrubbed at the shallow bullet wound with gauze and alcohol, making Sasuke's face screw up in a grimace of pain. Naruto waited to hear Sasuke's yowls again, but it seemed that witnessing Itachi's tears on his behalf had done the job of shaming him sufficiently. He withstood the rest of his treatment in silence, jaws clenched tightly shut as Itachi taped another bandage in place and shoved him away once more.

Sasuke rocked forward, gingerly held his head in his hands, and cursed very quietly. Itachi put his first aid kit to rights. After slamming it shut, he went to a room Naruto hadn't noticed before and slammed that door shut as well. He didn't come out again. When Sasuke finally lifted his head, Naruto saw that his eyes were red and watery. Probably from pain. He'd winced himself when seeing the way Itachi scrubbed at that cut.

* * *

By the time they strolled up to the home, every light in the place was blazing. Naruto lifted his hand to knock at the same moment that the curtains at one of the windows to the right of the door jerked aside. There was a muffled shriek, then the door was yanked open. Iruka and Hinata stood there, with several of the older children watching from farther back.

Naruto opened his mouth, but Sasuke stepped forward. Iruka came out and stood toe to toe with him, eyes furious. His face was pale with rage beneath its bronze complexion. "It is nearly five in the morning. Where is Neji?" he said hoarsely. "He was the one who escorted Naruto out of here. Hinata and I have been _sick_ with worry. Neji isn't answering his phone, and clearly Naruto is with you so _where is he_?"

Glancing briefly at Hinata's tear-streaked face, Sasuke considered his response. The only thing he cared about was Naruto not getting in trouble, or being blamed for anything that happened tonight. If he had to vilify Neji to do this, that was fine by him. As far as he was concerned Neji should never have taken Naruto to Oto.

His account of events might have been different from the truth somewhat, but for all intents and purposes it followed what happened; Neji had taken Naruto to Oto, where Sasuke happened to be. Some trouble had transpired, through no fault of Naruto's, and people had gotten hurt. Iruka's eyes flew to the bandages and blood he and Naruto wore, as if seeing them for the first time, but then he had his hands full catching a collapsing Hinata. At hearing her cousin was so critically wounded, whatever fortitude she had vanished. She sobbed openly in Iruka's arms, unable to even stand. He was forced to drag her into the home, leaving Sasuke and Naruto on the stoop. Sasuke, grateful for the brief respite, reached forward, closed the door, then pulled Naruto down the walk by a handful of his shirt. When they were a few yards away from the door, he turned to him.

They hadn't spoken on the long walk to the home. He was occupied with his thoughts, and Naruto seemed content to leave him alone. Now he looked into the blue eyes, feeling that same weird kick and hating it. "Don't contradict what I said to him," he told Naruto. "Neji's not going to get too much heat. People will be all sympathetic to him and show him pity. He can handle shouldering the blame for taking you to Oto, which he _should_ own up to, but I'm not sure what Iruka would do to you if it came out that you made Neji take you. So just keep your mouth shut, deal?"

"Deal."

"What _did_ you say to make Neji take you there?"

"Oh." Naruto had the grace to look uncomfortable, as he dropped his eyes. "He wants to fuck me. Said I'd think about it. If he got me to see you."

Sasuke stared at Naruto for a long time, as something hot and ugly snarled to life in him. His face was unreadable.

"When will I see you again?"

Thinking how unpleasant being around Naruto was getting, Sasuke turned for the sidewalk with a shrug. He began walking home, hands in his pockets. "Never."

"But-"

"Get a life."


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I may have missed replying to a few reviews. I get confused when I don't reply right away, forgetting which ones I already replied to and which ones I haven't. Apologies.

* * *

Chapter 7

He felt awful all the way home. Unlocking his door to find his brother waiting _again_ didn't help. If he had to endure any more guilt he thought he'd just go crazy. Between Naruto and his all-encompassing acceptance, and his brother's tears, and Neji, and everything, he really didn't think he could take anymore.

Itachi stood up at seeing him enter, seemed to debate commenting on his presence, then just went back to his room and shut the door hard.

And that was the final straw, Sasuke decided.

His brother worrying about him till he couldn't even leave the house now without the guy waiting to see if he came back did the job of putting him over the edge. For a moment, he sagged where he stood, leaning his hands on his knees, before turning right around and leaving the apartment again.

* * *

Naruto was sound asleep when he felt someone shake his shoulder. Coming off a sleepless night, one that had been fraught with adrenaline and quite a few scares, he only muttered for the person to go away. The hand remained on him. It shook him with increasing insistence, until he finally pried his eyes open and looked over his shoulder. He was wide awake instantly. "Sasuke?"

Sasuke's face held steady for a moment, then crumpled before his eyes.

Naruto scrambled to his knees, but Sasuke was already sliding down the wall to sit. He had one hand clamped over his mouth, the other arm thrown over his face. His head rested on his drawn up knees as he cried. Really cried this time, not like in the convenience store.

Shocked beyond words, Naruto crawled over and sat beside him. Didn't touch him. Didn't say anything. Just sat with him and waited, trying to force his mind into some kind of working order; obviously something had happened that he'd missed. He didn't have a watch or anything, but going by how the sky was turning pink it couldn't be more than ninety minutes since Sasuke had told him to get a life. What could have happened between then and now?

Sasuke didn't enlighten him. He cried harshly for a good thirty minutes at least, without picking his head up. Naruto swallowed. A hundred questions tried to burst free of him, but somehow he knew that Sasuke would leave if he acknowledged what was happening in anyway. He had only to touch the bandage on his neck to remember how Sasuke felt about his previous lapse.

Finally, when the sobbing tapered down to sniffles, and the sniffles to the occasional hiccup, Sasuke scooted down completely and turned on his side.

Naruto looked around his tree house. He supposed Sasuke could sleep up here. He wasn't sure how Iruka would feel about it, but then Iruka never came to wake him up in the mornings. Most likely Hinata would be taking a few days off to see about her cousin, which would mean Iruka would have his hands full with the home. Naruto _would_ be expected to pitch in… A glance at where Sasuke lay snoring softly, firmed Naruto's already unwavering devotion to him. The home was Iruka's business; Sasuke was his. He'd let him stay, and help him as much as he could, with whatever had driven him here.

_He came to me, _Naruto thought as he lay down beside Sasuke. _Me. He's hurting over something and he came to _me_. _

Periodically over the years, some of the smaller kids had shared a bed with him. For added heat, because of a nightmare, or for whatever reason. Naruto had viewed them as warm little balls, something not precisely unpleasant but not too fun either. The little kids slept wildly, and usually wet the bed. Laying himself beside Sasuke was nothing like that. For one, he felt a great deal more for Sasuke than he did for the kids of the home. For another, he never let kids into his tree house. He was very aware of sharing something private with Sasuke just then; something more than their initial visit, when Sasuke had been up here the first time. This was like the convenience store…sort of.

Too sleepy to puzzle it out, Naruto closed his eyes.

* * *

Off and on as he slept, Naruto was aware of sound. Kids playing in the yard, his name being called once or twice. He had a hazy memory of Iruka's worried face leaning over him, and food being mentioned, and then nothing. When he finally woke up, it was dark outside. Sasuke was already awake and sitting in his tree house window.

The window was large, taking up nearly one whole wall. The ledge was wide enough to sit on, with a cross bar halfway up that allowed one to lean their mid-section on it if they were sitting on the window ledge, as Sasuke was. His legs dangled outside the tree house as he stared upward. Not much could be seen from the window, but leaves and the backyard below.

Nothing was said as Naruto climbed up beside him. He slouched against the cross bar with a yawn, and crossed his arms so that his hands came up and grabbed the bar beneath his chin. A few times, he risked a peek in Sasuke's direction. Sasuke's face seemed pensive, as if he were thinking hard about something. Then he realized that Sasuke could see the moon through the leaves. When he turned to look up at it as well, he saw that it was full. He was idly staring at the craters, counting them, when Sasuke's voice floated to him on the summer breeze:

"I killed my parents."

Naruto was glad of the cross bar holding him up. He didn't dare move or comment. Hardly dared to breathe, as a cold shiver passed over his skin. He had the presence of mind to know that Sasuke was confiding in him, telling him something from deep within himself, and so kept his eyes on the moon. Maybe, if he was very quiet, and very still, he would learn just why Sasuke was the way he was.

-oOo-

The silence encouraged Sasuke, who'd glanced aside to find nothing but distant interest on Naruto's face. No shock or disgust. Just those blue eyes glittering with moonlight as they stared upward. Even so, his nerve failed him. He sat swallowing and quivering, also gazing heavenward, for what seemed like an eternity. Several times, he felt as if the words were there, ready to be spoken after ten long years, only to have them dry up the moment he opened his mouth.

He just couldn't do it.

As if sensing his difficulty, Naruto's hand dropped to the space separating their hips, and wormed its way into his. It was as sweaty as his own hand was. He returned the panicky squeeze Naruto gave, and just held it without looking at him. The contact signified that Naruto's friendship was still his. That it hadn't buckled beneath the weight of the revelation. That he could continue, and get the tale out, and the hand would still be there. For this Sasuke was absurdly grateful.

"It was a burglary," he said some time later. "Itachi and I came home and found the place wrecked, and our parents hurt. On the floor. Itachi told me to stay with them while he went for help, but I…I thought I could help them myself. They'd been shot. Entry wounds seemed straight-forward enough, and they were still alive…BPs were holding steady, so I-"

He had to swallow and bear down against the surge of guilt.

"But I messed up. I was seven, and it was the living room floor instead of an operating room, and I messed up. Killed them. They'd have been fine if I'd just waited for Itachi to come back with help. _I killed them_."

Naruto's hand held on tightly, squeezing hard as fresh tears left hot little trails on his cheeks.

It was a long while before he could go on. Many minutes, where the sound of his hitched breathing and wet sniffles were all that were heard. A glance showed Naruto's eyes to be downcast now, staring at the ground in attentive silence. Waiting for him to go on.

"Both my parents were doctors, you know. Mom was in Peds, and Dad…he was in Cardio. I was their prodigy, they said. Their genius kid." Sasuke felt a blush heating his cheeks, but pressed on. "I'm…smart. Like, freakishly smart. Photographic memory. I wanted to be a surgeon. They used to take me up to the hospital with them all the time, and I'd get to spend hours in the library while they worked. Mom said I should be in school, but Dad said that _was_ my school. At night, my bedtime stories consisted of them pretending to be patients. They'd recite their symptoms and I'd diagnose them. Sometimes…sometimes Dad let me watch surgeries. More often, he or mom let me work on cadavers or practice the basics on them. Drawing blood, putting in a central line, suturing. That sort of thing. Once the director found out about me, he started this program at the hospital for gifted children, one that singled out medically inclined individuals. There was only one other kid in the program. Girl named Sakura. My age. We had to take exams, though, and go to med school before we'd be allowed to actually operate. When…I was studying for my MCATs when my parents…"

Another period of silence fell between them.

Sasuke cleared his throat. "The director blamed me for the loss of his two best doctors. Said children shouldn't be practicing medicine anyway. Shut the program down. Don't know what became of the girl, but I heard whispers at the funeral. All those doctors. Looking at me from behind their hands. Saying how I'd killed my parents. Itachi was the only one who stood by me. We had an uncle come to stay with us afterward, but he thought I'd killed them too, I could see it in his eyes whenever _he_ looked at me. He was right. They all were. I was smart, but I was cocky. I was _seven_. And I killed them."

Naruto's hand shifted on his, but didn't let go. Their hands were so wet now that sweat squelched between their palms, but Naruto's grip was steely. Sasuke went on.

"Itachi had my back, but I gave it all up. Medicine, studying, everything. Know what he said to me?" Sasuke didn't wait for an answer. "He said, 'Well, if you won't pursue your dream, I'll pursue it for you.' He's been studying medicine ever since. He's hopeless at it, too. God…I hated him for that, for being so good to me. For not blaming me. I _deserved_ to be blamed. It was…it was…"

Words finally failed him, but Naruto picked up the tale. "It was the only thing that made your guilt bearable," he said in a low voice.

Sasuke nodded. "But he never blamed me. Never. Always been there for me, and I _hate_ him for that. Then he sent me to school, and I hated him even more. He's the whole reason I started cutting classes and staying out at night." Sasuke took a breath. "You want to know the reason I came to this stupid place? This home? Because he finally gave up on me. Told me to go and stay gone. It's his fault I'm-"

"No, it's not."

Sasuke looked at him sharply, before a sneer contorted his face. "Oh, so now you're an expert? Huh? You think you-"

"I _think_," Naruto said slowly, "that you started being an asshole in an effort to shoulder the guilt. Hurting people makes your own hurt go away. And you think you're a bad person, so you stopped _trying_ to be good. It's easier for you. Easier than facing what happened. It's easier for you to wallow in self-pity than actually move on and make something of yourself."

Sasuke snatched his hand free. "This the part where you tell me it wasn't my fault? That I didn't kill them?"

Naruto thought for a long time, staring at where his bare feet swung slowly back and forth. "There's a lot of ugly in the world. I may not get out much, but I know that. I see. I listen. A hospital has to be one of those places where most of the ugliness lives. I can imagine docs doing their best to save people and sometimes failing. Or people going there for help, hoping to get better, and dying anyway. Medicine has to be one of the few places where all the unfairness in the world just gathers and piles up." He turned his head so that his cheek rested on the cross bar. Facing Sasuke, but not looking at him. "You're a doctor. A healer. It's not what you do, it's who you are. In your blood. You helped me when you didn't even like me, and you helped those thugs in Oto after they tried to kill us. It's _who you are_. And if that's the case, then I have to believe you know, on some level, that people just…die. No matter how much skill a doc has, or if the procedure is routine, people just die. And if you know that, then I don't have to tell you it's not your fault. You already know. Maybe you should have waited for your brother to come back, and maybe they did die on your watch. Doesn't mean you killed them. My mom died having me, but I didn't kill her."

Now the blue eyes found his and held there. Sasuke couldn't look away.

"You know something?" Naruto went on after some minutes. "You are the most fucked up person I have ever known. I've seen some real jerks volunteer at the home, but you're the worst. The absolute worst… And you saved those guys' lives tonight. You saved the people who shot at us. Saved Neji's life. Sasuke… it gives. Me. Chills… to think what you could be like on a good day. To know what you could accomplish if you'd just get out of your own way long enough to see yourself the way I do. Gives me chills." He shook his head at the end of this, stretched, and stood up.

Sasuke had to swallow several times before his dry mouth was capable of speech. "Where you going?"

"Food. I'm starving." Naruto stepped up onto the cross bar, then casually stepped out into the air. Sasuke watched him do a lazy somersault that landed him neatly on both feet. "You coming?" Naruto called up.

* * *

The residents of the home were sound asleep. Sasuke saw by a dusty clock on the wall that it was nearing midnight. In the kitchen, Naruto found two chipped bowls and a half-eaten box of Frosted Flakes. He poured for them both, drowned their cereal in milk, and produced to plastic spoons.

For a while, they only ate. Sasuke kept sneaking peaks at Naruto, trying to gauge if he'd meant his words or if he was bluffing. Naruto seemed intent on his cereal, though. Not as if he'd just heard the deepest darkest secret of Sasuke's life. Neither did he seem particularly enthralled with Sasuke, the way his 'give me chills' statement suggested. Seemed like things were business as usual for Naruto, and the business at hand was another bowl of flakes.

Sasuke cleared his throat, suddenly unable to stand the quiet. "Today was my first day of summer school. Blew it, I guess."

Naruto looked up, milk dribbling from his chin. "Summer school? I saw on TV that's for people like m…uh, people who aren't too bright. What do _you_ need it for?"

Sasuke told how he never went to class if he could help it. "But I want to be free of this place. Itachi told me to go, and I'm going. Can't have juvie on my ass or the Academy sniffing at my heels. I want to make a clean break, have my shit in order. So I have to make up the work in order to get my damn diploma, even though I passed all my finals."

"Oh. But…that should be easy for you, right?"

"It is," Sasuke hedged, not quite able to believe they were speaking about something so ordinary as summer school after what he'd revealed. "But there are only so many hours in the day. The amount of work they're giving me, I'll be lucky if I have time to take a shit. I know I'll be failing at least two classes. P.E. and Math."

"What's P.E.?"

"Physical Education. Gym class."

Naruto snorted a laugh and ended up choking. "Dude," he wheezed. "How can you fail something like that?"

"By not being athletically inclined. I can't even pass a ball."

Naruto stared at him. "And Math? What about your photographic memory? Don't doctors have to be good at Math?"

"My memory doesn't help. I just don't _get_ math. Me and numbers don't mix. They don't make sense."

Shaking his head, Naruto slurped the last of the milk in his bowl. "Numbers are the only thing that make sense."

Finally unable to take the suspense anymore, Sasuke set his own bowl down hard and pinned Naruto with an unblinking stare. "Look, I have to know."

"Know what?"

"If what I said out there…what you said…I mean-"

Naruto gave an odd half-smile. "What. If I still want to be your friend?"

Sasuke nodded, face reddening.

"Well," Naruto said, frowning as if the question were of the utmost importance. "Seems to me like you said you don't want a friend. Come to think of it…didn't you tell me to get a life?" He got up to wash his bowl at the sink, giving Sasuke his back.

_Fuck. _"Yeah, I did say that, but-"

"You also said I make you sick. Matter of fact, every time I try to get close to you, you push me away."

Sasuke drummed his fingers on the table top, thinking. "Well, I…things are different now."

"They are?" Naruto reached over and snagged Sasuke's bowl to set it in the sink. "How so?"

"I mean I came back, didn't I? Shared and all that?" He watched Naruto rinsing his bowl and setting it in the drain board beside the other one. "You think I'd have told just anybody all that?"

Naruto shut the faucet off and leaned his hands on the sink. "So what are you saying?"

"Huh? Nothing." Sasuke abruptly got up to leave, now mortified on top of everything else. "Forget I said anything."

"You really are dumb, but at least now I know why. You've never had a friend. Probably don't even know how to be normal."

Sasuke swung back and found Naruto leaning his ass against the sink, arms crossed. "What-!"

"You think I'd tell someone what you told me?" Naruto straightened and began walking toward him. "If I'm not going to tell how you stabbed some guy, or cried, or saved fifty people tonight, I'm not going to tell your private business. I don't care _what_ you tell me," Naruto said as he bumped Sasuke's chest with his own. "I'm not letting you go." They were nose to nose for a second, before Naruto shoved again with his body, this time pushing Sasuke out of the way so he could walk past him and go back out to the tree house. He held the screen door open for Sasuke to follow. "Looks like you're stuck with me as a friend whether you like it or not."

To his dismay, Sasuke needed several seconds to recover from that brief, but lightning hot contact with Naruto's body. The touch had been like shoving a fork into an electrical outlet; sizzling and completely unexpected.

-oOo-

At the tree house, he and Naruto stretched out on the floor once more. "You, uh…mind if I hang here for a few days?" Sasuke asked after awhile. "Don't feel like going home."

"Not at all. Iruka might, though. And your brother."

But Sasuke thought he could handle Iruka. Itachi was another matter, but whatever. Feeling oddly content of a sudden, Sasuke let himself drift to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

The next morning, Sasuke was a flurry of motion. "Gotta get down to the community center, where they're holding summer school, sit through four hours, then I'll be back here," he said as he sat lacing up his sneakers. "You can help me with the math."

Naruto crawled to the ladder to watch Sasuke's wobbly descent. "What should I tell Iruka?"

"Nothing. I'll talk to him on my way out."

"Okay. Sasuke?"

Sasuke stopped his unsteady decent and looked up.

"I'm glad you came back."

A sudden, unbelievably gorgeous smile transformed Sasuke's normally sulky face to one of striking handsomeness. "Yeah...me too. I mean whatever." He was gone a moment later.

Naruto remained where he was, stunned. Just stunned. He'd never seen Sasuke smile before, and now that he had…

Slowly, he crawled to the wall and sat, leaning against it. Unable to quite believe it, he put a shaky hand over where his heart was thudding along in happy amazement. _His brother's hot, but... _"Whew," he said in awe. A nervous laugh escaped him, as he sat replaying the smile over and over.

* * *

Sasuke was having similar difficulty. He sat with the ten or so other High Schoolers taking summer school, most of whom were thick-necked jocks or hormonally challenged girls. He had a tiny portion of his mind directed at his Science teacher, who was teaching this course, but most of his focus was on last night. Most specifically, the part of the evening that had taken place in the kitchen. Sitting at the very back the way he was, elbows on his desk, hands clasped before his mouth, Sasuke relived every word.

All right, if he was honest with himself, he was only really interested in the last bit at the end, before they'd gone back to the tree house.

_Naruto bumping his chest. "I'm not letting you go."_

That. That right there.

He must have replayed those few seconds a thousand times since waking up this morning. He'd had to get his ass out the tree house before his boner was noticeable, and now…now his body went through a heat wave as he relived that chest-bump for the umpteenth time.

As his teacher began making her rounds between the desks, handing out that day's work, Sasuke clenched his teeth hard. He finally looked at something that had been sitting in his head pretty much since his night at the home.

He wanted to fuck Naruto.

No, that wasn't quite right. He could admit that he wanted more than that from Naruto, he just wasn't quite sure what else-

"_Well_, Mr. Uchiha." His teacher stopped beside his desk, and gave a satisfied smirk. "If you hadn't passed your other exams with such flying colors, thereby demonstrating what _I_ always knew, which was that you have an exceptionally sharp-"

"Bitch, just give me my work and step the fuck on," he grated. He didn't appreciate his thoughts being interrupted, and especially couldn't stand this hag.

Face tightening with frigid insult, she dropped a stack of papers at least a foot high on his desk, and marched away to the sniggers of the rest of the class. Leafing through it quickly, he saw that yesterday's work was included. Forcibly putting thoughts of Naruto out of his mind, he began with yesterday's load first.

He did check his watch, though, to see how long he had before he could be back at the home.

About twenty minutes into it, he noticed the lug to his left sneaking peeks at his paper. Sasuke glanced up to make sure his teacher had her nose safely buried in her novel, before he slipped his knife from his sleeve far enough for the kid to see.

Kid got the point.

* * *

Naruto found that helping Iruka out that day wasn't half as loathsome as it usually was. He had the knowledge that Sasuke would be back to get him through several screaming hours of noisy kids and endless requests for piggyback rides, before a knock on the front door sounded sometime around mid-afternoon. He was yanking the thing open a moment later, and there it was, the smile he hadn't stopped seeing since that morning.

It wasn't as wide as before, or as unselfconscious, but it was still there. Sasuke seemed to become aware of the fact that he was returning Naruto's wild grin, and schooled his face to its more usual lines. Naruto wasn't put off a bit. "You're back." His eyes dropped to the huge bag of take out. "And you brought food. I think I love you."

Sasuke used the excuse of ducking into the place to hide his embarrassment. Honestly, jerk acted like he'd never seen food sometimes. "I'd have been back sooner, but I detoured home to get my math books. Thank God my bro was out at the time. Avoided a scene."

Naruto looked outside and found the books, a good seven of them, stacked beside the door. He hefted them in one hand, and led the way out to the tree house.

-oOo-

Once there, Sasuke distributed the food first thing. Burgers, fries, onion rings, nuggets, and soda galore. "Wasn't sure what you liked," he began.

"I had half a Pop-Tart this morning," Naruto groaned, wolfing into the first burger he could lay hands on. "I'll eat anything."

"Least you ate. I didn't have anything," Sasuke admitted. "And my head is killing me. Didn't even make a dent in my assignments."

"That hard?"

"Long hand," Sasuke corrected him. "Stupidly left my laptop at home before class today. I can type ten times as fast as I can write. I got it now, though." He thrust his chin at where his bag sat.

Naruto eyed Sasuke's bulging bag as they ate. "Looks like a lot of work."

"Oh." Sasuke put down his burger, and wiped his hands. "Before I forget, hand me that Algebra book behind you."

Naruto pretended not to hear.

"Dude? The book?"

Forced to, Naruto glanced behind himself. He could see the seven books, and spent some time staring at them, before he took the second one from the bottom, and handed it over without looking at Sasuke.

Sasuke took it, looked at it, then looked at Naruto's downcast eyes. Naruto was staring intently at his burger, chewing with concentration. Something niggled Sasuke's memory. "This is Geometry. I said Algebra."

"I'm eating."

"It's right behind you."

Naruto slurped long and hard from his soda.

Sasuke set the book down. Without looking up at Naruto, he said, "That night I came here. The first time. I wrote some shit about you on that first assessment form. You acted like it didn't bother you, but you didn't read it, did you. You can't read?"

Naruto's face didn't change, but it did go very red as he refused to look at Sasuke. Then he suddenly threw his burger as hard as he could, narrowly missing Sasuke's head, and stormed to the window. He leaned on the crossbar, his entire body tense with anger.

Sasuke remained where he was. This so wasn't his scene. Being supportive, saying encouraging things, smoothing ruffled feathers. Not his deal. He calmly took a fry and dipped it in ketchup. Ate it. Bit into a chicken nugget, and stared thoughtfully at his teeth marks. Sipped his soda. Reached for an onion ring. The soda again. Another fry.

Naruto turned and glared at him warily. "What, no wisecracks?"

"You still good at math?"

"I guess?" Naruto shrugged impatiently. Sasuke looked like he couldn't care less, something that went a long way toward diffusing his sudden panic at being ridiculed.

"Then we're in business. Algebra book's that red one. No, the other red one, the Algebra I book."

Naruto took it, opened it, and snorted. "The hell's this? I don't know this shit."

Sasuke jerked his head up, food forgotten. "What?" He got to his feet quickly and came over. "No, you _have_ to know that, I'm counting on it! Test's next week, man! You said you had this shit on lock!"

Naruto shrugged helplessly, gazing down at the pages. "I said numbers made sense, not that I knew this stuff!"

"Iruka said you were good at math!" Sasuke pushed both hands through his hair, turning away from Naruto a minute. He swung back immediately. "Dude, please. Okay? I'm begging."

Naruto's eyes were wide, but he shook his head. "I'm sorry…I mean I do know some math."

"What's the square root of 815?"

"What's a square root?"

"Fuck, Naruto! What the actual fuck _do_ you know about math?"

"Um, the basics? Addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division? I never went beyond a certain point."

Sasuke nearly screamed, but took a deep breath instead. "Fine. Okay uh…eleven times eleven?"

"121. Easy."

Sasuke had no idea if that answer was correct. "Oh? How about…121 times 121?"

Naruto didn't even hesitate. "14,641."

"And…that number times itself? Divided by 13?"

Naruto was answering almost before Sasuke stopped speaking. "16,489,144."

Sasuke went to his stack of math books and selected the thinnest one. He flipped to the beginning. "This is my remedial math book, messes with the basics. The first section deals with reviewing the stuff you said, before heading into fractions and shit. Here. Look at this. You understand this?"

Naruto looked at the page Sasuke held up in front of him. By focusing on the sample problems instead of the written explanation, he was able to work out what he was seeing. "Yes."

Sasuke slowly turned the page. "How about that?"

Naruto took the book and flipped the pages himself. On every other one, a new lesson was explained, with both a written example and a math problem. Sometimes several problems, as each step of a process was carried out. Before long he was immersed in the numbers, Sasuke forgotten.

Breathing a sigh of cautious hope, Sasuke stacked the textbooks next to where Naruto slid down, in order of discipline and difficulty. He then went to his book bag, took out his laptop, and began the first of half a dozen essays.

-oOo-

The food was cold, but that didn't stop either boy from returning to it periodically over the next several hours. Sasuke was sweating through a Chem paper when Naruto looked up and said, "Ah. Now I know what a square root is. The square root of 815 is 28.5482048472, in case you still wanted to know."

Sasuke just shook his head and snorted. He did note that Naruto had finished with both Algebra books, though. _Fucking genius in his own right._

-oOo-_  
_

Finally, when it was just past midnight, Sasuke threw his pen down with a groan and shoved the heels of his hands into his eyes. His laptop's battery had died hours ago; he was back to writing his papers long hand, and his forearm was killing him. "I'm done for tonight."

"Me too." Naruto closed the Calculus textbook with a sigh. "My brain's fried, man."

Sasuke crawled over to him. "Huh. Least you're _done_ done. I got two months of this to look forward to."

Naruto turned his pounding head to look at him. "Does that mean you'll be studying here for those two months?"

Sasuke suddenly had no interest in his aches and pains. It was just him and Naruto, and the shadowy interior of the tree house.

'_I'm not letting you go.'_

"I don't know," Sasuke mumbled. "You mind?" When Naruto didn't answer, he turned to look at him. There was a small frown between the blue eyes. "What?"

"You already know I don't mind. You sleeping here that long too?"

Sasuke thought about it. "Probably not. We're both wearing the same clothes we changed into at my place. I could do with a new set."

The conversation fizzled. Exhausted as they were, they sat there against the wall, side by side, just gazing sleepily into each other's eyes.

Without meaning to, Sasuke let his stare fall to Naruto's mouth. When he met his eyes again, it was to find Naruto looking at _his_ mouth. Sasuke hesitated. He sat there silently telling himself to man up, to do it, just do it, but then Naruto looked away with a shaky little laugh. The moment was lost, and Sasuke was able to look away himself, more than a little relieved.

Naruto was no trickin' twink down in Oto, he told himself. He could admit that he'd never been in this kind of situation before. Just jumping Naruto's bones probably wasn't the best way to go, but then what _did_ one do? Ask them out? Sasuke had to refrain from snorting. He didn't date. Ever. Did not do that whole boyfriend scene. When he wanted to fuck, he fucked. End of story.

* * *

The next day was the same, down to Sasuke showing up early in the afternoon with bags of take out, only this time he had the charger for his laptop.

They worked in the home's kitchen this time, so Sasuke could use the wall outlet to keep his laptop powered. After they'd eaten, and before Sasuke got lost in his assignments, Naruto intended to give him a refresher course on math, Uzumaki style. Iruka found a battered whiteboard for them to use, and a few dry erase markers. This was propped up on the counter.

"Right," Naruto said. "Just so I have an idea of what's going on in your head, how much is nine plus seven?"

Sasuke's face could only be described as 'deer in headlights.' Naruto saw his mouth moving slightly as he tried to solve the problem mentally. He waited.

"Fourteen?"

"Try again."

This time Naruto caught the finger movement beneath the table. Sasuke was counting.

"Eighteen?"

Naruto turned toward the whiteboard. "Why don't you do one of your assignments. I need to write a few things down."

"Uh, yeah. Cool." Sasuke reached for his laptop gratefully, arming sweat off his brow as he did.

Iruka peeked into the kitchen once, and asked if they needed anything. Neither boy replied beyond a grunt. He stood in the doorway a moment, watching the intent look of concentration on Naruto's face as he scribbled on the board, and the equally focused attention Sasuke gave his screen. _What do you know...Kid surprised me after all. And changed Naruto completely. _He'd never seen Naruto so full of purpose. Shaking his head, he quietly left them alone.

-oOo-

"All right, look here," Naruto said a couple of hours later.

Sasuke saved what he was doing, closed his laptop, and smoothed his hands nervously onto his jeans. He had to squint at the whiteboard. "What's all that?"

The whiteboard had been divided into four columns. Each column was packed with tiny writing. "These are facts for the four basics. Adding, subtracting, multiplying, and dividing. Memorize them."

"…What?"

Naruto gestured at Sasuke. "You can't even add. You're getting hung up on quantities. These are the basic facts, so memorize them, without thinking about _how_ the answers work. Once you have these in your head, and you learn a few procedures, the brain will hopefully take over and do the rest."

"But…" Sasuke understood nothing. "I don't get it."

Naruto wondered if this was how his teachers felt every time they tried to teach him how to read. He could not understand how words worked to save his life. Gritting his teeth a moment, he gave a tight smile. "Memorize. What's on. The fucking. _Board_. Do you understand _that_?"

Skeptical, Sasuke got up and came to the board, running his eyes over each column once, then again. "Okay…now what?"

Naruto was impressed. "Dude, that's it? You know it that quick?"

"No…but it's in my head."

"So you know it?"

It was Sasuke's turn to lose patience. "Yeah, okay, if that works for you. I know it."

"Nine plus seven?"

Sasuke blinked, but didn't look at the board. "Sixteen."

"Sweet," Naruto grinned. "Let me show you what happens when we add zeros in the mix…"

-oOo-

For the next few hours, Sasuke suffered through a math lesson that wrung his formidable brain dry, but that was nonetheless entertaining. Naruto used odd scenarios or objects to illustrate the steps of math procedures. Sasuke took notes, and asked question after question, but by ten he was cautiously solving a simple algebraic equation. When he was done, he sat back and stared at his handiwork, eyes nearly shining with pride. "Holy shit, I did it. I actually did it. Is it right?"

"You can check it yourself, the way I showed you."

"Man that'll take too long, just tell me."

"It's right."

Sasuke let out a hoot of triumph and relief, sliding down in his chair until Naruto reached out and caught him with a laugh.

"Okay, one more paper, then I'm calling it a night," Sasuke said when he'd straightened up. "I owe you big time."

"Seriously, don't mention it. We haven't even hit the hard stuff yet."

"Ugh, don't mention _that_."

Naruto snorted out another laugh. Propping his chin on one hand, he pretended to doodle on the tabletop with Sasuke's discarded pencil. What he was really doing was watching Sasuke surreptitiously.

He hadn't slept much at all last night. Not after that thing that had happened when they'd been sitting side by side. He wasn't even sure if it was a thing. He only knew that Sasuke had looked like he was about to kiss him, and he'd wanted it to happen. Wanted it more than he'd ever wanted anything. And then he'd chickened out at the last second and turned away.

He couldn't say with any certainty whether or not he liked Sasuke. He didn't know if he did. Like seemed like such a safe, tame, unassuming little word. He liked the color orange. What he felt around Sasuke was so much more than that, had so much more intricacy. There was nothing straightforward about what he felt.

On the one hand, he hated some of the things Sasuke did, and his attitude…while at the same time applauding it in some dark, violent part of himself. Sasuke did all the things he didn't have the balls to do. On the other hand, he adored Sasuke's vulnerability, the way it was these episodes of defenselessness which allowed him a toehold in Sasuke's regard. He'd forced himself in, forced Sasuke to see him for who he was: someone he _could_ be vulnerable and defenseless around.

But being around Sasuke was hard, too. It was hard not to feel hurt or react angrily to everything he said. Hard to stand up to him and defend himself while still showing him that he would never step on him when he was down, like in the convenience store. It was hard not to be afraid whenever Sasuke left the home. The big, bright, glittery world of people with lives was out there…what was there in the home to bring Sasuke back?

_There's me, _Naruto thought with embarrassment. _Just me, and he definitely keeps coming back._

And then there were all the jagged pieces of Sasuke. The pieces that didn't fit in with all his darkness. Like shiny jewels caught in tar or quicksand, or some other substance that could consume them. Could, but so far hadn't. And the longer he was around Sasuke, the more those jewel-like parts of him became visible.

Looking at him, at the bent head, the sharp eyes, the handsome mouth, Naruto felt…odd. He couldn't describe the feeling. It was all over his body, yet concentrated in his center. He felt tingly, and hot, and cold, and numb. It was a strangely physical feeling, even while his mind spun with thoughts and his chest ached with emotion.

Sasuke glanced up at him and caught him staring. "What?"

_I don't like you. But I love all your ugly beautiful parts. _"Nothing. Tired. I'm hitting the sack." He managed a realistic yawn, got up, and left the kitchen.

Shrugging, Sasuke went back to his computer.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: My apologies for being behind on replying to reviews. I'm pretty busy these days.

* Not affiliated with Chumbawumba in any way.

* * *

Chapter 9

"He's _where_?"

"Here. At the home," Iruka said. He switched the phone to his other ear so that he could lean sideways. This left him able to see that Sasuke and Naruto were parked at the kitchen table, same as they had been for the past week. "Studying with Naruto. I wasn't sure if you were aware or not, since he seems to be living here. I've heard nothing from you, nor did I receive any form for the service he's doing."

A moment of silence, before Itachi said, "Service? What service?"

"He resumed his one-on-one. Twelve hour bracket, though he's here 18 hours a day. Decided to do nurturing this time as well, and asked that his program be altered so that he only socialized with Naruto, instead of the standard three residents. Seeing as how contact with your brother has transformed Naruto, I felt inclined to oblige him. Especially considering the change I also see taking place in your brother. Is-"

"I'm coming down there."

"Well, there's no need really. I only called to-"

"Said I'd be down there. Gimme ten minutes."

The phone went dead. Iruka shrugged and hung it up.

* * *

"This stuff is fascinating," Naruto muttered. He turned another page in the Geometry textbook.

Sasuke didn't look up from his laptop. "Don't know why you're still looking at it. Didn't you learn it all already?"

"Learn it all? Hell no. I'm not you, with a photo-whatsit memory. I have a general idea of what the books contain now, but I could read these forever, even if I did know it all. You ready?"

"One sec…" Sasuke's fingers hammered rapidly on the keys a moment more, before he hit Save, and closed the computer. "Done."

Naruto reached for the math exam Sasuke had managed to hack from his school, and studied it. "You sure this isn't cheating?"

"Hells yeah it's cheating," Sasuke griped. "But I can't have you trying to teach me every frigging thing in those books. I'll be lucky to pass that test as it is, even knowing what's on it. Just…help me the best you can."

"I am. I _have_ been, but you have issues, man. There's a ton of stuff you need to know before you can tackle some of these problems, and you just don't know it."

Sasuke glared at the test. "Wish you could take it for me."

"Me too."

"Right. Well. Damn thing's tomorrow, so let's just get through this."

"Still don't see how come you can't memorize this stuff." Naruto opened the notebook Sasuke used to a fresh page and took up a pencil.

"Because it's not words, man! It's all sorts of meaningless squiggle lines and shapes and shit I _don't_ _understand_."

"All right, all right. Chill. Look here…"

* * *

Itachi stood in the living room and watched his brother in silence. He could see the blond kid explaining something, illustrating with his pencil, or his hands, or pieces of cereal, while Sasuke frowned in concentration and nodded. Sometimes his brother asked a question, or scribbled in a notebook, or manipulated the cereal himself, but he didn't lose that look of concentration. Seeing it, Itachi was forcibly reminded of the fact that he hadn't seen that expression since before the night their parents died. Nowadays, if he saw Sasuke at all, his brother looked shut down and distant, or else pissed at the world.

He watched for a long time.

When the blond kid made a comment about something, and Sasuke suddenly threw his head back and laughed, he had to turn away and cover his streaming eyes with a thumb and forefinger.

Iruka offered a box of tissue.

"Ah…" Itachi took one and mopped his face. "God. Fuck." He blew his nose. "Just fuck."

"I have an office," Iruka said quietly. "It's not much, but if you'd care to talk…?"

Itachi nodded.

-oOo-

In the cramped office, Iruka pretended to rearrange the piles of paper on his desk, giving Itachi time to collect himself.

"Thought he was dead," Itachi said hoarsely some time later. "Hadn't seen him. Last I _had_ seen him, he and Naruto had been shot at. Thought that was it when he didn't come home the next day. That he'd gotten himself mixed up in some shit and someone had blown his brains out. Been combing the obits, looking for a 17-year-old John Doe. Jesus." He tried to stem the tide of fresh tears with his soggy tissue.

Iruka had frozen at learning the boys had been shot at. Now he pushed another box of tissue at his guest and sat back. "I don't know that I can allow your brother to remain here or in contact with Naruto, if he's going to be exposing him to that kind of danger." Naruto had a lot of explaining to do, he thought grimly.

Itachi sat forward at once. "No, you have to let him stay. Look at him, he's out there _studying_. My brother hasn't studied in years. _Years_. He's doing something positive, finally, trying to come back. I can't let you stop him."

Studying the wet black eyes, Iruka gave a small nod. "All right. But if he reverts to his previous ways-"

Itachi held up a hand and sat back again. "I will put him in Juvie myself. Or…the Academy. Better that than him dead in some gutter. But I don't think he will revert. I think that blond kid keeps him here. I think he's changing him. He's a strong kid, if he is. Has to be, to hang with Sasuke and have the effect I'm seeing. Who is he?"

Iruka was busy mentally listing all the questions he suddenly had about Sasuke's past and his home life. The query brought him out of his thoughts. "Who, Naruto? A lifelong resident. A troubled young man himself, but Sasuke seems to have an positive affect on him."

"Huh. Two negatives becoming positive, what are the odds?" Itachi crossed one ankle over his knee and fixed his unblinking eyes on Iruka. "Tell me everything."

"I'm sorry?"

"That kid. Naruto. I want to know everything there is to know about him. Leave nothing out."

* * *

As they did every night now, they saved whatever take-out Sasuke brought after school for after the studying was done. It was something to look forward to. They closed the books now and carried the bags out to the tree house, where Naruto spread them on the floor.

The tree house had undergone a major transformation in the scant week Sasuke had been living there. A dresser stood in one corner of the main room now, along with several huge cushions, an area rug that had lately graced Sasuke's room at his apartment, and most of Sasuke's schoolbooks. Naruto had shown Sasuke a smaller room that sat partially atop the main one. It was accessible by a rope ladder outside the west window. This was where they now slept. The dimensions were close, making it a snug fit for the two of them, but neither complained. Sasuke had obtained a feather mattress that all but filled the little room, and a host of fluffy down pillows. Neither boy had ever slept more comfortably in their lives.

-oOo-

They ate in silence.

During the past week, studying non-stop as they were, it had been hard to miss the stolen glances and hastily averted stares that cropped up between them. They ignored this development for the most part, but sometimes it caught them unawares.

Like tonight. Near the end there in the kitchen, Sasuke had been doggedly trying to solve one last problem. Naruto had watched, head propped on his hand. He'd arrived at the solution long minutes before Sasuke had, and switched to watching him instead.

He liked looking at Sasuke. Especially when he was busy, and not staring back. He liked the way he couldn't breathe when he looked at him.

But then Sasuke had looked up suddenly and caught him staring. He hadn't looked away. Neither had Sasuke. It was one of those moments they sometimes had, when their eyes would meet and a bunch of information would be relayed between them. Stuff they couldn't say, but that each of them nonetheless knew.

_I like you._

_I like you too._

_A lot._

_Me too._

Sasuke had looked away first this time, but he'd immediately looked back. His notebook had been closed slowly, his pencil set on top of it. Without breaking eye contact, he'd turned his body in his chair so that he was facing Naruto. His right hand and Naruto's were both on the table, fingers nearly touching. Sasuke's fingers inched forward-

And Naruto stood up, saying they were done for the night.

Sasuke scared him. Whenever they had those moments, he scared him a lot.

Eating now, Naruto risked a peek at Sasuke under the guise of reaching for the fries. Sasuke's eyes were waiting for him. Meeting them unexpectedly was like a hard gut punch. His hand faltered, collided with his soda can, and knocked it over. He and Sasuke reached for it at the same time. Naruto jerked his hand back.

* * *

Sasuke mopped up the mess. A brand new trashcan shaped like a frog stood in the corner. He tossed the wad of napkins into its open mouth and continued eating.

The knowledge that Naruto was ducking him almost made him smile. He knew he had the guy on edge, just as he knew Naruto was probably nervous. He didn't know what to do about it; every time he tried to make a move, Naruto ran. Addressing the sitch directly would probably meet with similar results.

If his interest wasn't returned, he'd have thrown in the towel and moved on. But it _was_ returned. Naruto clocked him just as hard, and he hadn't made a peep of protest at the mattress and sleeping arrangements. A few times he'd even rolled against Sasuke while pretending to be sleep. He hadn't minded. Had thrown an arm over Naruto in turn while also pretending, but that was as far as it went.

It was driving him nuts.

If he weren't distracted with summer school, assignments, and the torture of math, he'd have done something decisive by now. Tomorrow he had his Math and Science finals. Once those were out of the way, summer school would be a breeze.

Tomorrow. He'd do something then.

-oOo-

"Are you really leaving?" Naruto said suddenly. He was looking at him again, but it was a normal look.

"Huh?"

"Konoha. Are you leaving?"

"Oh." Sasuke swirled a fry in ketchup, thinking. "I guess."

Naruto stared at his burger as he chewed. "Where will you go?"

"I don't know."

"Why can't you stay here?"

"Don't want to."

"I think it's because you can't face your brother."

Sasuke paused mid-chew. "…_What?_"

"Been thinking about it a lot. How you live, why you live like that. Saw how you are around your brother. And you said he gave up on you and wants you gone. So you're going. But I think it hurts you. Him, I mean. How he just loves you, and doesn't blame you. You said his forgiveness was the reason you began ditching school and shit, but I think you just can't face him. He took care of you, and loved you. Supported you. Pursued your dream when you couldn't. All of that makes you feel bad because he wouldn't have to do any of those things if you hadn't…if your parents hadn't died, which you think is your fault. He's this constant reminder of what you think you did. You wish he hated you, but he doesn't. So you hate him instead to make yourself feel better. And you're running. All your staying out and ditching school is you running from him. I think you do the shit you do to piss him off. You don't talk about it with him, but I'm sure he knows. Maybe you're hoping he'll finally hate you."

Sasuke sat in frozen, outraged shock.

"But since him giving up on you obviously hurt you so much, I think it's all an act. So….yeah, I don't get why you're leaving. I mean, he doesn't _act_ like he wants you gone. I think that's just your excuse."

Utterly and completely beyond speech, Sasuke slowly set his own burger down and considered punching Naruto. Just whaling on his ass until his hands bled. Instead, he got up, went down the ladder, and left.

Naruto stubbornly finished his food alone. _You're no better, you fucking coward, _he scolded himself. _You totally told him all that just now to avoid all that other crap between the two of you that you can't face. Deliberately pissed him off because you're scared he'll kiss you._

Damn right, he was scared. If Sasuke kissed him, his feelings would be worse. Sasuke was leaving. _And I'll soon be homeless._

* * *

Running into his brother while leaving the home did absolutely nothing to improve Sasuke's mood. At least Itachi could be depended upon to leave unmentionable crap alone, though. That was something. He said nothing at seeing Sasuke. Only opened the car and got in, and then waited until Sasuke had slammed himself into the passenger seat before pulling off.

The quiet between them on the ride home was thick enough to cut. Sasuke wondered if his brother had come looking for him, while Itachi wondered if Sasuke's fury had anything to do with Naruto. A few times, he felt Sasuke sneaking sidelong glances at him, but he kept his eyes on the road.

-oOo-

Once in the apartment, Itachi went directly to his books.

Sasuke stood just inside the living room, apparently indecisive about something. Itachi ignored him for as long as he could, before looking up with a sigh. He found his brother staring at him with an arrested expression on his face. As if years worth of the words Itachi had only dreamed of hearing were right there, ready to be spoken at long last. He could almost hear the words, so palpable were they in the distance separating them.

But Sasuke let out a harsh exhalation, and ran to his room.

It left Itachi feeling as if the damage between them would never be repaired.

* * *

Naruto didn't see Sasuke the next day. The kids found him irritable and unapproachable up in his tree house, and kept their distance. Iruka left him alone.

He spent a good part of the day in the tree house's bedroom, staring out the small window and thinking of Sasuke.

If Sasuke would be willing to wait four months, he'd ask to come with him when he left. But Sasuke hadn't offered. Hadn't even brought it up. If he was interested in Naruto, it was as a passing thing, much as Neji had only been interested in sex. The thought of not spending the rest of the foreseeable future with Sasuke hurt him too much to think about. His insides burned at the thought. At the realization that his fantasies would never be anything more than dreams.

He wanted Sasuke.

As in…

Naruto dropped his chin on his stacked hands and let his feet thump rhythmically on the mattress.

_I suppose I want him to be my boyfriend. My everything. Friend, boyfriend, lover…just everything. _It frightened him how Sasuke was a fever in his skin. A need. All he thought about whenever Sasuke wasn't around. It seemed like he'd woken up one day and just realized he wasn't himself anymore. That he was sharing his skin with Sasuke, that the guy was inside him to that extent.

And Sasuke wanted him too. That was the worst part. The best part. Sasuke actually wanted little ole him.

_Just not enough to take me with him. Guess he's mad at me right now. Better if he stays mad at me. I can deal if things don't get too heavy between us. But if he does…something, I'll fall. Barely hanging on as it is. I don't want to fall in love with him. I don't even know what love is._

And yet sometimes, when he was side by side with Sasuke right here on this mattress, and they were both pretending to sleep, he knew that for the lie it was. Maybe he'd never felt love, but he knew it now that he was breathing it in with the smell of Sasuke every day.

He stared morosely out the window.

* * *

The following day, Naruto slept in late, and didn't stir till the afternoon. This was his habit, the way he and Sasuke slept while studying long into the night. Sasuke usually got up only minutes before he was due at summer school, but Naruto slept until shortly before he came back.

He tried not to jump out of his skin in surprise at finding Sasuke parked in the main room of the tree house now, tapping away at his computer. Instead, he went to the dresser, and selected one of the T-shirts and pairs of shorts, things Sasuke had stocked the dresser with.

"Scraped a C," Sasuke said to the room.

Naruto remained at the dresser, his back to him. "What?"

"Math final. Scraped a C. It was actually a D, but she gave me points for effort."

"Oh. Good."

"I want to show you something. Later."

Braced as much as possible now, Naruto turned around. Sasuke was staring at his screen. "What?"

"I'm taking you to my place later. Cleared it with Iruka."

Staring at Sasuke's bent head, Naruto tried to decide if this had anything to do with what he'd said the other night. It couldn't have been more clear that the nonchalant attitude all but forbade any further discussion on the topic, but he'd seen Sasuke like this before. The expressionless face, the clipped, sharp speech, and jerky movements. This was how Sasuke was when he was pissed or agitated.

And Sasuke, it must be said, did some unpleasant things when agitated.

Naruto felt the side of his neck. Sasuke had removed the stitches himself a few nights ago, and pronounced the wound healing nicely. That didn't mean Naruto had forgotten the deliberate way it had been given, or that Sasuke was capable of violence in cold blood. So the question remained. Was this Sasuke's way of ignoring it, or planning revenge for what he'd said? What was supposed to happen at his place?

He'd take his chances. "Whatever."

* * *

Itachi wasn't home, Naruto saw once Sasuke had unlocked his door. That worried him. There'd be no witnesses to whatever was going to happen here, and no buffer between him and Sasuke. It was late afternoon. Maybe Itachi was only home at night.

He followed Sasuke to his room.

-oOo-

It was a pigsty. Clothes everywhere, papers. He did notice that a brand new CD player sat near the CD rack. And since Sasuke was only watching him, not speaking or anything, he went over to it.

He stood with a hand on it for some time, suddenly aware of the fact that music wasn't that big a part of his life. He rarely, if ever, heard any. Had no idea who was currently at the top of the charts or what the popular songs were. In fact, he didn't even know any songs. Just baby crap. Nursery rhymes.

Sasuke startled him by coming over to stand beside him. Still silence between them, but Sasuke reached into his CD rack, dislodging the stack until he'd found one that sat at the very back, behind all the rest. It was old. Cover was cracked. There was a word on it that Naruto couldn't read, a long one, and an odd, red baby face with a horrible grin on it. Sasuke just held the CD in his hands and looked at it, a frown knitting his brows together.

Naruto looked at it too, and waited.

After a minute, Sasuke backed up to his bed and slowly sat. Still staring at the case in his hands, he said, "This is the anthem of my youth. Soundtrack to my life before my parents died. Used to listen to it all the time. Funny…I hadn't remembered it till just now, watching you touch the CD player."

Naruto crept over, moving hesitantly. He didn't want to disrupt the mood Sasuke was in; it seemed delicate. As if it had been surprised into place. For the time being, it covered Sasuke's earlier agitation, though, and for that Naruto was grateful. Sasuke seemed more approachable now. "What's it about?" he whispered once he'd sat beside him on the bed. He kept his eyes on the CD case in Sasuke's hands.

A small hiss of laughter left Sasuke. Just a grunt of sound low down in his chest. "I don't really know. Nothing to do with the title, that's for sure. Least, I can't see how it does. Tubthumping is something to do with politics I think, but for me the song was –is- about being happy. Living life. I used to play this thing every fucking night. After dinner. I'd just play it over and over and over, loud enough to hurt the ears. We lived in a house on the other side of town back then, so there was no one to complain. Me, my brother, and our parents would dance like crazy the whole time, though. Just…dance. Sometimes my dad would pick me up and swing me around by my arms. Then, when we were all exhausted, my mom would stop the song, and get me ready for bed." Sasuke swallowed hard a few times. "Used to love this song. Hearing it, even the first note, was all about security. Being safe and loved and happy."

"Can I hear it?" Naruto asked quietly. "Or is that too painful?"

Sasuke stared at the case a while longer. "Yeah, okay." He got up, put it in the player, and hit the repeat button once the first track was selected.

-oOo-

Admittedly, hearing the opening verses and bars did tear at him, but he kept his eyes on Naruto. Looking at him sort of kept the pieces of his pain from spreading inside him and becoming _too_ painful.

He'd brought him here to set him straight. An argument at the home might have forced Iruka to get involved, especially if it got as ugly as Sasuke had expected it to. He'd planned to curse Naruto out royally. Just let loose and tell him he'd had no right to say what he'd said. And that if he said any of that shit again, he'd finish him for sure.

But when he'd gotten here, Naruto had had that wide-eyed look of curiosity he seemed to always have whenever he was here. Running his hands over the CD player as if he'd never seen one. Coupled with the things he'd planned to say to him, he supposed it was no wonder a memory of that song had come up.

Now here Naruto sat, nodding his head to the beat and beginning to smile.

The song _was_ hard to listen to; he hadn't gotten up when life knocked him down ten years ago. He'd stayed down. Let himself stay down. His self-loathing twisted sharply inside him just then, and he reached to shut the player off, unable to stand another second of it. Images of his family whole and laughing flashed painfully across his mind.

Naruto came over and gently grabbed his wrist. "I like it. Let's listen again."

"No."

"Just one more time? Please?"

The blue eyes were plaintive. Sasuke dropped his hand.

The second time hearing it was just as hard, but by the time the third repeat rolled around it was easier. Watching Naruto really did help. He had some crazy dance efforts of his own…which actually weren't that crazy. Guy had moves. Sasuke watched the fancy footwork, the weird air-punches, and felt a smile tug the corner of his mouth.

Naruto suddenly spun and dramatically leveled a finger at him, still dancing. "I dare you to dance," he grinned.

"I don't do dares."

"Punk."

"Fuck you." But his smile was growing.

"Punk ass biatch!" Naruto howled cheerfully as the song began again. He shimmied up to the player and held his finger against the volume button until Sasuke's window rattled. He grabbed Sasuke next, and shoved him hard into the middle of the room, where he nearly fell.

"Asshole!" Sasuke yelled, but he was grinning now. The lyrics blasted out, and they had him. Overrode his hurt and anger, until he was jumping and dancing just as hard as Naruto was.

Naruto was a violent dancer, Sasuke saw. Getting into the song, hollering the lyrics now, and sometimes pushing Sasuke. Naruto laughed whenever Sasuke pushed him back, or leaned into his face, his own red as a beet, as they screamed the song at each other. Neighbors pounded on the wall, but their cursing complaints were barely heard over the sound of the song playing again and again. Whenever the verse about next-door neighbors came on, it only cracked them up harder.

* * *

Sasuke had a moment during the bridge when they'd been listening for an hour. A moment wherein everything in him went still and quiet, despite the song's volume. Panting and sweaty, he stopped dancing and just looked at Naruto. Naruto had his back to him, grooving away. He took in every detail of Naruto from head to heel. Right then, winded and full of wholesome happiness, Sasuke saw all the insecure, self-confident, needy, independent, steadfast contrasts of him. Every part. The whole picture.

When the chorus boomed out again, he walked up to Naruto, who sensed him and turned around. Grabbing him firmly by the back of the neck, Sasuke pulled him in and kissed him. Hard.

The music pounded around them, but they were motionless now. Naruto's mouth was slack for only a second. Then his hands were pushing against Sasuke's chest. He pushed in earnest, but Sasuke resisted, bringing his other hand up now to shove one of Naruto's off him. Naruto shoved back, and Sasuke pulled away at last.

But only so he could grab Naruto's head in both hands, tug him in, and kiss him into submission.

Naruto, strong as he was, weakened beneath the force of the kiss. He was powerless beneath the gentle yet somehow implacable demand of Sasuke's mouth. And then he was pressing back with his lips, his heart hammering inside him almost hard enough to rival the music, and nearly breaking at the intensity of his feelings and Sasuke's sudden command of him.

When the kiss changed, turning wet and soft and greedy, that was it. He gave up fighting and shakily put his hands around Sasuke, who fit their bodies together in such a way that Naruto couldn't even breathe, let alone think.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: I hate that I couldn't fit this all into one chapter. Tried. Twenty-seven pages. Just wouldn't have made sense to add the next part here. Anyway, next chapter is the last.

* * *

Chapter 10

There were no words to describe it.

Sasuke, whom Naruto always privately thought of as physically weak, surprised him with his strength. His hands held his head still, or else slanted it as it suited him at first, but then, once Naruto had cautiously given in, one of Sasuke's arms curved around his back, drawing him close. The other hand remained in his hair, now cupping the back of his head. All at once, he was pressed to Sasuke's surprisingly hard body, with one of Sasuke's knees working its way between his legs. Off balance now, Sasuke slowly walked with him, pushing him back while keeping him from falling. Naruto's back hit the wall.

If anything, Sasuke intensified the kiss. A small sound left Naruto at the way their open mouths moved together. Taste and texture flooded his mind. Sensation seemed to pool below his waist, while his entire body became overly aware of Sasuke's every touch. Of every brush of his hands, and the way his hair remained in Sasuke's grip. Sasuke's lips, his mouth, his tongue. Heat rose up between them to swallow him whole. There was no air in the room, none. They had to share what little air there was, breathing it in from each other, sucking it in with each other's taste.

Naruto's head was spinning. If Sasuke hadn't been holding him against the wall, he'd have been too dizzy to stand on his own. It was all so strange, yet so good. So unbelievably good. Cheeks flaming, heart pounding, he was helpless not to issue another little moan, wanting more.

Sasuke kissed him harder, moaning now himself.

A shiver went through Naruto. Sasuke, feeling it, pressed their bodies closer together. Naruto clutched back with bruising eagerness, and all the while the song thudded around them, driving them to kiss harder and harder.

* * *

He could hear it from the street. Faint, but unmistakable. It was like a shot of adrenaline, the way his heart, his entire body, reacted to that long-remembered song. He could see their parents dancing. Little Sasuke wild and cackling. The image both hurt and comforted him, the way it always did. He had those memories often, but never more strongly as he did when hearing that song. God, how long had it been?

He rode the elevator to his floor, listening to the volume increase the closer he got to his apartment. Sasuke had to be playing that thing loud enough to wake the dead… Sasuke was playing _that_ song. Why? What did it mean?

The hall was packed with neighbors, several of whom were banging on the wall and his apartment door. They turned to him as one, faces furious, screaming over the song for him to get in there and turn it off before they called the police. It took awhile to get to his door, packed as the hall was.

-oOo-

Once inside his apartment, he went directly to Sasuke's room and knocked hard.

No answer.

Upon opening the door, he thought the place was empty at first. Then he caught movement to his right, and saw his brother and Naruto almost directly behind the door. The sight of his brother kissing someone only gave him pause for a moment. Neither responded to their names being called, and it wasn't until he'd gone over and shut the CD player off that either of them realized they weren't alone anymore. He stood there, looking at Sasuke wonderingly, while they blinked at him as if they were dazed. Probably were, Itachi decided. Both faces were pink, and their hair was sweaty.

"Neighbors are ready to call the cops," he said into the silence. That was it. He made a tactful exit and shut his brother's door behind him.

For a moment, he leaned against it.

Sasuke passing his finals, doing summer school, and making a friend could not equal the statement of that song. That song, more than anything else, told him in no uncertain terms that his brother was back. That he was finally healing. The emotions this called up left him breathless. Grinning, amazed, and breathless.

But then he remembered how fucked things were between him and Sasuke, and the grin faded a little. _He's happy, though. He's coming around, and that's all that matters. _

* * *

Sasuke rested his forehead against Naruto's, as their trembling gradually faded. When he straightened at last, it was to find Naruto's eyes wide and fearful. No, wait. Maybe fearful wasn't the right word. Nervous? Uncertain? Questioning, that was the word. There were questions in his eyes. Sasuke rather thought the answer to what came next was obvious, until he remembered that Naruto might not have been with anyone before.

"You okay?" he asked.

A jerky nod.

He didn't think it would do to come right out and ask if Naruto was a virgin. No guy wanted to have to admit to that but, well, he sort of needed to know. "Have you ever…?"

Jerky head shake this time. "That. That was my first. Kiss."

Well, shit. "Oh. So you and Neji…" He let his eyes ask the rest, raising his brows.

More head-shaking.

Sasuke felt something settle with disturbing finality in him. Something like relief, but he didn't want to examine it too closely. "I see." He had an urge to draw Naruto in and just hold him. Hold him and never let go. He'd wanted him almost from the moment he'd known him. Obviously Naruto wanted him too, and there were condoms in his bedside drawer. Still, the guy _was_ a virgin, and he didn't relish the idea of doing with Itachi right in the next room. He'd waited this long, he could wait a few hours more. "I guess we should get back."

Naruto cleared his throat. "Yeah. I guess."

But they didn't move. And when Sasuke moved his head forward an inch in question, searching those wide eyes, Naruto seemed to answer with a small forward movement of his own.

* * *

By the time they finally did make it back to the home, it was late. Iruka opened the door for them, looked back and forth between them, then curtly told them to take a seat in the kitchen. "Wait for me there," he added in a tight voice.

Naruto and Sasuke frowned at each other, but obeyed. When Iruka met them there a few minutes later, he had a solemn Hinata with him. His jaw was clenched, eyes more serious than either boy had ever seen them.

Sasuke knew what was coming, but Naruto was wide open. Which was probably why Iruka attacked him first.

"Hinata tells me the police have spoken to Neji," Iruka said in a low voice. "It seems he went to Oto at your behest, Naruto. I remember that night. You told me you two were going to the park. It wasn't until Sasuke brought you back that I learned you'd been in Oto at all. Understandably, worry over Neji's condition occupied my mind, but I haven't forgotten. And I've _since_ learned that you were shot at. _Shot_ _at_, Naruto. How could you deceive me like that? How could you lie to my face in order to put yourself in such danger?"

Naruto's head had long since lowered as Iruka spoke. He shook it slowly now, and gave a miserable shrug. "I had to see him," he mumbled.

Iruka's eyes cut to Sasuke at hearing this. "I don't like what Sasuke's influence is doing to you," he said to Naruto. He kept his eyes on Sasuke, completely uncaring of speaking so plainly in his presence. "Nor do I like the fact that you're letting bad influences corrupt your common sense. Sneaking off to Oto, lying to me, letting Sasuke put you in harm's way…this isn't you. This isn't the kid I raised. You're better than that, and you know it."

Naruto, unused to reprimands of such severity, hung his head lower. "I haven't been back since."

"Only because Sasuke has been _here_," Iruka snapped. "I've no doubt that if he weren't you'd find some way to break the rules again. I'm disappointed in you, Naruto. Worse…you've shown me I can't trust you anymore. You have no idea how much that hurts me."

Sasuke watched all this with hooded eyes. He'd met Iruka's glare of disapproval with a direct look of his own, but now he watched as Naruto seemed to sink in his chair beneath the weight of this expertly-delivered guilt-trip. "It wasn't his fault," he heard himself saying.

Iruka turned to him, aiming himself at Sasuke as if ready and eager to hear anything that would allow him to deny him further access to the home.

Sasuke, aware of that, spoke carefully. "It wasn't his fault we were shot at, and Neji should have known better than to let a deception like that take place right under your nose. You ask me, _you're_ the one endangering people. Letting someone like Neji on the premises." He slid his eyes to where Hinata stood timorously. "And let's not forget the fact that you're having an illegal relationship with a minor. What kind of example is _that_ to set for the kids here? From either of you?"

Hinata covered her mouth with a hand. Iruka spluttered, his chest swelling with outrage and insult. "Get out," he rasped. "Get _out_ of this house, I want you far away from this home or I will call the police!"

"You've no grounds to have me arrested. I'm doing a service here. I, however, _can_ call in a little matter of statutory rape-"

"I'm sixteen," Hinata whispered.

"It's _rape_, and I'm sure the authorities would be interested in hearing about it," Sasuke concluded. "Your call." He gazed at Iruka with unflinching promise in his black eyes. _Try to kick me out and you'll regret it._

Iruka was loath to give in, but when he dropped his eyes from Sasuke's they both knew the matter was over. He and Naruto were left alone in the kitchen, as Iruka led a weeping Hinata out.

-oOo-

Naruto waited a moment, watching the belligerent lines of Sasuke's face smooth out to their normal appearance. "How'd you know about them?"

"Had my suspicions. They're always all over each other when they think no one's looking." Namely while he and Naruto were studying late at night and all the children were asleep.

"Oh. I get why you said all that, defending me and everything, but Iruka's a nice guy. And it's not rape. Hinata's like…agreeable. He's not hurting her or anything."

"Consensual or not, she's a minor. And this wasn't about you. I don't like being threatened."

"Oh." Naruto's face fell.

Sasuke grit his teeth at how that small expression twisted inside him. Of course it had been about Naruto, but, well, he really _didn't_ like threats. "You hungry?" he said, to change the subject.

"Not really."

"That's a first."

The awkward silence that followed seemed to be full of the knowledge that they'd kissed. And that it was late and the only thing in their immediate future was for them to go to bed, where they would be shirtless and all of six inches away from each other. In one bed.

Sasuke stared at Naruto's bowed head, watching him look at the cracked linoleum of the kitchen floor.

Finally, Naruto got up without looking at him and headed for the tree house.

* * *

Once there, both boys undressed in the main room without meeting each other's eyes. The weather was hot and muggy enough to have them ascending the rope ladder to the bedroom in their underwear. Naruto crawled to his side, turned, and sat on his knees.

Sasuke managed to get in the bedroom with more difficulty, as usual, especially since he had a condom clutched in one fist. It was a few moments before he noticed the way Naruto was nervously looking at him.

That was all he did, was look. Sasuke crawled over until he was kneeling in front of him, weight supported on his hands. Another few silent moments ticked by, with each of them staring at each other. The sharpish edges of the foil-wrapped condom dug into Sasuke's palm. When he rocked forward an inch, questioning with his eyes, Naruto lunged for him and grabbed his face in both hands. The kiss was just as hungry as before. Maybe even more so. It seemed that the absence of music heightened each boy's awareness of the other.

It wasn't until they fell to the bed in a tangle of grasping limbs and muffled grunts that Naruto felt the first real prickle of alarm. But not at first. At first, though the kiss was urgent, the majority of his mind was occupied at how it felt to be chest to chest. How his nipples tingled at the contact, and how their bare legs and arms felt as they rubbed against each other. Then Sasuke's body settled on his more completely. His erection was hard for Naruto to ignore- especially when Sasuke nudged his legs apart. Sasuke's hips seemed to fit this new space as if made for it, and the flush contact of their groins was enough to make his own semi-arousal explode to full, rock-hard readiness.

But he wasn't ready. He might want Sasuke with a strength that twisted his emotions into knots, but he wasn't ready for this step in their relationship.

Sasuke, at feeling his arousal, moaned and ground their hips together. He broke the kiss to fumble with something he had clutched in his hand. Seeing it, Naruto felt the prickle of alarm become a loud, clanging bell of warning in his head. He reached out to lightly close his hand around Sasuke's. "Stop."

In the stillness that followed that soft command, Sasuke found that he was panting. A first for him; beyond an erection, he couldn't remember being excited to this degree when fucking guys down in Oto…and he'd never been _this_ hard. His cock throbbed with need, but Naruto was telling him to stop. "What…did I do something?" He could see Naruto wetting his lips nervously as he sat up, and moved back to sit up as well. "Did I?"

"No…" Naruto's eyes skipped up sheepishly to his then looked away. "I just don't think I'm ready for this yet."

Sasuke frowned down at the front of Naruto's shorts. "Oh." For a few seconds he debated commenting on the evidence to the contrary, before deciding to just go ahead. "Seemed ready?"

Now Naruto fidgeted. "I know. I mean I liked this, it's just. You know. Going." His hands described something vague in the air.

"Going?" Sasuke said, looking back and forth between the gesture and Naruto's face.

"All the way. I can't."

"Oh. Why?"

But Naruto didn't seem able to answer this. He gazed down at where he was fixedly picking at his nails.

Sasuke didn't like how much this rejection hurt. This, right here, was why he didn't do relationships, he thought as he finally moved to his side of the mattress. Relationships opened you up to all sorts of bullshit that straight fucking always shielded you from. He should never have kissed Naruto. Never even opened that door. Turning on his side, he gave Naruto his back.

This evening, on the long, silent walk from his apartment to the home, he'd snuck glances at Naruto and wondered if the kiss made them boyfriends. Lying in bed now, he could admit that he had no idea what they were. And no clue whatsoever on how to be a boyfriend, if they were. Were they in a relationship? For some reason that shortened his breath with nerves or excitement, he couldn't decide which. Whatever they were, it didn't seem like Naruto wanted him the same way he wanted Naruto.

He swallowed hard. "Do you want me to go too? Like Iruka does?" he asked when he'd worked up the balls.

Naruto's voice was low. A whisper. "No. Please no."

The knot of tension forming in Sasuke's belly slowly loosened. It was awhile before either of them found sleep.

* * *

They were in the middle of June. There was time yet until summer's end and Sasuke's departure. Two months and change. Naruto woke the following afternoon to find Sasuke's half of the bed empty. Wondering how they'd make it through the rest of the summer, he descended to the main room of the tree house.

Sasuke was just climbing up from the backyard, back from summer school. Both boys stopped at seeing the other. Their kiss and last night's debacle replayed themselves in the stillness between them, as how to proceed was silently addressed.

Naruto offered a crooked, uncertain smile. That had Sasuke climbing the rest of the way inside. Issue addressed, case closed.

Or so they thought. An understanding had been reached between them during that first glance, wherein it was agreed they'd go back to how they'd been before. But a few nights later, as Naruto sat poring through one of the Math textbooks, and Sasuke sat editing an essay, a feeling had cropped up between them. That same old low-grade sizzle that would have them sneaking glances at each other, each very aware of the other's slightest movement. Once the studying was done, as they were in the tree house stripping down to their underwear, Naruto suddenly turned to Sasuke and kissed him. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry," he kept saying over and over, between kisses. Sasuke only kissed him back, pressing him painfully against the dresser.

After, up in the bedroom, Sasuke had been leery of continuing the kiss, opting to keep his distance lest another rejection was issued. Naruto seemed expectant for a time, but Sasuke gave his back, as he had that other night, and lay in stiff anticipation of Naruto asking for more. He didn't. Sasuke swallowed his disappointment.

Naruto cried a few silent, bitter tears for his confusion. How could he tell Sasuke that he didn't want to give himself up for a summer fling? He wasn't a staunch believer in holding on to one's virginity, but he _did_ want to wait until he was with someone he mattered to. Sasuke seemed all eager to fuck him, but that wasn't good enough. Naruto wanted more. He wanted promises, commitment. He didn't want to be just a piece of ass. _I want to know you love me._

The past few days had been awful. They spoke to each other, but there was coolness to their interactions now that chilled Naruto to the bone. On the surface, he pretended nothing was wrong, as he was sure Sasuke was doing. Inside, he'd been burning for their old comfort around each other, and wondering anxiously if he was pushing Sasuke away by denying him sex. But then tonight, Sasuke had looked up at him the way he'd used to, and the burning had become worse, until downstairs by the dresser, he'd been unable to hold himself back anymore. He couldn't stand being separated from Sasuke in any way.

He hadn't even known what he was apologizing for. Maybe for denying him that night. Or maybe for kissing him after denying him, thus fucking up the issue more. He didn't care at the point. All he cared about was that Sasuke was kissing him back just as hard, and holding him just as tight. It was like some major vise that had been squeezing his head flat finally loosened and he could breathe again.

_If he asks for it tonight, I'll let him, _he'd thought when they made it upstairs. But Sasuke just looked at him a moment, then went to his side of the mattress. It was both upsetting and a relief, because he still wasn't ready. Not really. And he didn't like the discovery that he'd be willing to let himself be used for sex just to make someone else happy.

_You fucking slut, _he thought savagely at himself. And with that, his tears dried up.

* * *

The days leading into July were a bit tense. On the one hand, they each wanted things from the other that neither were sure how to go about pursuing. On the other hand, things seemed fine between them, if somewhat less vocal. There weren't any laughs, or the general horsing around that used to pepper their interactions, but Sasuke's nightly study sessions never stopped, and Naruto was always at his elbow, a Math book in hand. An undercurrent of intimacy still throbbed between them, and there was no specific or defined anger that either could detect in the other. Things were just…tense.

Sasuke got fed up with the tension one afternoon. He surprised Naruto by pulling out a set of huge flashcards from his bag instead of the usual sheaf of assignments. His laptop was also notably absent once Naruto looked around. They were in the tree house, and Sasuke had just come back from summer school. "No papers to do today?" Naruto asked.

"I'm ahead of schedule," Sasuke said. "I mean besides being years late with the shit to begin with. Figured I'd devote some time to a side project." He set the flashcards aside, and pulled out a thin, orange book. "See this?"

Naruto dutifully studied the book. There was a creature on it, one who seemed to be holding a platter of rotten eggs and an equally rotten haunch of meat. "Yeah?"

Sasuke walked on his knees to where Naruto was sitting. "Read it for me."

Taking the book as it was handed to him, Naruto saw the way Sasuke folded his hands and waited, as if actually expecting to hear a story. "Come on, man, what the fuck. You know I can't read. I mean I can read a few words, but not _read_ read."

"Yeah. And I'm going to fix that. Read."

"I just said I can't. And fix it how? Nobody else could."

Sasuke stared at the book. "Spoke to Iruka about that. Seems the only people who tried to teach you were volunteers who happened to come by. Checking the records myself, I saw that half those volunteers were teens themselves who had no real teaching experience. One was an old woman who likely had outdated methods of teaching, and the rest were lazy jackasses sent to do community service here. You've never had a real teacher teach you."

"…You're not a teacher either." But Naruto felt a sharp burst of hope in his chest.

"No. But I'm your friend. You helped me, now I'm helping you. Personally, I don't get why Iruka didn't try to teach you himself."

Nice as Iruka was, and as great as he was with the kids, he didn't actually have a lot of patience or time to deal with all of Naruto's more serious issues. Naruto didn't say this. "What makes you think I can even learn?"

"Because you're not dumb. Now, _read_."

Naruto looked at the cover again. "I can't."

"Try. Didn't you ask me a math question before you started teaching me? Well this is the same thing. I need to see what it is you do know."

He still couldn't do it. Feeling his face heat in shame, Naruto clenched his jaw.

Up till now, Sasuke had purposefully kept his eyes averted from Naruto's face, knowing full well how humiliating it was to show your shortcomings. Now he risked a peek and was unsurprised to see the furious battle against tears. He looked back at the book. "I know it's embarrassing, man. I feel the same way about math, especially since you're such a freak with it, but…dude, you saw me at my worst. You-" Sasuke couldn't help looking around to make sure there was no one else. "You saw me _stab_ a guy. Took my bloody hand and said it was okay. Just let me help, all right? I won't laugh, I promise."

Right then Naruto felt such love for Sasuke that the tears won out. He violently pushed the heel of one hand up the side of his face, scrubbing away a tear that had fallen. "Okay," he nodded.

It was horrible. If this was how Sasuke had felt trying to answer the simple math question he'd asked, he had new respect for him. "Guh…huh-r…rrrrrr…ray. Nuh? Gray-nuh? Grain?"

"Green," Sasuke said.

"Oh. Green. Eeeeeeeee…guh. Suh. Eeg-suh."

"Eggs."

"Green. Eggs. Aaaannnn-"

Sasuke took the book. "That's enough, I can take it from here." He put the book in his bag, scooped up the flashcards, and went to the ladder. "Let's go to the kitchen, I need the board."

Naruto, nearly panting in the aftermath of that effort, bounced up and disappeared out the window. Sasuke heard the thud of his landing below and shook his head.

-oOo-

In the kitchen, Sasuke noted that Naruto sat with a good deal more anticipation for the coming lesson than he had when learning math. "You seem eager."

"You won't give up on me," Naruto grinned. "If I take awhile to learn or don't understand, I can tell you'll just push me harder. I need that. Plus you're super smart, smarter than those people who tried to teach me. If I prove too stupid or dumb, you'll find a way around it. So yeah, I'm eager. _Fuck_ yeah, I'm eager." His eyes were as wide and round as they could go, face stretched into a shining expression of wild happiness.

"Riiiight," Sasuke said. "I'll do my best. First off, the word stupid means lacking intelligence or common sense. That's not you. You've consistently displayed keen intelligence for as long as I've known you. Second, the word dumb means unable to speak, usually due to some birth defect. Again, that's not you. If I'm going to help you at all, I need to know you're not going to throw roadblocks like that in my way. You _can_ learn."

_God, he is so fucking awesome. _Face flaming, heart pounding, Naruto nodded. "Okay. I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

"Good. Know what vowels are?"

"No."

Sasuke wrote five letters on the board. "We'll start with those."

"I know those letters!" Naruto bounced on his rickety chair until the thing creaked.

"I'm sure you know the whole alphabet-" Sasuke paused while Naruto nodded energetically "-but I want you to forget everything you think you know about reading. Can you do that?"

"Like how?" The look on Naruto's face said that if Sasuke only told him how to do it, he could fly to the moon on a banana if need be.

"Like for instance those aren't letters on the board. They're pictures."

"Oh…okay…"

"Remember when you were teaching me math? How you said putting numbers in different places changes the value of the number and junk?"

"What, you mean fractions and decimals? How a smaller number means a greater value if the number is less than one, but a greater number means a greater value if it's more than one?"

Sasuke was dizzy just hearing that. "Uh, yeah. Point is, a three can do one thing in one number, and something else in another number."

"Yeah, but only if-"

"Same thing applies here," Sasuke overrode him by saying. He jerked a thumb behind himself at the board. "These pictures can talk. They make sounds. Depending on what kind of picture is next to them, they make different sounds. You know the names of these pictures but not what sounds they make. Let's go over that now."

By this time a lot of the smaller kids had crowded into the kitchen, along with Iruka and Hinata, both of whom seemed to have gotten over their anger at Sasuke. Everyone watched in silence as Naruto was taught.

"Those are the short sounds of the five vowels," Sasuke said some time later. "Let's see what other sounds you know."

The other kids hesitantly raised their hands when Sasuke held up the flashcards of the alphabet, but if a child said a letter's name and not the sound it made, they were wrong. Naruto caught on fast, as did the rest of them.

"Remember the short sounds the vowels made?" Sasuke asked when Naruto had shown he knew all the sounds.

"Yup."

"Let's put those together with other sounds."

-oOo-

That took the rest of the day. Sasuke, sick to death of the other kids, led Naruto back to the tree house, and produced a blank notebook from his bag and a pencil case. He first filled a couple of pages back and front with scores of phonetic three-letter words, some of which weren't actual words, but a working combination of letter sounds. Naruto read them all, very slowly at first, but with greater fluency toward the end. After, Sasuke handed him the notebook and dictated words. All phonetic. Naruto wrote until another couple of pages were done. He wasn't used to writing, and his letters were an untidy scrawl, but he persevered. When Sasuke stopped speaking, he looked up questioningly. "What?"

"What do you mean, what?"

"Why'd you stop?"

"We're done for today."

"But…" Naruto looked around in amazement. It was dark outside.

"You did great," Sasuke smiled. "Those teachers you had should be shot. Nothing's wrong with you. I know you want to continue until you're reading the dictionary, but I'm starving. Haven't eaten all day. And I want to do at least one assignment before I turn in."

"Oh." Naruto slowly closed his notebook and realized his hand was cramped from so much writing. "Will we continue tomorrow?"

"Mmhm." Sasuke was rummaging in his bag, where it turned out he had a few assignments folded and tucked away in a side pocket.

Looking at him, Naruto felt that same full feeling of sweeping love he had earlier, when Sasuke was urging him to try reading. He saw the way those dark lashes lowered as Sasuke read whatever his assignment was, saw the frown of disgust at something that was likely difficult, and said, "Kiss me."

Sasuke looked up quickly in confusion, brows still knit. Then the words registered and his face cleared a bit. The frown was replaced by wary caution as the assignment was slowly set aside.

Naruto crawled to him and knelt right in front of him. He looked at Sasuke's mouth. "Kiss me," he said again.

Moving slowly, watching Naruto's eyes the entire time, Sasuke inched his head forward.

The kiss was soft and searching. _Is this okay? What are we doing, what does this mean? _But then Naruto rocked forward, pushing Sasuke back a little, and Sasuke's hands came up and dragged Naruto down with him. They fell back on the rug, adjusting themselves as the kiss deepened.

* * *

Thereafter things were better. There was still tension, but of a different sort. Sex wasn't broached again, by either of them, but frequently whenever they were alone they found themselves kissing like mad. Sleeping side by side compounded the issue, but they never let it go beyond a few heady moments of lip-locked intensity. Anything more, and their bodies would take over.

Sasuke always backed off before then. He still didn't know what Naruto was hesitant about, but he at least knew the guy wanted him on some level. After that first rejection he'd spent several days thinking Naruto was disgusted by him after all. That he couldn't give himself to someone who'd killed his parents. Now he just thought maybe Naruto might be insecure for reasons he didn't know. The way he seemed to be insecure about a lot of things. He didn't want to push Naruto; Naruto was very capable of getting loud and angry whenever he felt Sasuke was being too much of a jerk, and he liked the delicate balance they had now. Maybe he didn't quite know what they were to each other, but he wouldn't risk upsetting that balance by trying to find out.

For Naruto, though he lived in fear of driving Sasuke away by continuing to refuse sex, he was adamant about not giving himself up for a summer fling. Though…he couldn't deny that Sasuke seemed to be going nowhere. He still kissed Naruto into senselessness whenever they could manage it, and seemed devoted to teaching him.

And the lessons were now the focus of Naruto's life. As promised, Sasuke had shown him how the vowel sounds made different sounds when placed with other vowels. In fact, there were a lot of rules, but once learned, they _did_ more or less make sense.

Sasuke held daily classes in the main room of the home, since all the kids were now his students. Some of the older ones who could already read were doing grammar lessons Naruto found mind-boggling (the fuck was an appositive?), while others who were even more advanced were given books to read and told to write reports on them. Sasuke had everyone busy, down to the toddlers, who'd been given special notebooks in which to trace their letters. Some didn't even have letters, but simple lines and circles that Sasuke called preparation to writing. Regardless to age, he assigned a ton of homework that had the home's residents, who were usually bored out of their minds and completely undisciplined, conforming to this strict 'school' in short order. How Sasuke was able to move between the different group levels he'd organized and keep them all busy, Naruto didn't know, but he himself was more than busy enough keeping up with his own workload. Sasuke introduced him to literally hundreds of what he called 'sight words'.

"These are words that don't really follow the rules I'm teaching you. You have to know them by sight," Sasuke said one day. And he would hold up a flashcard with a word on it. If Naruto didn't say the word in three seconds, Sasuke would say it for him, set the card on a pile of others words he'd missed, and move on to the next. If he was able to remember a sight word, it went on a different pile. At first the pile of words he didn't know was much bigger than the pile of words he did, but as time passed, the piles first evened out then switched heights.

Sasuke only taught them for three hours an afternoon. The rest of the time he needed for his own work, he said. Naruto and some of the other kids drilled each other on sight words and reading rules while Sasuke studied. They were now on diphthongs and consonant blends.

-oOo-

Sometimes Iruka pitched in and tested the kids on their latest lessons. As far as he was concerned, Sasuke could do no wrong now, especially when one kid collapsed in the bathroom one evening with a waxy yellow complexion. Sasuke had come on the run at Iruka's shout. Naruto had no idea what all the medical jargon that spewed out of his mouth was about, but it had been something to do with the kid's liver. Sasuke had spoken to the emergency dispatcher himself. Apparently the kid's life had been saved once he'd been taken to the hospital. After that, Sasuke had been gone for a day. When he came back, he'd had his disgruntled brother with him, who'd set about signing himself up for a week of med service to the home. Iruka had nearly kissed Sasuke.

It was indescribable to go seventeen years with your brain practically screaming from boredom, to not having enough hours in the day to cram all the stuff you were learning in to. Even with the long summer days, Naruto felt like he just couldn't get _enough_. Reading opened so many doors to him. Magazines and old newspapers that had been lying around the home for years were suddenly treasure troves. He could barely make out one word in ten, but he hoarded the publications just the same. No more sleeping away precious morning hours, either. Sometimes he and the other kids spent that time not saying a word, but passing painstakingly written notes to each other and to Hinata. Other times they wrote down the names for everything in the home, down to the walls and floor, and stuck these pieces of paper on the objects in question. Iruka put a stop to that when Naruto carefully laid the word 'vomit' next to a puddle of the stuff instead of cleaning it up.

-oOo-

The nights were another matter. He and Sasuke still managed to kiss after their mutually exhaustive days, but now some nights Naruto discovered something else while he slept. It wasn't something he'd experienced in years, not since he was twelve or so. It was like…even though he was asleep, he hadn't stopped kissing Sasuke. The excitement would follow him in slumber where it would give birth to dark, hot dreams of muffled sound and some thirsty thing that smelled of Sasuke, and chased him. He didn't know if he ran from it or fought with it, but it didn't want to hurt him. It just wanted him. And the touch of its hands on his body sent that excitement zinging through him in sharp spikes.

He'd always wake from these dreams to find his shorts wet and sticky. Sometimes Sasuke would turn over as he was climbing out the window. He'd regard Naruto with eyes barely open, and speak in a voice that was more asleep than awake.

"Where you going?"

"Nowhere," he'd say. "Bathroom."

That would be the end of it. Sasuke would roll back over and forget the episode. When Naruto came back from changing, he'd pause in the window, balanced on the balls of his feet, and just stare at him. Sasuke's fair body looked dark against their white sheet. Lean. Glistening with sweat. The thin material of his boxers sticking to his ass cheeks in a few places where the sweat had dampened the material. Legs bare and lightly dusted with black hair. Naruto would run his eyes up and down the length of Sasuke, and think about giving in. Just giving in to that gnawing need to feel those limbs all over him, to satisfy the consistent ache in his loins by any means other than his hand.

-oOo-

One night a couple of weeks after the lessons began, they were up in their bedroom. Sasuke asked for a bedtime story. Naruto looked over in question, surprised that they weren't kissing. "Huh?"

Sasuke pulled out the orange book from before.

"Oh." Naruto wet his lips nervously, before going to lie by the window, where the moonlight was strongest. Sasuke stretched out on his stomach next to him and waited.

_Just two weeks ago I couldn't even read this, _Naruto marveled. He had to pause before he began, as the letters now made perfect sense to him. To his shame, tears were coming again, but for a different reason. He cleared his throat. "Green Eggs and Ham."

* * *

Teaching Naruto how to read was a job that brought both boys closer together.

Sasuke concluded at the end of three weeks that Naruto was definitely challenged in some way. Sometimes a word he'd been reading perfectly for days suddenly didn't make sense to him anymore. He would have to re-learn it, or else he sometimes forgot the rules they'd learned and have to go back and re-learn those before moving forward. Seeing the way Naruto pushed himself to succeed despite these setbacks, the determination on his face, how earnest he was…it made him fall more in love with Naruto every day.

That was scary by itself. At discovering the compassion he had for the other students, who clearly had never had anything in their lives, not even the shitty teachers Naruto had been subject to, Sasuke thought he would commit suicide. It _disgusted_ him how he was unable to deny a five-year-old help on writing the letter E, or a preteen advice on sentence structure. He'd be laughing himself sick at anyone else stuck in his position. And if it were anyone else but Naruto displaying the square traits the blond did, he'd have stabbed them on general principle.

_But I'm in love with him. Fuck! _

And it seemed that everything Naruto did, down to making stupid mistakes that had Sasuke holding back a scream of frustration, made him love the dork even more.

-oOo-

Naruto didn't know how much more of Sasuke he could take. The lessons he could handle, but Sasuke…if something didn't give soon, he knew he'd bend over for Sasuke and humbly beg to be used at his discretion.

Iruka had always been kind to him. A good listener, if a bit frazzled with the weight of his duties. But Naruto had never had someone take such an unbelievably personal interest in him the way Sasuke did. Not because it was a job, or he had to because of community service, but because he _wanted_ to help Naruto. He helped the other kids too, (if only to shut them up, Sasuke had confided to him one day) but everything he did was for them was for _his_ sake, not the kids'. Naruto knew this. Knew that Sasuke didn't give a shit about anyone in the home but him. Only him. To someone who'd been so painfully starved for this kind of attention, it was almost unendurable.

He had his someone. A person who was devoted to him, and willing to stand by his side no matter how stupid he was. At least for the summer. _And he said I'm not stupid, just challenged. _If Sasuke didn't stop being so incredible soon, Naruto didn't know what would happen to him when he left. _I was in love with him before. Now I'm just fucked. _

He didn't care. Not even when he could see knowledge of how deep things were between them reflected in Sasuke eyes. They were both fucked; recklessly in love, with the end of summer inexorably heading their way. If anything, the tension between them escalated as a result. They kissed more passionately, sometimes running their hands through each other's hair, or hugging hard while they did. They always broke apart whenever that physical threshold came up. That point where it was stop or get naked. They would gaze at each other, panting, hurting, trying to find answers to their questions in the other's eyes-

_Why won't you stay with me?_

_Why don't you want me to touch you?_

…and then they would be kissing again, telling themselves they didn't care, didn't care, nothing mattered but that moment. Tomorrow would never come. Summer would never end, and they would always have right now, with their hot hands, pounding hearts, and hungry mouths.

But it _was_ ending. And Sasuke _was_ leaving. That knowledge was beneath every kiss, behind every shared glance, and it made the tension almost palpable.

* * *

No matter how they tried to deny it when alone, time was marked by Naruto's steady progress, and how the bedtime stories Sasuke requested every night grew in difficulty. It was marked by how the days grew hotter, and the kids less wild as they had something to occupy themselves at last. And it was marked by Sasuke inviting Naruto to his place for dinner at Itachi's request. Sasuke's birthday had come.

"I can't even remember the last time I celebrated my birthday," Sasuke said as they walked over from the home. "Probably when my parents lived. But there he was last night, saying to invite you because he's cooking. Think he said something about a cake, too."

Naruto smiled. "Cake. _Yes_. Wish I could have gotten you something, though." He hadn't a cent to his name. "I'll make you something, how's that?"

Sasuke waved a hand. "No big. When's your birthday again?"

"October. So why do you think he wants to celebrate now? Think he'll sing the b-day song?"

"Ugh, _stop_ it." Sasuke shuddered. "And I have no idea. But he's been sick since his service at the home."

"Sick? How?"

"I mean acting gross. Staring at me with these cartoon eyes. You know, the ones that are all big and shiny with repressed emotion. From me teaching those brats," Sasuke clarified when Naruto continued to frown.

"Oh. Haha! He's proud of you?" Naruto did a little skip and a hop.

"_Something_." Sasuke hunched his shoulders in discomfort. "Keeps smiling at me. Look, let's just get through this dinner as quickly and painlessly as possible, then we can go home."

Naruto's smile dwindled in awe. "You think of the tree house as home?"

"Yeah? I mean, I feel more at home there than I have in any place since my parents. What?" He looked over at Naruto's arrested expression.

"Nothing. Just…that makes me feel good."

"Don't make me cut you again."

Naruto tackled him, to which Sasuke protested loudly. But he tried to tackle Naruto in retaliation.

* * *

Itachi watched two laughing teens fall into the apartment and had to bite his lips to hold back his grin. Sasuke seemed to hate his tentative attempts at bridging their differences. "Right on time. Hungry?" he asked them.

Naruto hollered that he was starving, but Sasuke only eyed the dishes set out on their small table. "Take out?" he asked.

Itachi cleared his throat. "The roast suffered an accident."

Knowing Naruto's appetite, Sasuke was glad to see that the take out containers were plentiful. There were even more piled on the kitchen counter. They sat down to eat.

-oOo-

Dinner was quiet for the most part. Itachi asked Sasuke once if he wanted to do anything special tonight, but Sasuke only shook his head. Itachi, recognizing Sasuke's silence, turned to Naruto and pinned him with a bright stare. "I hear you'll be turning eighteen soon too."

"Uh, yeah. Where'd you hear that?" Sasuke had only just asked him when his birthday was, before they'd arrived.

"Iruka. Got plans?"

Naruto was silent for a long time, chewing thoughtfully. "Not really. I mean, I'll have to leave the home."

"Where will you go?"

"I don't know."

"What will you do?"

"Don't know that either. Don't know how to do anything."

Sasuke spoke up at last. "Naruto's a natural carpenter. And since he's learning how to read, I'm sure he can do some kind of job training somewhere."

"You won't be around to help him out with that, though, will you?" Itachi said off-handedly. He turned back to Naruto, ignoring Sasuke's heated glare. "What do you like to do besides carpentry?"

He asked Naruto a lot of questions that night, not just about what he liked to do, but which of the new books he was reading he liked best. What was the hardest part about learning to read? Did he like reading better than math? Was Sasuke a good boyfriend?

That last had Naruto choking on some rice. "Wha-_what? _He's not my boyfriend."

Itachi paused with his own chopsticks tucked into a corner of his mouth. He maneuvered his bite of food so he could speak, looking back and forth between Naruto and his brother. "He's not?"

"No," both boys chorused. Neither looked up from their food.

"I assumed, since you're living there, Sasuke, that you guys were going through boxes of condoms like-"

Sasuke stood up. "Want to see some of my books?" he asked Naruto loudly. Naruto left his unfinished food to immediately follow Sasuke to his room.

Itachi hid his laugh behind a napkin, almost crying in mirth. _Run all you want, little brother. Six months ago we wouldn't even have been in the same room, much less having dinner. Not even three months ago. Haven't joked with you since mom and dad. _

* * *

August was an oddly quiet month, compared to July. Sasuke announced with no small amount of relief that seeing as he wasn't teaching Naruto anymore, all other classes would stop as well. The children were sad, but knew better than to complain to Sasuke about it; they were terrified of incurring one of his beady-eyed frowns. Iruka made noises about himself and Hinata continuing the lessons. None of the children seemed interested in this, though. Sasuke might be feared, but his strict, inflexible mode of teaching was highly respected. Besides, as one of the older boys pointed out, since Iruka hadn't bothered teaching them before, why would he start now? That boy went without dessert that night.

As for Naruto, Sasuke brought him books daily. A variety of topics were introduced to him this way, including some subjects he would have received in school. These were on an elementary level, and he struggled with them, but that didn't stop him. Sasuke said he was far enough along now to teach himself, and Naruto did just that. By far the most invaluable things he received in aid of this venture were several dictionaries. One was a children's dictionary, which Naruto quickly outgrew, but the other two were for middle school and college respectively. Naruto was using the middle school one. He and Sasuke would eat when the latter got home, then spend long hours side by side, studying.

At night, when all studying was set aside, he and Sasuke would crawl up to their bedroom where a few exhausted yet blissful moments would be spent kissing and snuggling against each other. Then Naruto would pull out whatever book had been chosen as that night's story and begin reading. Two nights ago he'd begun a chapter book about a girl named Ramona Quimby. He would read until his eyes were closing, and Sasuke was snoring softly at his shoulder. When he finally gave in to sleep himself, he invariably had one of those dreams.

By day, he would get up when Sasuke did, and read until his eyes were grainy. Sasuke would come back and give him a mini writing assignment, whereupon he would practice penmanship and cursive, something Naruto privately thought was a product of hell. He hated it, but Sasuke said it was important despite handwriting being a lost art, as he put it.

-oOo-

And then it was the end of August. Sasuke showed up at the tree house a mere ninety minutes after leaving for school, with an odd expression on his face. Seeing it, Naruto couldn't decide if it was happy or sad. "What's wrong?"

Sasuke shrugged, then seemed to just wait there. Looking everywhere but at him. "I'm done. I passed. As of right now, I'm free. No institutions on my back."

All Naruto heard was the word 'free'. "Oh. I mean good. Passing and all. So…now what?"

Now Sasuke looked at him. The expression on Naruto's face was one of resignation, but there was more in those blue eyes. Hope, maybe. Fear that was almost masked by an effort at nonchalance. Almost, but not quite.

If he had to look at that expression for long, he'd go crazy. Naruto wouldn't ask again, but he would hear that question over and over in the silence. His face spoke volumes. _Now what? Now what, now what, now what?_

"Now…I guess I go home." _No! _Home meant so many things he just wasn't ready to face.

Naruto tried to swallow, but it seemed his throat had closed up. "This is your home."

"True…but." He held Naruto's stare.

"But?"

"I mean, I said I'd stay till the end of summer, then-"

"No. Just…don't. I'm not asking anything. Forget I said anything, okay? Just stay. Please? One more day? It's not even the end of summer yet. I read that summer isn't over till September twenty-something."

Something in Sasuke loosened. "Yeah…yeah, you're right. Psh, end of summer, what the fuck? We got _plenty_ of time." Few more weeks. No harm in a few more weeks. And this _was_ his home now.

Naruto smiled broadly in relief. The familiar routine of avoiding the elephant in the room was taken up once more.

* * *

For a wonder, they had a few days of fun. No summer school, Naruto reading…it was nice. Sasuke was able to take Naruto to the library once, followed by the bookstore, and then the park. Naruto noticed the way Sasuke's eyes habitually scanned people wherever he went, and wondered if Sasuke still stole things. When he'd been attending summer school, and studying a large part of each night, he didn't think so. Now that Sasuke was free again he might take up his old practices. _If he hasn't already. _Sasuke seemed to have an endless supply of money, as evidenced by the books he'd bought for him.

Sasuke asked one day, when they were sweating rivers in the home's kitchen, why there was no air conditioning. "How does this place stay open for business? I mean doesn't it have inspections? That sort of thing? You can't tell me a single bathroom, no A/C, and these few rooms for so many kids is regulation. Place should have been shut down or renovated years ago." He bit into his sandwich, but grimaced and threw it back down to his plate.

Naruto understood. It was too hot to eat. "Iruka said they would have been, but that would just mean re-homing the kids someplace else, and there's no place else. Not a whole lot of government funds come our way. Which sucks, because if I just had the supplies, I could rebuild this whole place. Add another wing at the very least. But that needs land, and there's definitely no money to buy the plot next to ours."

Sasuke gave him a funny look. "Dude. I know you're good with your hands, but seriously? You can renovate this place? _Rebuild_ it?"

"Yeah, why not? You seem surprised."

"Uh, I don't know…maybe because renovation is a lot more complicated than your tree house? That's just wood. This is plumbing and wiring and shit."

"Who do you think's been doing repairs here for the past five years? Only took seeing a repairman do something once or twice."

"Oh."

"Anyway, some of the books I got at the library are on construction and architecture, you know. Can't make out half the words, but the illustrations are handy. I'd need a crew, but I could totally do it. Lemme show you something." Polishing off his own sandwich, he took Sasuke to the tree house and pulled out a battered notebook. "See? Sketches I did. The bathroom would be enlarged like this. Here. Without the addition of new land, I'd have to build _up_. That would require me tearing down the home completely to redo the foundations maybe, but it's doable. There'd be a floor for boys, one for girls, and a bathroom at either end of each floor. Six bedrooms to a floor. A floor for the kids below five, who need different care. Mess hall, kitchen, and rec room down on the first floor. Top floor can have staff bedrooms. What do you think?"

What did he think? "I think you've found your calling." He took the notebook and flipped through the pages more slowly. "These are amazing. Has Iruka seen them?"

"Yeah. He says it's a nice dream, but even if we somehow got the money, we'd still need to hire people to do the work, and the extra staff this place really needs. Can't have floors of kids with only him and Hinata." He took the book and put it away. "What's a calling?"

"A dictionary would say it's a strong urge toward a particular way of life or career. I say it's what you know you're born to do."

"Oh. You mean how I said that being a doctor isn't what you do it's who you are?"

"Yes."

"So that's your calling, then?"

Sasuke didn't answer.

And after that, he was mysteriously absent a few hours on some nights. Naruto didn't ask where he was. After all, Sasuke wasn't obligated to him in any way, a fact that put acid in his belly. He wanted to know every detail of Sasuke's life –the way he had when he'd been going to summer school- but the fact was that Sasuke _didn't_ owe him anything. They were friends and that was it. He'd already gotten much more from Sasuke than from all the other people in his life combined. If the guy felt like he needed some time away, who was he to bitch about it?

Didn't stop him from hating the hours Sasuke was gone, though. Or from wondering if he really was pushing him away somehow.

But Sasuke always came back. His normally dour face would be wreathed in smiles the minute he saw the tree house, and more often than not he'd have a ton of take-out with him. If there was anything he loved more than Sasuke and learning to read, it was take-out. Those smiles alone were almost enough to make him ignore the way Sasuke sometimes reverted to his silent moodiness when he thought he was unobserved. But whenever he and Naruto were talking or reading or eating or laughing, all was fine.

* * *

He tried to think if he'd ever had a stretch of time since his parents had died, where there was nothing bugging him. A time when he wasn't angry or hurting or focusing on his unshakeable guilt every hour of every day. He didn't think so. But then, he hadn't had anyone in his life. Anyone besides Itachi. Someone who…did what? Accepted him? Itachi accepted him. Someone who was there for him? Itachi was there for him too, unfailingly so. What was it Naruto did, then, that made the thought of leaving freeze his insides? How did he end up loving him?

He thought about these things whenever he was away from the home. He never stayed away long. Just long enough to reaffirm to himself, each time, that a permanent separation from Naruto would likely fuck him up something ugly. He _needed_ Naruto. Naruto knew the worst about him, stuff Itachi didn't even know, and still wanted him. Well…sort of wanted him.

_He still doesn't want me fucking him._

Sasuke had no idea what that was about, but he couldn't blame Naruto. Guy was…not idealistic, but definitely the relationship type, he could tell. Then too, he'd been the first one to tell Itachi that they weren't boyfriends. Maybe sex was something he only wanted to do with a boyfriend? Well, he didn't do boyfriend. Ever.

_But you want to. Admit it, if he said he wanted you to be his you'd jump at the chance._

Pulling up three blocks from the home, Sasuke hesitated. They were a week into September now. The looks hadn't been present at first, but the more time passed, the more he saw that unasked question on Naruto's face. _Now what? When are you leaving? How much longer do we have? _

That was a good question. One he'd avoided answering for himself because he just…didn't…know. It ate at him. Sometimes when they were together, it would swamp his mind completely. If he left…well, he could start over. Be someone else. Someone who hadn't killed his parents, who didn't have a brother whose eyes asked the same questions Naruto's silences did. Someone…new. Good. Undamaged. That thought held a lot of appeal. Just cut loose and leave it all behind.

_It'd still be there though. Just because you're not looking at it doesn't mean it's not there._

Turning, Sasuke walked away from the home.

His past would be with him no matter where he went. Sitting in the background, shaping his new persona by virtue of the fact that he'd be trying to do everything Uchiha Sasuke wouldn't or couldn't do. And all that aside, the thought of leaving, just the thought, made him do a slow burn. He could leave his brother. But he could not willingly walk away from Naruto. Just walk away without looking back? It felt like he was stabbing himself in the chest. If he stayed, though…

It would mean a lot of things. Dealing with…shit. Ugh.

Naruto would be turned loose in a month. He'd thought about taking Naruto on the road and just being with him. They could face the world together, but the idea, though attractive, had little appeal. He knew Naruto. And he knew Naruto saw a lot in him that he didn't see himself. He might be okay with the grifter lifestyle for awhile, but eventually he'd expect Sasuke to do something. Make something of himself, and he'd be right. Besides, he was honest enough to admit that he was only able to shit around Oto the way he did because he was free to; he had a home and a brother to support him. If he were on his own, he'd have to be legit. Find a place, a job. Feed himself. Grifting did not lend itself to the straight and narrow way of living, so that option was out.

He could stay here and get a job. Which he'd probably lose in a week because he hated bending for other people's rules. He would not flip burgers in some greasy spoon, or take orders from someone who was barely above a middle school level.

It really only left one option. And to do that, he'd need to face his brother. Well, not really. He supposed he could get by without squaring things away with Itachi, but what did he want? Really, what did he want out of life?

_To be whole. And not hurt. And Naruto. I want Naruto no matter what I do._

The whole subject of Naruto was something else he spent a lot of time ignoring. He wanted the guy, but didn't come right out and pursue him aggressively because a) he had nothing to offer him –was actually living in _his_ house- and b) Naruto might reject him outside of bed as well. That. That, he would rather die than live through. If he stayed, he'd have to face that.

Naruto would want him to fix it with his bro, too. Would want him to be somebody. The guy he envisioned having good days. The guy that gave him chills. And Sasuke wanted to be that guy. Someone worthy of Naruto's respect.

* * *

The key in the door only startled him a moment. He hadn't seen Sasuke since his birthday. There'd been a phone call from the woman running the summer school. Sasuke had gotten his diploma. A call to the home had confirmed that his brother was still living there, so he hadn't skipped town yet. Only a matter of time, though. At seeing his bro slide through the door, he figured this was it. Goodbye.

Itachi put his pen down, crossed his arms, and leaned back in his chair. His muscles were already tensing up in dread.

Most of the lights were off. Just his light in the kitchen nook burning, so Sasuke was a dark shadow amongst other shadows. He could see him waiting by the living room couch. Just standing there. "Sasuke?"

"I can't…can't stop seeing it, you know?"

The voice, floating out of the dark like that, at once had him rising out of his chair, and hanging back. "Sasuke, are you-"

"It's part of why I _hate_ coming home. Here. Coming here to this apartment. Every time I open this door, there you are, your nose in those fucking books. Making me remember. Same deal with school. You put me there. Being there reminds me of you, which reminds me of them. And I can't stop seeing them. I can't stop seeing them lying on the floor, their blood on my hands. Can't."

When had he gone into the living room? He didn't know, but he was there, eyes adjusted enough to see that he was standing right in front of Sasuke. Hands held up as if to catch his brother or pull him into a hug, but not touching him. Sasuke was looking somewhere to his right. The tears rolling down his face rocked him where he stood. "_Sasuke."_

"I just want to have a good day. You know? Like Naruto said. A good day, one good day, where I'm just…amazing. I'm doing everything right and being the guy mom and dad always knew I'd be.

"But I can't. _Can't. _No matter what I do, or where I go, I can't stop seeing that night, or feeling the guilt, or hating you. I hate you most of all, I can't stop, can't stop, c-can't s-s-_stop_."

There was more. How hating him was the only thing making the guilt bearable, the only thing holding him together. When he reached for Sasuke, the kid fought. Punched, kicked, cursed, spat furious words of denial at him…but then his brother's shivering body was in his arms. He had no idea when or how they'd ended up rocking on the floor, but the tears were almost his undoing. Fuck it, he'd been undone the moment he realized it was happening at last; this confrontation was ten years in the making.

The crying was brutal. Not easy for his brother to do and certainly not easy for him to listen to, but the worst of it only lasted some minutes. He held Sasuke tightly while it lasted, feeling the heat of those tears soak through his shirt. Only when Sasuke spitefully blew his nose in that same shirt and called him an asshole did he breathe easier.

There was relative silence for a time. Unsurprisingly, Sasuke moved away and put some distance between them. Sat across from him, cross-legged, forehead cradled in one palm.

"I can't get out of the shadow of that night," Sasuke hiccuped. "I can't stop feeling guilty and hating myself. God, I hate myself _so_ _much_, and you. You don't deserve it which just makes me hate you more."

Itachi almost laughed. It was such a childish statement, but he'd realized long ago that part of Sasuke had never moved on from that night. Part of him had just never grown up.

But he'd had his brother in his arms. Actually _in his arms_. Sasuke had been broken. Had healed incorrectly. And now he had broken again. It was up to him to set the break cleanly this time so his brother could be whole. "Listen to me," he said quietly. "I'm only going to say this once. Are you listening?"

Sasuke nodded and Itachi moved over so that they were sitting side by side. After a moment, he carefully put an arm around his slumped shoulders.

"It happened. It was awful. Unfair. But it happened. I know you feel guilty and that nothing I say will ever change your mind about how they died. I know that. All I can do is help you see things from another angle. Help you see that doctors lose patients all the time. People with more experience than you had. Renowned physicians, decorated surgeons, star interns and residents. The first time it happens is hard for all of them…but it happens, Sasuke. That it was mom and dad sucks, but we don't have control over life and death. Nobody does, I don't care how skilled they are. You tried to help them and they died. That's it. You could have left them alone and they might have died. They could have gotten to the hospital and been treated by Tsunade herself and they might _still_ have died. It was their time. They went. You were there. You didn't hurt them. Didn't kill them. They just died when you were there. And you were small and alone and afraid."

Sasuke was still. Listening.

Itachi risked tightening his arm around him. This position they were in was exactly how they'd been on that night so many years ago. Him arriving with the paramedics to find Sasuke hysterical. Sitting on the floor with him, holding him while their parents were worked on. Watching while resuscitation failed. He imagined that Sasuke was seeing them all over again too, as they'd been. So still and bloody.

"Let me help you," he said into the black hair beneath his chin. Sasuke didn't move when he put his lips in that hair and left a small kiss. "Let me shoulder the pain with you. I can help, if you let me. You're not alone, and you did nothing wrong. I believe that. And I believe in you. Just let it go. It can't be changed, so it has to be let go. Can you do that?"

"No. I don't know."

Itachi gently pushed him up so he could see his face. "Can you try?"

Sasuke was silent for a long time. He had to hand it to his bro, the guy didn't coddle him or try to convince him he was wrong to feel guilty. He just firmly believed it hadn't been his fault. _Really_ believed. Stated his reasons for believing it and then asked him to try and live with it. To let him help.

He didn't even say anything about being hated. Didn't matter to him, Sasuke guessed. Because he knew deep down he wasn't hated.

Huh. Something that had been such an integral part of his life. Something that had _ruled_ his life for ten damn years. And it wasn't even real. Just a front. A mask for the real deal. His brother knew him._ I don't know myself._

And he didn't know if he could let it go. If he could bear releasing all the hate –false or not- and the guilt that had kept him from feeling the pain of his parents' loss. How they'd died and his own questionable part in it was wrapped up in that pain and he just didn't know if he'd be able to stand it without those shields in place.

_Naruto._

Itachi was staring at him, he saw. Waiting to see if he had the sac to stop running. Waiting to catch him if he fell. Always waiting.

"I'll try."


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Epilogue is done, and being edited.

* * *

Chapter 11

In all the years he'd known Naruto, he'd never known the kid to show worry. Not until this summer. He'd been wild as a boy, and sullen as he'd gotten older. But never worried. He didn't do worry, ever. Naruto was the one who was usually calm in a crisis, dependably clear-headed during any of the home's minor upheavals. His anger was usually directed inward.

Watching him pace up and down the main room was reminiscent of when Sasuke had first begun coming to the home. Then, too, Naruto had worried. Iruka watched him go to the window to jerk the curtains aside for the hundredth time.

"Where _is_ he?"

"I don't know," Iruka said. All the other children were asleep. It was nearing ten pm. Just him and Naruto.

"He's never been gone this long. You think something's wrong?"

"Honestly? No."

"Has to be. Why would he stay away? This is his home."

Iruka considered the wisdom of saying anything, before unfolding his arms to join Naruto at the window. "I think Sasuke has a home, Naruto. And-"

"No." Naruto dropped the curtain to turn and face him.

"_And_," Iruka continued, surprised to see the way Naruto was now able to look down on him a bit. "I think the summer's over. He's been staying away from the home more and more often and now he's just…gone. All right? I know you miss him, but I never thought he'd stay as long as he did. You had a friend. That was-"

"What? _What?_ What are you saying, oh my fucking God SHUT UP!" Naruto roared this last at Iruka's face, pulling back from him as if horrified. "What, you're saying that's it? That he won't come back _ever?_"

"He's definitely surprised me, but I never thought of him as the commitment type, Naruto. He's a drifter. Intelligent, but then intelligent people tend to get bored easily by…" His eyes lowered.

"No, go on," Naruto raged. "Bored by what? Dumbass people like me? Because he said I'm not dumb. And he wouldn't just leave me like that. He wouldn't. He _likes_ me. He _wants_ me."

Iruka studied the furious set to Naruto's face. The flared nostrils and lowered brows. The way his fists rhythmically clenched and unclenched. "All right. If you say so."

-oOo-

The knock on the door had Naruto whirling around. When he'd thrown it open, already chewing Sasuke out for scaring him, they were both surprised.

"Expecting someone else?" Neji said.

Iruka had to gently tug him out of the way by a handful of his shirt so that Neji could enter. Even so, Naruto stared. The whole time Iruka was quietly inquiring about Neji's health and Neji was answering, he couldn't seem to process what he was seeing.

Neji's head was shorn. His hair was a short, thick, silky cap of brown that had a few longer layers hanging between his pale eyes in a point. This was a shock, true, but it was more than that. Finally working up enough moisture in his mouth to moisten his lips, Naruto said, "Dude."

The conversation broke off. Neji looked in Naruto's direction, smiled, then sauntered over. His brows rose up in question. All Naruto could do was shake his head and lift a hand up to gesture at the rest of Neji's appearance.

Neji threw his head back in a laugh. "You like?"

"Huh…uh…" Naruto closed his eyes as his face reddened. Cleared his throat. "Thought you were in the hospital."

"Still? Nah. I had more surgery-" Neji ran a large hand over his hair. "But I was discharged a couple of weeks later. Had some headaches for a while. Spent the rest of the summer working out. Getting back full use of my arm, and the full range of motion in my torso. I'm good now. As you can see," he added with a chuckle.

Naruto thought it rather hard _not_ to see. Neji had been athletic before. Solid. Now he was at least twenty-five pounds heavier. All muscle. "For the Academy?"

Neji's smile fell away. "Academy only takes people who've had no major health issues in their past. Brain surgery pretty much canceled my plans."

"Oh…even though you're fine? You _are_ fine now?"

"Completely. I came by to thank Sasuke…and to see if you were okay."

Naruto blinked. "Why wouldn't I be okay?"

Just then Hinata came into the room, shouldering her purse. Iruka intercepted her a moment, speaking to her while Neji stepped closer to Naruto, who'd been briefly distracted by Hinata's arrival. He jumped a bit at returning his attention to Neji to find the guy so close to him. "Actually," Neji said, "I came to see if you were up for more than friendship."

"…Huh?"

Studying the wide, confused eyes, Neji leaned down an inch. "Are you and Sasuke a thing?"

"I…what?"

"Hinata says you guys might be a thing. Are you?"

"What-" Naruto pulled his head back a bit, giving himself room. "What's that mean, a thing?"

"Is he your boyfriend?"

"Oh. No?"

"No?"

"No."

"You guys sleep in the same bed."

"…Yeah."

"You guys do more than sleep?"

"L-like what?"

Neji straightened up at last. "Just want to make sure I'm not marking someone else's territory."

Something about this conversation made Naruto very nervous. His heart was thudding in agitation. "Yeah. Okay." As if he had one clue in fuck what that even meant.

Those pale eyes raked him from head to toe in one long, slow glance of consideration. "Well. I'll be in touch then. 'Kay?"

He nodded. Licked his lips again, which had Neji smirking. Naruto felt his face heat up.

A minute later, Hinata left with her cousin. Iruka came over and waited for Naruto's puzzled eyes to leave the closed door. "The fuck was all that?" Naruto said shakily.

"I think," Iruka said with an attempt at gravity, "That Neji has just announced his intention to pursue you."

"Pursue me? What…you mean… Okay, what do you mean?"

Speaking slowly and clearly, Iruka said, "I believe he's interested in you. Attracted to you. And he intends to act on his interest and attraction. You, having said you're available, just gave him the green light."

Naruto's mouth dropped into an oval of shock. "I never gave him a green light!"

Iruka laughed. Made his way to the back of the home where he slept, and just laughed.

* * *

Left to lock up the home, Naruto paused with his hand on the kitchen light switch. He was half out the screen door to the backyard, looking at the wooden corners of his tree house, where they were visible through the leaves. He'd be spending the night alone. He'd spent very few nights alone this summer, and it felt strange. Worse, he didn't know why Sasuke was away.

It wasn't until moody, unanswered questions of Sasuke's whereabouts had finally subsided that Iruka's laughing statement came back to him. By then he'd tossed and turned for hours on his mattress. And then, while spread-eagled on his back, Neji's questions came to him, and his own answers to them, and he almost groaned aloud. Almost, because Sasuke's absence hurt him, and the realization that someone else might be interested in him might in turn hurt Sasuke. If he knew. And the idea of getting Sasuke back for leaving him like this was soothing. Fucked up, but soothing nonetheless.

_And he _isn't_ your boyfriend. He might have left the city entirely. This morning might have been the last time you'll ever see him again._

That thought made his heart do an alarming knockety-knock in his chest. As if someone had it in their fist and was squeezing as hard as they could, and his heart was struggling to free itself. A few deep, calming breaths through flared nostrils settled the worst of the arrhythmia, but he kept one palm over his chest anyway, waiting for the steady thump to resume. Once it had, he closed his eyes and willed himself to sleep.

* * *

Sasuke wasn't there in the morning. Or the afternoon. Or the next day, or the one after that.

Naruto, operating at a level of suppressed panic that made him physically ill, tried to tell himself it was for the best. A clean break. Panic aside, he grieved, and would have been the last person to realize or admit that he did any such thing. Others noticed. Iruka saw the way he stopped eating. How he spoke as little as possible, and stayed in his tree house most of the time.

If he did speak, it was in one word answers to questions asked of him…until he stopped answering entirely. The questions were all the same anyway. 'Are you all right? Do you want some lunch? Is there anything I can do?'

Iruka and Hinata soon left him alone. It was clear that he wasn't all right, and that there was nothing anyone could do. Sasuke had left, and that was that. What pained them the most was how, one morning, they heard a series of violent, raging screams coming from the tree house. When they went out to the backyard to investigate, it was to find a storm of books and notebooks being hurled out of the tree house window, to land in heaps on the ground. The screaming went on for a long time. Sasuke's name was heard more than once.

When Neji came by a few days later, Iruka and Hinata watched warily, as he was informed by one of the children that Naruto was out back. Iruka looked on from the kitchen window as Neji made his way out the screen door.

Neji strolled the length of the backyard. Stopped by the pile of books at its base. Studied the fluttering pages, some of which were torn. Then leapt nimbly up the ladder and disappeared.

Iruka exchanged a guarded look with Hinata.

-oOo-

It barely registered that someone was entering his space. He knew it wasn't Sasuke; Sasuke's approach was always heralded by huffing and puffing. Despite climbing the ladder for an entire summer, the dude never could seem to accustom himself to it. No, this person jumped in, bounded in, as if the ascent hadn't been ay trouble.

Neji's eyes met his, until Naruto looked away with a snort. "What."

"Told you I'd be by."

"Leave me alone."

"So you guys broke up?"

This earned a frown and more eye contact. "What?"

Neji, now wandering around the main room, stepped over Naruto's crossed ankles to study the furnishings. "You said you two weren't a thing, but clearly you were. Hinata says Sasuke's up and left, and you're pissed about it. You guys broke up."

Naruto spent some seconds blinking at the fascinating sight of Neji's muscular ass clad in faded jeans. "We weren't…like that."

The ass turned, presenting Naruto with a bulging crotch. At least a full minute passed before he realized he was staring, and that Neji was watching him stare. Glancing up at the amused grey eyes, Naruto forced a cough and used this pathetic excuse to avert his eyes.

"Whatever you were, you were into him. He's gone, now you're doing a Taylor Swift."

"A who?"

"Look." Neji came over and squatted, straddling Naruto's thighs. "I'm interested. Okay? Let's just get that out into the open here and now. I'm interested in you. Not in just fucking. You. M'kay? I get that you're hurting right now, but I'd like to know if I've got a shot."

Neji's squatting position put his crotch within touching distance. Naruto was visited by the overwhelming urge to reach forward and cup that bulge, right where it strained the seams of Neji's jeans the most. He had to consciously force himself to keep his eyes on Neji's face, also disturbingly close. What was wrong with him? "A shot at…?"

"You? I'm not promising marriage or anything, but I want more than a fuck, as you thought earlier this summer. Friendship. More than friends. I'm game. You in? Or do you need time?" The grey eyes crinkled in a questioning smile.

Had he the language or awareness of self to realize that Neji's open pursuit was a balm to the insecurities he'd lived with all summer, Naruto would still have hesitated. Just having Neji in the tree house felt like a betrayal to Sasuke. But what really unnerved him was how powerfully attracted he was to Neji. He hadn't realized it until a second ago, at seeing the smile, but Neji's tall, wide-shouldered, strapping authority made him feel things he'd wanted to feel all his life. Safe. Wanted. And he felt secure in Neji's articulation of what he wanted from him and why. Unlike Sasuke, who left him wondering what they were. Did he think he could feel for Neji what he felt for Sasuke? No. Never. But that was okay, because what he had with Sasuke was almost sacred. Never to be felt with another. Neji wanted friendship, or more than that, and that was fine. It was more than fine, it was what he needed right now. Something to ease the pain of Sasuke.

"Soooo…" Neji drawled, when Naruto only continued to stare. "Dinner tonight? I can pick you up. Or…we could head out now, spend the day doing things. No park, I promise."

If he weren't so pissed and resentful of Sasuke's absence he wouldn't even be considering this. But Sasuke was leaving. Or had already left. And Neji wanted to spend time with him. _And I need somebody right now. _"Okay."

* * *

Those first days with his brother were hell. Pure, black hell. Sasuke knew he meant well, but Itachi just wasn't much help.

The simple act of deciding to face the night his parents died did a lot more than he thought it would. He hadn't thought he'd undergo such a drastic change, that his emotions would be subject to such a cataclysmic reversal and upheaval. Simply saying that he would _try_ broke down every barrier he'd erected to protect himself from the pain of that night. It flooded every pore, every crevice of his being, and he bathed in it.

Had he known he was capable of so much crying, he'd have thrown up in disgust. He threw up anyway, having regressed to hysterics on one or two occasions. He seemed to talk a lot when the crying was at its worst. He kept seeing the blood, all the blood, and the paramedics covering his parents' faces with sheets, and then the coroner coming to zip them in body bags and take them away. His brother was there in those memories, and there with him in the present, and for some time –he didn't know how long- he was too confused to know which was which or when was when.

Then he slept.

He woke up 28 hours later, face down in his bed, and said, "Itachi."

Movement to his side resolved itself into his brother's haggard face. Seemed he'd just woken up as well. "You had an episode," Itachi said. "Had to sedate you." He gestured to the nightstand, where a small glass bottle and syringe sat. "You hadn't had one since mom and dad died. Back then you had a couple every week. We hospitalized you in the psyche ward for a few weeks. Remember?"

He didn't. But that wasn't why he'd called his brother. "Itachi."

"Yeah, man." Itachi moved to sit on the edge of the bed. "I'm here."

"I killed them."

His brother gave a long, low sigh that might have been a curse. "I thought we'd been over this."

Sasuke displayed an unusual amount of energy by turning over quickly and sitting up. "No. _You_ went over it. You laid out your argument for why you don't believe it's true, and I tried, okay? I tried to get with that and see it from your side, but I've been doing some thinking of my own. Ten damn years worth, and the truth is simple. _I killed them_. Trying to tell myself I didn't is what's fucking me up."

Itachi sprung from the bed, startling Sasuke into silence. He watched his older brother pacing up and down a minute, before flinching when Itachi turned.

Itachi's face was wild. "Fine. All right? Fine! You killed them…but I'm the one who left you there!"

"Wha-"

"_Me_. I left a _kid_ in there with two wounded adults, _by himself_," Itachi roared. "You want to talk blame, let's talk blame. Let's talk about what _I've_ been thinking on for ten damn years, yeah? _I_ left you. You did what you did because I ran instead of picking up the fucking phone. _I'm_ the reason you tried to save them, _I'm_ the reason you broke when you couldn't, and _I'm_ the reason you've been fucked up for all the years since. It's _my_ fault, _mine_, I did this."

Sasuke shifted carefully, lest a sudden movement bring on violence as well as more yelling. "No, you-"

"I tried! I tried to fix it. Sent you to school. Tried to be there for you. Tried to-" Itachi did a weird snorting cough, and Sasuke realized his brother was about to cry. "Tried to hold on to you, to keep you from slipping away. Why do you think I took up medicine?" Here, Itachi shoved his fingers into his hair, clutching it hard a moment. "You have no idea how much I hate medicine. Hate it, fucking _hate_ it, but I was trying to hold on to my brother, any part of him, any part of how he used to be."

He dropped his hands, leaving his hair loose and wild around his face as he finally met Sasuke's eyes with tears rolling down his cheeks. "Itachi," Sasuke said uncomfortably.

"You hate me. Maybe you don't, not really, but I think you do a little. At least a little. You have every reason to. But, you know…you're not the only one who lost parents. I lost them too. And I lost you. You want to say you killed them? Fine. But you didn't do it by yourself. I played my part. They're gone, though. You're not. And as bad as losing them was, it's nowhere near as bad as watching someone you love die a little each year, the way I've watched you. So if this whole 'I killed them' shtick is some prelude to you leaving here for good, save it. I can't take anymore. Really…I can't." Itachi's face crumpled. "I _need_ you, okay? _Fuck_." This last was spat out in disgust, as Itachi turned and covered his face with the hem of his T-shirt.

Sasuke sat stiff and silent, wondering what to do. He couldn't recall ever seeing his brother cry like this, and he'd never, but _never_ said the things he'd revealed tonight.

A shiver worked through him. So much of the past had been churned up between the night he'd come home and now that it was easy for him to look at his brother's shaking back and remember the boy he'd been. Back then Itachi had been a solemn, serious brother with dreams of entering the Academy. He'd been a good brother, making time for Sasuke when he wasn't training himself. Sometimes they'd had brotherly moments, when it was just the two of them. Sasuke remembered how those moments were laced with a tight, almost unbearable love he'd had for Itachi…and something hard and unyielding inside him cracked. It crumbled, and dissolved, so that he was inundated with that love once again. With it, the thought of his brother also in pain all these years sent him bouncing off his bed to throw himself at Itachi's back.

It couldn't be called a hug. It was violent, silent, and stiff-armed, but he squeezed his brother hard, as if he could murder Itachi's misery that way. He even dug the point of his chin into Itachi's shoulder for good measure. The thought of his brother hurting was suddenly intolerable. Itachi was the one who had it together, who was undamaged, and normal; the idea of him in pain beneath that façade made Sasuke grit his teeth and squeeze, squeeze, _squeeze_ until he was shaking with the effort. It was a denial of his brother's hurt, a negation of it.

His brother needed him. "I'm here," he whispered.

Itachi, wincing at the hug, put a hand over both of Sasuke's, where they were clasped over his chest. "You haven't been, though."

"I'm here _now_." In some dark, amorphous part of Sasuke's mind he understood that if he'd known from the start how ripped up his brother was he himself would never have gotten as messed up as he did. Feeling Itachi's hot tears land on his clasped hands, he squeezed harder. "I'm here now."

-oOo-

After, they were awkward. Hands shoved in their pockets, or under their armpits, as they faced each other, and staring fixedly at their feet.

This period of silence gave Sasuke a revelation. An argument _could_ be made for him having killed his parents, just as one could be made for his brother's culpability- itself a new and fascinating concept, if an ugly one. But if he believed, as he surely did, that an equal argument could be made for Itachi's innocence, he must then follow the same logic and say that one could be made for his as well.

But he wasn't, he concluded. He wasn't innocent, nor was he quite guilty. Was there no middle ground?

"It was an accident," Sasuke said slowly, tasting the words on his tongue. "I did it, but I didn't mean to do it."

Itachi nodded. "I know. And I shouldn't have left you, but I did. I panicked. Bolted."

It was painful to acknowledge for both of them, but it was a cleansing pain. Like pulling a thorn out of a festering wound. Sasuke raised his eyes and found Itachi looking at him. "It was an accident. And…I'll live with it." This he could do. Now that he could look it in the face, and knew the extent of Itachi's own feelings of guilt. "I'll live with it."

Again, Itachi nodded. "So will I. Nothing else we can do."

It was a heavy weight. Sasuke took a deep breath, expanding his lungs for what felt like the first time in years, and the weight seemed easier. "How come you never told me?"

Itachi lifted one shoulder in a shrug. "You were so unapproachable. After those first few weeks, once you'd been let out of the hospital, the subject was off-limits. You didn't talk about it, or let anyone else talk about it. Plus…I don't know, I was ashamed. _Am_ ashamed. I should have been the one with his head screwed on straight. I was your older brother. Supposed to take care of you. I left you there, man."

"Well. Like I said, I'm here now." He watched his brother press a thumb and forefinger to his eyes, face clenched against more tears. He could relate; it was several moments before he felt in control of himself enough to say the rest. "I'm done running. I'm staying."

-oOo-

The next morning he woke up, saw the sunlight all over his room, and smelled pancakes cooking. Upon leaving his room he found Itachi at the stove with a dishtowel over one shoulder. There was a glance between them that they each quickly looked away from. Last night's revelations and admissions sat between them like an unwieldy burden. It would take some getting used to.

His eyes fell on the books Itachi normally spent his time with. They were strewn across the table, as usual.

The medical books hadn't been touched in days.

Sasuke wandered over to them and ran his finger across an embossed title. Flipped the cover, turned a few pages, then let them riffle shut. "I want to go to med school," he announced.

Itachi brought two plates stacked with eggs, pancakes, and sausages over to the table. "You sure?"

"Completely. It's what I want."

"Registration for MCATs opens next month," Itachi said, mouth full.

Sasuke eyed the books they'd stacked on the floor. "I'll be signing up."

"I see. And…Naruto?"

Sasuke froze. "Shit."

"Yeah…he might miss you."

"Fuck that, I haven't seen him in _days_." He sat there with a wedge of pancake dangling from his fork. "What's it been, three days?"

"Try eight," Itachi snorted. "Hey! Where you going?"

The door to the apartment slammed behind Sasuke.

* * *

"Naruto's not here," Iruka said once Sasuke had checked the tree house. "Neji took him out for the day. Same as yesterday. Where've you been?"

He ignored the children clustering around him. "Family issues. And I was sedated. Neji…" Something about that burned his insides. What- oh, right. Neji had wanted to fuck Naruto. "Naruto's _out_ with Neji? Where? And how could you let him take Naruto anywhere after what happened the last time? How can you even _trust_ Neji?"

"I think Neji's learned his lesson. So has Naruto." His eyes bored into Sasuke's.

"Man, whatever. Judge me all you want." He was already heading for the door.

"Sasuke."

Sasuke turned around at the quiet tone. "Look, if you know where they are-"

"I don't. I do know that you hurt Naruto. Left with no word. Naruto's had a hard week without you. If Neji can give him things you can't, I think you should let him. It would be kinder to Naruto than leading him on, if you understand my meaning."

What Sasuke understood was that he'd come to the home to find all Naruto's books scattered beneath the tree house in an obvious statement of rage. He'd expected to find Naruto a bit pissed, but happy to see him. Honestly, staying away for 8 days didn't seem like _that_ big a deal. Not enough to start hanging with another guy. Naruto had to have known he'd come back, right? If he could accept Sasuke's past, couldn't he accept 8 measly days of separation? What the fuck, how did he just _go_ _off_ with Neji? "I'll be back later," was all he said.

* * *

Naruto stopped on the home's doorstep that evening, but only because Neji put a hand on his arm to prevent him from opening the door. "Hey," Neji said. And when Naruto turned, there was Neji's face, blocking out the wan light from the street lamp as it closed in for a kiss.

Neji smelled good, Naruto noted. His cologne wasn't overwhelming. Something light and clean and masculine, much as Neji himself was. All of Neji's face was in shadow, only his half-closed eyes catching a bit of light. They were silvery pale as they focused on his mouth. He could even feel Neji's breath, where it tingled across his lips. He wanted it. Wanted Neji to kiss him. But he said, "Don't."

"I'm sorry?" Neji didn't quite pull back; he hovered there, an inch away from Naruto's mouth.

Naruto cleared his throat. "Don't kiss me."

Now Neji did pull back, straightening to his full height. "Why not?"

"Because I like you."

"That seems like a reason _to_ kiss, not avoid it. Am I missing something?" Neji's head tipped sideways in question.

Naruto turned so his back was leaning against the door, giving Neji his profile. "I _like_ you. A lot. I'll be the first to say I don't know anything about the whole 'more than friends' thing, but…I kind of think I should feel more than like if I'm going to be kissing someone."

"Not necessarily. People kiss for a lot less."

"I don't think I'm one of those kinds of people then. Because there _is_ someone I kiss, and even if we aren't a thing, like you said, he's more than my friend."

"Sasuke."

"Sasuke," Naruto sighed.

"Well. He's not here. And I am."

Naruto looked over at him. Neji, seeing the serious expression in those blue eyes that he couldn't seem to stop thinking about, stopped breathing. He almost missed what was being said.

"-I like you, but I'm really screwed up."

"I see."

"I do want to be friends, though. Bring my grand total up to two. I'll be leaving the home soon, and I'm going to need a friend."

Neji studied him for a long time, hands in his pockets. "I'm never going to get a kiss from you, am I."

Naruto looked down at his feet. He had on new sneakers that Sasuke had brought home one day with the take-out. First new pair of shoes he'd ever owned. "Probably not, no."

"I can fight for you, if you say someday. If I've got a shot, I can fight for you. I don't give up easily. So is it not right now, or definitely a no? Because if it's just the timing-"

"Neji."

"…Okay."

Naruto stared at his feet until he heard Neji moving down the home's front walk. "You coming back?" he asked without looking up.

When he got no answer, he looked around to find that Neji was gone.

And Sasuke was leaning against a tree not too far away, watching him.

-oOo-

Sasuke said nothing as he strolled over, so Naruto had no idea of knowing how much he'd heard or what he'd seen. It was a minute before he reminded himself that there had been nothing to see or hear. His guilt stemmed from the momentary attraction he'd had for Neji, not from anything Sasuke could have witnessed. By the time Sasuke made it over to him, he had himself more or less under control.

Except he hadn't seen Sasuke in days, and it only hit him now, as Sasuke was stepping onto the stoop to stand in front him, that he hadn't been able to breathe in all that time. Some tortuous machine that had been inserted into his skin and cranked tighter with each passing day suddenly loosened. Tension he hadn't known he'd been carrying released. A headache he'd been ignoring for days withdrew its claws from his brain. Acid that had been burning his stomach settled down. His lungs sucked in a deep breath, another, then another. Sasuke was back; he could breathe.

"Hey," Sasuke said.

_I love you. _"Hey."

Sasuke made a show of looking in the direction Neji had gone. "Came by earlier but you were out."

"You were gone."

"Yeah."

"Where were you?"

"Not out here. Tree house."

"Okay."

For once, Naruto used the ladder. His hands and feet barely touched thing as he went up, and he spent interminable seconds waiting for Sasuke to finish his ascent before he was able to look at him and try to assess what might be coming. Could be Sasuke was about to say he was leaving. Maybe he'd been off finalizing his departure plans. Naruto found himself cracking his knuckles nervously, and stopped. His hands were shaking. All of him was shaking.

Sasuke took longer than usual climbing up. He'd been waiting in front of the home for nearly an hour by the time he saw Neji and Naruto walking up. He hadn't been able to hear whatever was said between them on the stoop, but he'd seen Neji bend close to Naruto's face. Thanks to his angle, he hadn't been able to see the kiss itself. It had been short, that much he'd seen. And after, Naruto had looked sad. Right now Naruto looked panicked. Well, he should. Caught in the act.

Naruto wasn't his. He had to remind himself of that fact.

_Fuck that_. "You kissed Neji."

"What?" Naruto's eyes went wide. "No I didn't."

"I saw you."

"You saw wrong. He almost did, but I stopped him."

"Naruto-"

"_I didn't kiss Neji_."

The blue eyes darkened to a color Sasuke had never seen before. Something dangerous. The rage and jealousy stewing inside him was abruptly neutralized. Swept away by a flood of love and possessiveness that nearly choked him. _Damn you, Naruto. Damn you. _

He managed a nod. Naruto's face calmed somewhat at seeing it. "Well." Sasuke cleared his throat. "I-"

"Where were you?"

Right. He had legitimate crap to talk about. "With my brother."

"Saying goodbye?"

"Actually…" Sasuke met his eyes. "I was trying to make things right with him."

All the walls he was trying to erect to shield himself from the blow of Sasuke leaving, suddenly crumbled. He was left unguarded and defenseless in the face of this stunning news. "What…you mean…?"

"Yeah." Sasuke nodded.

"Man. How…how'd it go?"

Sasuke shifted from his stiff posture, and Naruto moved with him. They were thawing from their frozen, tense positions of uncertainty, as their attachment to each other reasserted itself the longer they were reunited. It happened without either of them realizing it. An unconscious thing, something neither had control over, so that they found themselves sitting side by side on the floor, backs against the wall. Sasuke stared at his lap. Naruto stared at his profile.

"Awful. It was awful. Itachi said I had some kind of psychotic break or something. Sedated me. I know I blubbered like a baby, but we talked. A lot. And cried. A lot. It was bad, man. I didn't even know what day it was most of the time. Had no clue so much time had passed, and then when I got here, Iruka said you'd gone off with Neji…" Sasuke turned and looked at him. "Thought you…I thought you…"

"Never," Naruto said. "Just never."

They were silent for a time. Letting their budding fears smooth out on their own. No one had left anyone, the silence said.

"So now what?" Naruto whispered. He was afraid of the answer.

Sasuke smiled. "I'm staying."

For a second, Naruto thought he'd misheard. "In Konoha? For good?"

"Going to try and get into med school," Sasuke nodded.

Naruto pounced. Tackled Sasuke to the floor, all but punching him in his relief and happiness. "Swear it!" he screamed wildly. "Swear it, you ass!" He could barely speak he was laughing so hard.

"I swear." Sasuke's laugh was a rich, throaty sound. Naruto sat up on his waist, but Sasuke lunged up and pulled him in for a kiss. When he released Naruto he said it again. "I swear, I'm staying."

They kissed for a long time, but afterwards they talked again. Or rather Sasuke talked and Naruto listened.

"So…as much as I hate it, if I want to pass my MCATs, I won't be coming over here as much."

"Why?"

"Today I gave my bro an assignment. Find us a new place. Someplace close to the college I plan on enrolling in, and Konoha Hospital. The test won't be for a couple of months, but I'll be studying like a fiend during that time. Did you know that Konoha has the largest medical library of all the neighboring townships? Even Suna?"

"No…"

"Hopefully, Itachi will find a place that's close to it. The library, college, and hospital are all in the same district of downtown. There are suburbs not too far from there. I need to be practically living in that library if I want to pass. I mean, I know I'll pass, but I'm rusty. Anyway, wherever Itachi finds a place for us, it's going to be clear on the other side of town. The time spent commuting from here to the library is time I need to study."

"But-"

"It's only for a little while. The test is in January. I'll come visit on the weekends. Stay over."

"I'm…leaving here in a few weeks."

Sasuke looked down at his hands. "I know."

Naruto waited for Sasuke to say something else. When he didn't, he tried to quell his resentment, and failed. "Didn't know you guys had money for a new place," he muttered.

"Where do you think I've been disappearing to at night? I mean, I hadn't made up my mind for sure to stay or go, but I knew I'd need more cash."

"You were off stealing?"

"Sure was. "Sasuke didn't even pretend to be apologetic. "Nearly got my ass shot off again one night; hit the mother load. Bunch of stoned fucks in a basement, snoozing around two trash bags full of money. I was only able to get away with one, but it was enough."

"Enough?" Naruto's heart was still pounding at the knowledge that Sasuke had been shot at.

"Yeah…"

He watched in wide-eyed awe as Sasuke casually swung his back off his back and unzipped it. Sasuke was speaking, but the words were washing over his ears like so much noise. Sasuke's bag was stuffed with money.

And down in the kitchen, he had to figure Iruka and Hinata looked about as shocked as he felt, as they listened to Sasuke saying he'd made some calls. Seems Sasuke had found that the plot next to the home wasn't for sale, but there was a shut down sports club a couple of blocks over that was. Once renovated, it would be an ideal setup for a group home. Sasuke said he didn't have enough to pay for all of the asking price, but he had more than half. He tipped the contents of the bag onto the table.

"Guy said if you contact him before the end of the week, he'd be willing to negotiate," Sasuke concluded, oblivious to the tears welling in Iruka's eyes, or the fierce pride on Naruto's face. "Think he wants the place off his hands. Did some research, found out that Konoha's charities don't pay property tax on their buildings. The home can easily be considered a charity, right? And there are a few places were you can get the supplies to renovate really cheap. No crew, but if you have the building and supplies, Naruto can do the rest. Right?" He finally glanced up to find Iruka, Hinata, and Naruto lined up by the sink, watching him. "What?"

Iruka and Hinata broke down crying, but Naruto only shook his head at him slowly, as if there were no words to describe Sasuke. "You, that's what," he said.

"You can't do it?"

"Oh, I'm sure I can do it."

"Good." Sasuke shifted uncomfortably. Iruka and Hinata were really howling. "Figured you could be busy doing that while I'm busy studying. We could hook up on the weekends. Rest. Or…whatever."

"You did all this in a day?"

"Few hours, actually. All I did was look in the classified, Christ. Not like I did anything special."

Just then Iruka rounded the table, reaching to pull Sasuke into a hug. Naruto watched as Sasuke tried to tolerate this.

On the one hand, Sasuke had made no comment on the fact that he would be homeless soon. On the other hand, he'd just provided the home's residents with a gift beyond price. He didn't quite know what to think or feel about Sasuke at the moment. A small smile quirked the corner of his mouth as he watched Sasuke forcibly pry Iruka's arms from around his neck. _Nothing special my ass._

* * *

Though the next couple of weeks were fraught with a level of activity and happiness unheard of at the home, Naruto found himself sinking deeper and deeper into some hole he was powerless to climb out of.

The sale on the sport's club had been finalized with money left over to buy a modicum of construction supplies. Iruka had paired all the children up and led them, holding hands, the few blocks to the new facility. A good hour had been spent with the kids running around the spacious ground floor. The enormous swimming pools had been shrieked over, as had the many bathrooms and shower stalls. There was a rock-climbing wall on the lower level too, along with a closed restaurant that sat fifty. Upstairs were several modest offices, and large rooms that had belonged to the various fitness instructors as they gave their classes. Many were mirrored. And then there was what had been the weight room, an expanse of space that still had the rubber mat covering on its floor. Around the entire second floor was a track for those who elected to run indoors. The top floor held, of all things, a basketball court, complete with a huge closet that had equipment for volleyball, badminton, and floor hockey.

The children, not to mention Iruka and Hinata, had all gone berserk.

While they'd been thundering up and down the place, Naruto made a solitary inspection of the club from top to bottom. Beyond a few minor repairs, the place was in excellent condition. Honestly, it was more livable than where they were now.

And he was happy, really he was. He just hadn't thought it would be so hard to live without Sasuke.

To his credit, Sasuke now called the home every evening at 7 pm. Naruto would be waiting by the phone thirty minutes before, and snatch it up on the first ring. There would be twenty or so minutes of conversation- him discussing how the kids were all eager to move right way, or Sasuke talking about postoperative fistulas- before Sasuke would have to get back to studying.

He ached. Sometimes Sasuke would lower his voice on the phone and say how much he missed him. Naruto would do likewise, but he ached. He didn't just miss Sasuke. He missed knowing everything he was doing, every minute of every day. Sasuke now spoke of encountering other people at the library, other people who were also studying for that cat test. He'd talk about study groups, time spent trying to accustom himself to the disagreeable job of appearing normal to people, and Naruto would know sharp, unreasoning jealousy that Sasuke was talking to anyone but him. He liked it better when he knew Sasuke was too fucked up to allow that kind of interaction.

He felt like he was about to run off the side of a mountain. His birthday was around the corner. He'd be cast into the wind soon. Sasuke would get into med school and become completely unavailable. And he, Naruto, would be free falling, with nothing and no one to catch him.

It was impossible not to brace himself for the plunge. He knew Sasuke was trying to maintain their friendship, or whatever it was they had, but that made things worse, if that was possible.

Sasuke did come by on the weekends, just as he promised. For a while, Naruto would be out of the hole. He and Sasuke would laze about the tree house. Sometimes Sasuke treated the new blisters and cuts on his hands from working at the sports club, but most of the time they just sat and talked about their respective plans. The procedures for various surgeries Sasuke would be studying next, or the faulty wiring in one of the offices at the club. There was kissing, but it was different. Sometimes desperate, sometimes reserved and uncomfortable. They couldn't find the balance anymore.

Naruto never asked about Sasuke's new place, and Sasuke never volunteered the information. And so he was left with his slowly hardening feelings, looming fear, and growing confusion. How could Sasuke do so much and yet not do the one thing he wanted him to do? Why did he act like Naruto was important to him, and yet…?

Sometimes Naruto would catch himself staring at Sasuke with something that was almost hatred. Sasuke would see him looking, and look away.

* * *

The day of his birthday, it rained. Naruto stood in the middle of his tree house and looked at his belongings. Thanks to Sasuke, he had quite a few things now. His books had been rescued from the ground, and now sat stacked in piles of ten and bound with strong twine. His clothes were shoved into two huge knapsacks Sasuke had gotten from somewhere.

Typically the first rain of fall meant an end to his nights in the tree house; it was a sturdy structure, but leaky. Tonight, he wouldn't just be moving out of the tree house for a few months, but out of the home entirely. It gave him a fluttery feeling in his stomach.

Iruka was in the kitchen when he went down. It was still early, so most of the other residents were sleeping. "Happy birthday," Iruka said around his mug of coffee.

Naruto surprised himself by bursting into tears.

Iruka's hand landed on the back of his neck, squeezing gently. "I can hire you to work for the home," Iruka said quietly. "I won't really be able to pay you, though. Or you can simply stay with me. I have a nice big room at the club. I'm legally required to turn you out, but I will break any law for you, Naruto. No one has to know you're living there."

As suddenly as they came, Naruto tears vanished on a wave of rage. He pulled away from Iruka. "_No_. I'm done being a charity case. I'll make my own way. With…without anyone's help. When do I have to be out?"

"Naruto-"

"_When?_"

Iruka privately thought that he would never forget the look on Naruto's face just then. The frowning mouth, the violently darkened eyes. "Midnight."

"Fine. The repairs at the club will be done today anyway. Soon as I'm finished I'll come back, get my shit, and be gone."

Naruto slammed out of the kitchen, heading back to his tree house.

-oOo-

Hinata drove him in the home's dilapidated station wagon. Once there, she spent some time making up the beds, and making sure the tables and chairs in the former restaurant were all to her liking. Sasuke had provided the money for the furniture, as well as such things as linens and toys. When Naruto expressed his concerns about him going back to Oto to steal after having been shot at twice, Sasuke snorted. He'd used the last of the money he'd taken the night he'd stabbed that guy, he said. He was officially broke.

Some hours later, the club was done. Ready for habitation. Hinata smiled tremulously as Naruto asked her to take him back for his things.

The ride back was silent. Hinata was a slow driver, carefully observing all traffic rules. Naruto studied the rain-washed streets and wondered what he was supposed to do once the home's door closed behind him. The only place he knew how to get to was the park. Maybe the grocery store. He recalled tales Iruka had told him and the other kids in his youth. Stories about kids wandering away from the home, only to be snatched and sold on the black market as slaves. And that was if they weren't carted off to some dark alley and murdered for the sheer hell of it. Naruto suspected then, as he did now, that the tales were told to keep the more adventurous kids from sneaking out of the home, but the memory of his night in Oto hadn't left him. Predators were real. He didn't want to become some scavenging bum, but what were his options? If only he knew where to _go_.

* * *

The front room of the home was packed. Aside from all the kids shouting "Happy birthday!" at him, Sasuke and Itachi stood in the middle of the room, with Iruka.

Naruto flinched at the shout. "The fuck?"

"Surprise, freak." Sasuke shook his head, grinning. "Thought we forgot?"

"No, but-"

Naruto spluttered to silence as Neji detached himself from a crowd of older kids and came over to him. He held out an oblong box wrapped in brown paper. "I'd love to be friends," he said to Naruto's puzzled expression. "Though I'm still holding out hope for more." His grin was wide and devilish.

Itachi came up on Naruto's other side, looked Neji up and down with flat eyes, then pointedly ignored him. Maneuvering himself between Neji and Naruto, he said, "Sasuke and I –you know, Sasuke your _boyfriend_- have a present for you as well."

Neji raised a brow. "You got beef with me?" he said to Itachi's ponytail.

Before Itachi could answer, Sasuke pulled Naruto aside, leaving his brother to turn and face Neji with whatever smart comment he had ready. "You okay?"

Naruto finally got the brown paper ripped off and found a leather sheath. Inside was a spectacular hunting knife, the edge gleaming in the dim lighting of the home's naked bulbs. "Hoooooooo, _sweet!_" he howled beneath his breath.

"Naruto?" Sasuke said.

"Look at this thing!" Naruto held the blade up in front of Sasuke's face. "Double edged!"

"Naruto."

Raised voices had the kids and Naruto looking over to find Neji and Itachi standing almost nose to nose, jaws tight.

"All I'm saying," Itachi hissed, "is for you to keep your fucking hands off my brother's man. I don't give a fuck _who_ you are."

Neji's reply was an inaudible growl, but Iruka hastily stepped over, hands raised for peace.

"Naruto."

Naruto looked back at Sasuke with a nervous laugh. "The hell's that about?"

Sasuke gave up and dragged Naruto out of the home by the arm. When the door was shut behind them, he forced Naruto to look at him. "Naruto."

"What."

"Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Iruka said you were upset today. And I told you I'd be coming by this afternoon, but you weren't here."

"Had to finish the club before I left. I'm fine." He studied his new knife.

Sasuke pursed his lips. "Itachi and I have a birthday present for you."

Naruto glanced up, then looked back at his knife. A minute later, he lifted his head properly and sighed. "I'm being an asshole. Sorry."

"It's cool."

"It's not. I don't want to stay here, but I don't have anywhere else to go. I'm…" His eyes gauged Sasuke's expression. "I'm scared."

Sasuke looked down and nodded. "I know."

"You do?"

"Yeah. I've been trying to find training programs for you, but they're all full. Jobs are just about non-existent too. I'm working on it, though. And so's Itachi. He just got a new job himself, so he's trying to see if there might be a position for you there. It's not great, but it's better than nothing. Says he doesn't want me stealing anymore."

"Oh." Naruto blinked in shock for a moment. Sasuke _did_ care about him. "You didn't tell me you were doing all that."

"Yeah, well…I didn't want you to feel embarrassed or anything."

"Thanks. I think."

Itachi came out of the home then, face set in grim lines. "I know that asswipe in there thanked you for saving his life and all," he snarled to Sasuke, " but you'd do well to watch your back with him. You ready, Naruto?" Itachi strode past them to what looked like a new Jeep and climbed in.

Once buckled into the back seat with Sasuke, Naruto couldn't help smiling. A little trip was just the thing to take his mind off where'd he'd be after midnight. "Where, um…where we going?"

Itachi braked for a red light and twisted to face him. "Off to give you your birthday present. Once we're done, Sasuke and I will take you home, don't worry."

"Wasn't worried," Naruto said. "But I need to be back by midnight. No hints about the place we're going to?"

"Not a one," Itachi smirked. His eyes met Sasuke's in the rear view mirror for a shared smile. "But I think you'll like it."

* * *

Sasuke distracted Naruto with the information that his studies were positively killing him. "But you're a genius," Naruto laughed. "You know everything about medicine."

"No one anywhere knows all there is to know about medicine. I haven't studied in a long time, and there is tons I don't know. Besides which, medicine is an evolving science, constantly changing. You have to change with it, or risk getting left behind. I'm already behind. Summer school was a cake walk compared to this." He went on in this vein, with Naruto a fascinated listener, until Itachi interrupted him.

"Sasuke tells me you're sporty. What kind of sports you like doing?" he asked Naruto.

"Me? All kinds, I guess."

"Well, you got your contact sports, your non-contact sports," Itachi drawled. "From those, you got your full-contact, semi-contact, limited-contact. You got sports requiring strength, agility, dexterity. Team sports, solo sports. There's-"

"Okay, okay. I, um….guess I don't really know which sports I like since I've never really played any. Basketball? I've done that."

"So you like the _idea_ of sports."

"Yeah, I guess."

"You like moving your body."

"Yeah."

"You're probably frustrated. Confined to that backyard, hence the whole Tarzan thing that Sasuke tells me about."

Naruto didn't know who Tarzan was. A moment later, Itachi parked the Jeep and said they'd arrived. Looking around, Naruto only saw the glass and steel buildings of what he knew to be downtown Konoha. "Where are we?"

Sasuke pointed. Naruto followed his finger until he was facing a huge dome that sat a few blocks away. "That's where we're going," Sasuke said.

"No," Naruto whispered. He took an unsteady step forward. "No _way_. You're kidding!"

"Nope." Itachi came around the front of the jeep, to where Sasuke and Naruto were standing. "You're going to The Arena."

Naruto had heard of it. The Arena was huge. It covered three square miles, and was entirely domed in Plexiglas. Konoha was known for this particular landmark, as it could be seen from virtually anywhere in the city. Walking the short distance to the entrance, Sasuke, Itachi, and Naruto entered its air-conditioned confines and just stared for a moment.

There were two baseball fields, a football field, several basketball courts, volleyball courts, and a racing track. In truth, there were a lot of sports represented that none of them had a name for.

"Fuck!" Naruto whimpered in joy. His eyes were as round as marbles.

Itachi beamed, but Sasuke privately thought that he'd just entered the gateway to hell on earth; he'd had no idea the place would be so…so _energetic_. He reached for one of the thick color brochures stacked beside the door as a guy wearing the blue and yellow T-shirt of Arena employees skipped over to them.

"Hi! First time here?" this man chirped. His smile was twice as wide as any normal person's.

Naruto said that it was, just as Itachi said he'd be back for him and Sasuke in a few hours. He left.

Sasuke read the brochure while absently noting that Naruto and the guy seemed to become immediate best friends. He heard Naruto somehow mentioning that he was a resident of the home, to which sympathetic sounds were made by the guy. Then Naruto said he'd be leaving soon, to which the guy crowed in delight. And then Naruto said it was his birthday, and the guy gave a girlish squeal of congratulations.

"Friend? Friend? _Friend_?"

Sasuke slowly picked his head up and realized the guy was speaking to him.

"I'm going to need to see your tickets, friend."

Itachi had given him the tickets before they'd even arrived at the home. Sasuke fished them out of his pocket and handed them over. The guy, whose name tag read 'Chuck', took them with a broadening of his already unnatural smile and a little bob of his head.

"Alrighty then!" Chuck looked up after inspecting the tickets. "All looks to be in order here. You've purchased five hours of playing time. What would you two like to try first?" His face was nothing short of radiant.

Naruto seemed to be trying to look at all the stations at once. "Everything."

"Excellent!" Chuck turned to Sasuke. "And you, friend?"

Sasuke glanced at Naruto's intent face, then held up the thick brochure.

"Ah, I see you have one!" Chuck announced. "It's pretty long, if I do say so myself. Over 300 activities. I'll understand if you want time to read it before-"

"Already read it."

"So fast?"

"Says in this thing that if anyone here is hurt doing your shit that you people aren't responsible."

"Uh, yes. That's true, but-"

"Well, I'm holding you responsible. Anything happens to Naruto, you'll wish you were dead." He slapped the brochure onto Chuck's chest and pulled a stunned Naruto aside.

"Dude. You don't have to worry," Naruto said awkwardly. His face was bright pink. "I'm not dumb enough to get hurt here."

Sasuke squinted around the noisy place. "Yeah, well if you did get hurt I'll be here to make sure it's not serious. Now, I'm supposed to be all in there with you, but I'd rather be shot, so I'm going to study a bit. Over there on those benches. If your new boyfriend gets curious, tell him I'm checking out one of the other activities. You mind?"

Naruto studied the way Sasuke's eyes seemed to be darting everywhere nervously. Every time there was a shout, or a ball was thrown, his eyes skittered in a new direction. And he hadn't missed the boyfriend comment. It was like some weird change had come over Sasuke the second he'd entered this place. "Does being here make you that uncomfortable?"

"It shows?"

"A bit."

"Can't stand sports of any kind. But I'm here, okay? Unless you really want me in there? With you?"

Naruto grinned. "No, it's cool. This is the best birthday present ever. Thank you." He considered hugging Sasuke, but thought better of it. Later. When they dropped him off home he'd have to say goodbye to Sasuke. He'd hug him then. Sasuke nodded in relief, though, at learning he wouldn't be required to participate in the activities. Naruto watched him walk to the benches near the food court.

Chuck was at his side instantly. "Your friend could do with an attitude adjustment. He is your friend, right?"

"You could say that." Naruto felt a warm weight against his arm and looked down to see Chuck standing very close to him. "Kind of complicated."

"Oh. Well, I don't mind what he said."

"What he said?"

"About me being your boyfriend. You're one cute stud, you know."

In shock, Naruto felt Chuck's sweaty hand worm its way into his own. "Uh…"

"Come on, I'll show you around."

* * *

Itachi pulled up to The Arena's entrance and honked the horn. Sasuke and Naruto came jogging out, with the addition of some round-cheeked teen. Naruto and his brother climbed into the backseat, but this other boy boldly opened the front passenger door and regarded Itachi with shining eyes.

"I've given Naruto some complimentary tickets so you can bring him back every day," the beaming boy gushed. "He _killed_ it in here. Owned every activity station he set foot on. The records he set today, oh my God…" And off he went, recounting things Itachi had obviously missed.

A glance at the rear view mirror showed Sasuke ready for murder, and Naruto trying to hold in a laugh. "Yo," Itachi cut into the boy's rhapsodizing. "Close my door and move."

"Oh. All right…" The boy reluctantly closed the door, but pressed his nose to the window, smudging it. "Will you be bringing-"

Itachi peeled away from the curb, causing the boy to squeal and jump back. Naruto burst out laughing, just as Sasuke rounded on him and started yelling. The noise was deafening.

It was interesting, Itachi thought, seeing all the ways Sasuke interacted with Naruto. The argument was entertaining, to say the least. Especially with Naruto cracking up every time Sasuke cursed. After a minute, Itachi was laughing too.

Naruto used the hem of his shirt to mop his face. "God, I'm starving."

"Burger do you?" Itachi asked.

"Yeah!"

He pointed to the cargo space behind the boys, where a few paper bags of fast food sat. "Surprised you didn't smell it when you got in the truck. Seems like you had fun. Did you?"

"Yeah, I did. That place is amazing, man."

"Glad to hear it. Ready to go home?" Itachi ventured when they'd divided the food amongst themselves.

"Yup. Can't thank you enough, Itachi."

"Ah, don't mention it." Then, because he couldn't resist, he said, "Saw that fool's name tag. Did you fuck Chuck?"

Both boys snorted laughter at that. "No," Naruto gasped. Then he broke out laughing in earnest, nearly choking.

Sasuke was no better; his soda was coming out of his nose, and his eyes were leaking. Obviously, he was over whatever jealousy he'd gotten into the car with. "Seriously," Sasuke wheezed. "He looked like he would have paid you for the privilege, Naruto."

That set Naruto off again. "Not my type."

Itachi noted the look that passed between them. _Looks like Sasuke's your type. _

The laughter died down, to be replaced with the sort of grunting, greedy eating teen boys seemed to be known for. He noticed that Sasuke ate a lot more these days, too. Kid had shot up at least three inches this summer, and packed on a good ten or so pounds of solid meat. He switched to studying Naruto. "You're good people," he told him. "A magnet for boys, but good people. I like you."

Flushed with embarrassment, Naruto tried to speak around the food in his mouth. "Thanks. Like you too."

Itachi turned back to the road, smiling.

* * *

Sasuke distracted him again with gory illustrations and photos in the medical book he'd brought with him, so when Itachi announced that they were back, Naruto looked up in surprise. "We are? That took less time than getting to The Arena. Wait…where are we?"

"Home." Itachi got out, waited until they had followed suit, and beeped the truck locked. He and Sasuke turned and began walking toward a two-story brick house that had carriage lights outside its wide front door.

Looking around, Naruto saw that he was standing in a long, graveled drive that curved up gracefully from the street. There was another house about two hundred yards away on his left, and another couple of houses across the quiet street, also widely spaced apart. The street itself was lined with yellow and orange-leafed trees. Deserted.

He was in a rich neighborhood.

Turning back to the house, he saw Itachi and Sasuke standing there, watching him. "I…don't live here," he stammered. "My stuff's at the home."

Sasuke pushed the house door open, reached in, and retrieved something sitting just inside. It was one of Naruto's packed knapsacks. "What, this stuff? It's here, man. Your books too. You coming in?"

_I'm having a heart attack, _Naruto thought as calmly as he could. His heart was pounding so hard that his vision alternately brightened and dimmed with it. They waited. Eventually he moved toward them, his legs completely unable to bend at the knee. He shuffled in this manner, searching their faces, but their faces were neutral, as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening.

They were only a few dozen feet away, but getting to them seemed to take forever. He had time to notice the black roof. The many windows with warm light shining behind them. The ornamental stone fountain on what looked like a lush lawn. A gazebo in the distance behind the house. Red and purple flowers in large ceramic pots on either side of the white stone walkway that led to the front door. The number on the door itself that read 28. Sasuke holding the door open for him, Itachi already in the house and standing at the foot of a hardwood staircase that led upward.

He was inside. Sasuke immediately shut the door. While he did, Naruto glanced down and saw his stuff sitting neatly next to a coat rack.

"So this is the foyer," Sasuke said matter-of-factly, clapping his hands. "Through here is the dining room. Nice, huh? Got a nice view of the front lawn. Hope you know how to mow that shit, because I don't. And over here is the living room. There's a study in here, where I've put all my med books and junk. Library's down through this hall. And here's the kitchen. Half bath. Full bath. This is the door to the basement. Boiler's down there, with the washer and dryer. I broke the dryer some kind of way, so if you could fix that when you have a chance…okay, now for upstairs. Oh, wait, didn't show you the backyard. Frigging huge, wait till you see it."

Naruto stumbled around, following Sasuke. He knew Itachi was behind him, following as well, but he was too busy trying to breathe, trying to understand the statements of mowing the lawn and fixing the dryer, to ask Itachi what this could all mean. And Sasuke kept right on talking.

"Right so there are four bedrooms total," Sasuke said once they'd reached the second floor. "I already showed you the guest bedroom downstairs. This one is Itachi's. Big and airy. He likes that. Those two down there at the end of the hallway are smaller. Got a bathroom here. There's one in Itachi's room too, but that's his. Said he'd cut my dick off if I used it, so I assume that applies to you too." They all went to the end of the hall, where Sasuke opened what looked like a closet door. Instead of storage space, there was a set of stairs. Sasuke flicked a light switch and began climbing up.

Naruto followed. Heart pounding harder than ever. Hoping, praying, while trying to tell himself to stop praying and hoping. This wasn't happening.

The door at the other end of the narrow staircase was set into the top of the stairwell. Sasuke pushed it up and open, where it flopped against the floor with a muffled thud. He climbed into what looked like a large space. Once Naruto had followed him, he saw that the area was the length of the entire house.

"Looks like two stories from outside in the dark," Sasuke announced. "But it's really two and a half. This is my room. Cool, huh? Way bigger than Itachi's. Best part? Three skylights, look!"

Naruto dutifully looked at the slanted attic ceiling. He looked at everything, from the CD player, to the bookcases, to Sasuke's bed up against one wall on the far side of the converted attic. All things he'd last seen in Sasuke's room at his old apartment.

But then he turned around and saw that there was another bed on the other side of the room. His rug, the one Sasuke had given him for the tree house, sat in front of the large bed. There were two bookcases opposite his bed, his froggy trash can that Sasuke had also brought, and a desk. With a chair. And a lamp. Itachi was just setting his knapsacks down by the foot of his bed when Naruto turned and saw all this. He straightened up, and the wide smile on his face had Naruto shaking his head slowly from side to side. "No," he said. His eyes were blurring, his voice clogged. "_No_." Oh God!

Sasuke came up behind him. "Well, if you really don't like it we can move all your things down to one of the smaller bedrooms, but I thought this would be better. We wouldn't have to be apart anymore."

Naruto whirled around. "_What_ is going _on_?"

The smile on Sasuke's face matched Itachi's. "We said we'd take you home. This is home." But seeing the way the tears filling Naruto's eyes spilled over, and how his breath hitched in and out of him, Sasuke grew serious. "I didn't ask if you wanted to stay with us because I don't always get you. You…get weird over things, and I don't always understand why. Wasn't sure if asking would insult you, or if you'd be happy or not…but-" Sasuke stepped closer, making sure only Naruto could hear him. "But I miss you. I…and you miss me too. We're friends. Did you think I'd let you sleep in the street? I figured I'd bring you here, and you know…just hope you didn't hate me for it. Do you?"

Naruto covered his face with hands. Harsh sounds of crying and muffled speech came from him.

"What?" Sasuke bent to hear.

"I said I'm going to kill you!" Naruto roared, jumping at Sasuke.

Itachi beamed at his brother trying to block the mock punches. He walked closer and waited until Naruto's red-rimmed eyes found him. "I spoke to Iruka this morning while you were at the club. He knows and is fine with it. Happy, even. Sasuke made me wait till today to tell him in case Iruka gave it away before your birthday. For my part, I'm more than happy to have you live with us. Be like having another brother. We're your family now, if you'll have us."

Naruto tried to tackle Itachi as well, but he was a good deal more athletic than Sasuke. Naruto chased him around the entire attic before giving up. "I swear I will fix anything that needs fixing," he panted once they'd come to a stop. "And clean, and-"

Itachi held up a hand. "The fuck you will. That was Sasuke being an ass. Chores will be assigned; we'll each do our part. You want to fix the dryer, be my guest, but I can just as easily call a repairman. You're one of us, not our slave. You don't pay rent here, either in money or services. Okay?"

"I-I-I don't know wh-"

"It's okay," Itachi smiled. He came and patted Naruto's neck. "I wanted to take you when I saw you teaching my brother one night at the home. First time I heard your situation from Iruka. He convinced me that the headache of going through an adoption process was pointless seeing as you'd be out of the home in a few months. Then I wasn't sure if I'd do it, since Sasuke seemed to be leaving. But then he came to his senses- we both did- and bringing you here was one of the first things we discussed. Why don't you get settled in? We'll go over house rules in the morning."

Naruto watched him disappear into the stairwell with a bemused expression on his face.

"Sooo," Sasuke grinned.

Naruto turned to him, then kept turning, looking at every corner of their room. "This can't be real. Is this real?"

"Mhm."

"I'm home? I live _here_?"

"Yup."

"Sasuke…how could you do this for me?"

"How could I not?"

Naruto finally faced him. Looking at Sasuke, all tears gone now, he knew without a doubt that he would kill for him. He would kill for Sasuke. Words failed him then, but he smiled. It was slow at first, but it grew to encompass his whole face.

He had a family. He was home.


	12. Epilogue

A/N: Well...another fic complete! **Greyrocks**, I hope you enjoy. ^^

I want to take the time here to thank everyone for sharing their thoughts. Especially the readers who commented anonymously, or without signing in. I've saved every review, and plan on getting to them eventually, so the ones who do have an account can expect a reply from me soon, hopefully.

*Again, not affiliated with the song in any way.

* * *

Epilogue

The rules, Itachi announced the following morning, were simple. Each of them, himself included, were to follow the posted schedule of chores no matter what studying or work they had to do. Sasuke thought to point out that he was studying too much to do chores, and Naruto was the only one without work, therefore Naruto should be the one to do more chores than anyone else. Besides which, Naruto seemed eager to do them.

To that, Itachi said that Sasuke had lost his ride to the library for a week.

While Sasuke cursed over that, Itachi explained to Naruto that he would be enrolling him in the community college, where they had some remedial classes for him to take. "Not only that," Itachi went on, "Sasuke's had no luck finding job training for you, but I found a construction crew that has a spot available for a trainee. You'd be receiving less than minimum wage, but it's something. If you're interested, I'll speak to the foreman. You can attend the classes at the college in the afternoon or in the evenings."

Naruto listened intently as he learned that the money Sasuke had given his brother to buy the house was mostly gone. There was some set aside for bills, but the rest had to be put towards Sasuke's own schooling. "I won't be tolerating any stealing, either," Itachi said firmly. "We'll all pull our weight, support each other. That shit Sasuke pulled stops now."

"Are we poor?" Naruto asked forthrightly. If they were, it would be a considerable step up from what he'd been at the home.

Sasuke snorted. "No. Itachi's just a complete pussy about money. If you really want to know, my school is taken care of. I have the cost of it covered. The bit I told him to bank for the bills is enough to keep us in comfort for a good year at least. All of us. I'll try and find a job too, if I can. Don't see how, since I'll be in school full-time. You got no need to worry, Naruto. We're fine."

Naruto believed him. But he respected Itachi, so he'd be following the rules to the letter.

* * *

It was like being in some fabulous new world, Naruto thought. His life now was so different from what it had been for 18 years that he couldn't recognize it as life on the world he'd lived in before. He had a bed, space, clothes. People his age and older in the Uchiha brothers, who talked to him and were genuinely interested in hearing what he had to say. There were bathrooms for him to use, that had clear running water. No rusty crap that spurted out of the pipes. Books. Outdoor space to run and flip and jump in.

His neighbors were friendly. The neighborhood was quiet and peaceful, no little kids running and shouting. He'd had no idea how much the noise of the home had bugged him. Sometimes it rained, and he would listen to it hitting the skylights, curled up under his thick comforter, and think he was in heaven.

Itachi was amazing. Strict, but always supportive. Understanding. Naruto had lived the first few weeks in the house nervous to the point of anxiety. Scared he'd do something wrong and make Itachi kick him out. It was only gradually that he was able to relax and really feel like he was at home. Itachi treated him the same way he treated Sasuke, which was to say that he put up with a certain amount of laziness, but had his limits. He had expectations of him and Sasuke and expected the expectations to be met.

Such as them attending classes.

Naruto thought college to be the epitome of all that was good on Earth. There were quite a few adults in there who were worse off than he was. And once his proficiency in math was discovered, he was put into a special program. His instructor there gave the class a project. Something to do with the stock market. When, a month into the class, Naruto came home and announced that he'd quadrupled their savings, there'd been long minutes of stunned silence. Sasuke had been the first to jump and shout. Itachi hadn't been far behind, lifting Naruto off his feet and giving him a bear hug.

Even with these high points, though, his new life took some adjusting to. Mostly it was Sasuke. He had a hard time conforming to rules, and an even harder time pulling his nose out of his books long enough to obey them. Dinner was at seven sharp every night, an affair that required everyone be present. Sasuke hated that. Saturdays were designated as family time. Sasuke hated that too. Naruto sometimes had assignments with his construction crew that ran into overtime, if their employer had put in a rush order. He had a hard time getting away from those in time for dinner, or completing all his homework if he did manage to get away.

Because of all this, Sasuke had the bright idea one night a week into December to skip school. Both of them. Just cut class and work, and take a drive into Suna. They could both use the break, he said, and Itachi was working double shifts at the grocery store.

They actually went to the supermarket Itachi worked at to use the spare set of car keys and take the Jeep. Without Itachi's knowledge. They were on the highway thirty minutes later, windows down, and the frigid air blowing their hair around wildly.

-oOo-

Sasuke led them to an infamous gay club Suna was known for, where Naruto experienced his first taste of alcohol. A glittery, mohawk-wearing male clad in a thong bumped and undulated against him as he and Sasuke danced. Sasuke took exception, but other than that Naruto had a blast. The air inside the club was sweltering hot, the bodies packed in close enough to make turning around an exercise in dexterity. The music beat through the entire structure, and through both boys, as they danced with each other.

The kiss Sasuke planted on him as they fell out of the club sobered Naruto quickly.

It wasn't as if they hadn't been kissing since Naruto left the home, but with Itachi in the house, and all the changes their lives were going through with school, they rarely acted on whatever deeper feelings had developed between them during the summer. Sometimes Naruto thought Sasuke had forgotten about those feelings completely. He was so stressed with studying, and he himself was so tired after work _and_ studying, that sometimes all they did was mumble at each other over dinner, then crawl up to bed.

They hadn't kissed like this since the tree house.

Sasuke's hands dove into Naruto's coat to pull him flush against his body. His breath was hot on Naruto's cheek, his lips hard and bruising. That familiar molten roll of desire uncoiled low down in Naruto's belly, and suddenly the biting temperatures meant nothing. He was hot, so hot, and Sasuke was dragging him into the alley behind the club. Holding him against the brick wall and kissing him furiously the whole time.

They broke apart. Went back for more. Came up for air again, and plunged back in. Again and again, until Naruto's erection became too painful to ignore. Sasuke's zipper pressed against it, making him moan. Shockingly, Sasuke pressed harder, humping against him until Naruto pushed him away and stiffened his elbows to hold him back. "Stop…I can't…I can't."

Sasuke nodded, swiping the back of one shaky hand across his mouth.

It wasn't until the silent ride back home that their minds cleared enough to realize it was two o'clock in the morning. On a school night. Thoughts of Itachi were held at bay by each boy's realization that they could play at being brothers as hard as they wanted, but it changed nothing. Maybe living under the same roof with Itachi treating them as brothers had been awkward for awhile, and their schedules had dampened their natural inclination toward each other for some time. Maybe a lot of things had taken some adapting to. Whatever the case, all of that was stripped away now. Naruto watched Sasuke peering through the windshield at the snow coming down, and knew they would never be brothers.

And when Sasuke put a hand on his leg and squeezed, he knew he wasn't the only one aware of it.

* * *

The cops were at the house. Once they'd left, Itachi turned to their guilty faces, seemed to have some kind of inner debate with himself, then gave in to the urge and slapped each boy across the face. Hard.

"What _the_ _fuck_ is wrong with you two?" he yelled. "Acting like this! Cutting school, taking the Jeep, disappearing to fuck knows where! You're not boys, but you force me to treat you like you are!"

Sasuke glared. Naruto stood at stiff attention, eyes unblinking. "It's not like we were in Oto," Sasuke muttered. "All we did-"

"Where," Itachi said in voice that was nearly inaudible with rage, "do you get the balls to take my fucking truck without a word? To piss off to some club probably crawling with STDs and junkies? All I ask is that you two respect this family. Respect the fact that each of us has been through hell in some way or another, and that we are trying, _as a family, _to have a fresh start. Go to class. Study. Be responsible. That's all I ask of you two, but that's too much, huh?"

Sasuke looked away, finally contrite. Naruto grit his teeth to keep his tears at bay.

Itachi took a deep, calming breath. "You've lost the privilege to ride in my truck. Ever. You each can hoof it to work or school or Hell, for all I care. Give me a fucking stroke, worrying me like this. Well, you know what? Iruka has plenty of room. Told me so himself. Pull this shit again, and you can each move the fuck out."

He stormed out of the foyer, but swung back and slapped them again. When he left, Sasuke and Naruto to stared at each other. Sasuke, for his part, immediately launched into a furious tirade on how they _would_ be better off on their own.

Naruto let him rant, cradling his stinging cheek with a cupped palm. He cherished his slaps. Itachi had been mad at him. Had yelled at him like…like a son. It had been like getting scolded by a parent; Itachi had been worried. He'd only have worried for him if he loved him. That Itachi had given Sasuke the same blows only confirmed the fact that Naruto was well and truly a part of this family. Maybe he didn't feel brotherly toward Sasuke, but Itachi valued him as much as if they _were_ brothers. He was loved. Cherished.

"I'm not breaking anymore rules," he said, cutting into Sasuke's list of Itachi's faults. "Your brother doesn't deserve that."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Sasuke sighed. "But if he hits us again, you and I are going off on him."

Up in their room, Sasuke hesitated at his bed. Naruto caught the silent question in his eyes, but hesitated as well. Some minutes ticked by, with Sasuke across the room, and Naruto watching him. Naruto finally turned on his side and presented Sasuke with his back. Sasuke understood and found his own bed.

* * *

Things settled down into a smooth routine. Itachi, at Naruto's urging, handed over the finances to him. Their savings gradually increased. This allowed Naruto to give up his construction job in order to devote all his time to school. This was good, since the community college offered courses in architecture. He and Sasuke were gone during the day, and home to study at night. Itachi worked his comfortable little job as cashier at the supermarket, took care of the boys, and had no further issues from either of them. The three of them came to terms with their new dynamic, each in his own way, so that they fused into a single unit. One that was able to laugh and talk together, or else have nights of video games, junk food, and bouts of wild laughter. Sasuke grew less resentful of all the family time, and Naruto became less insecure. Sasuke even allowed Itachi to quiz him on his material a few times, after watching the way he tutored Naruto in some of his harder classes.

Seeing them both healing, Itachi breathed an inward sigh of relief. He hadn't been sure the tough love wouldn't push them away.

If he noticed how Naruto and his brother sometimes sat too close, or the furtive looks they gave each other across the dinner table, he made no comment. He expressed neither approval nor disapproval, and neither looked away nor stared whenever he entered a room they were in to find them hastily breaking apart from a kiss. Seemed he accepted whatever they were to each other, since he didn't reject it.

Sasuke just wished Naruto would accept it.

As far as he was concerned, he'd done all he could to earn his trust. He'd stayed in Konoha. Made up with his brother. Kept Naruto from a life on the street. Opted to pursue a career in medicine. And still Naruto rejected him. Oh, he was fine for all the heavy petting in their room, but as always he stopped Sasuke before things could get too far. It was torture.

Several times he wanted to come right out and ask if Naruto loved him. He didn't especially feel the urge to blurt the words himself, though, so he remained silent.

* * *

Christmas was a cheerful mess. It had never really been celebrated by any of them. Consequently, the tree was a lopsided, crazily over-decorated monstrosity. By now their neighbors were aware of the house full of bachelors, and religiously sent over food every week. Especially when it became known how hard all three of them were working. The week leading up to Christmas saw all manner of holiday cookies, cakes, and assorted other desserts flooding their doorstep. Naruto raked in the goods hand over fist, and hoarded what he could on his side of the room. Itachi wisely froze some, but despaired over all the rest that couldn't be eaten. Sasuke muttered about their short-sightedness, loaded the jeep with all the leftover peach cobblers, nutmeg bars, and bread puddings, and drove them over to Iruka's club. Problem solved.

-oOo-

The gifts were lavish. Naruto ran and skidded to a halt on his knees before the tree on Christmas morning, and found himself the proud owner of a laptop. There was also a huge plasma screen television for their room, and a cell phone each. Sasuke had gotten Itachi an antique sword, complete with hand-tooled leather sheath, and a matching dagger. Naruto presented Itachi with plans for an attached garage he wanted to build onto the house.

"I got your gift upstairs," Sasuke told Naruto.

Turned out to be a complete set of books on renaissance architecture. "Oh my God," Naruto breathed, handling the tomes carefully. "Sasuke!"

"I know. I'm awesome." His grin was wicked. "Bet you can't top that."

Naruto snorted. "Close your eyes."

Sasuke did. A large box was placed in his hands. When he opened his eyes, he saw that it was wrapped in shiny red paper and tied with a large silver bow. "What's this?" he smiled.

"Open it." Naruto bit his lip, moving back to sit on his heels while he cradled one of his new books against his chest. "I hope you like it. I got them because I believe in you. You're going to pass that cat test and crush it in med school. You'll be the best fucking doctor ever."

Momentarily stunned by this outpouring of praise, Sasuke blinked and set the box down. After some struggle, he got the lid off, peered inside, frowned…then stared.

Four sets of the highest quality scrubs in blue, black, white, and red, his favorite colors. A handmade leather physician's bag. Two scrub caps with his family symbol hand stitched all over both. A personalized lab coat from the same first rate company that produced the scrubs.

He looked up, then looked away, blinking hard. "You didn't have to do this," he said hoarsely. "This…this is too much. I expected you'd finally cash in your V-card with me or something, not this… This is… Naruto, thank you." He reverently replaced the lid on the box. "I'm not going to touch them. Not even going to breathe on them until I've passed med school." He awkwardly hugged the box. "I think I'm in love."

Naruto cackled at the way Sasuke dropped a passionate kiss on the silver bow. "Dude, what's a V-card?"

"Apparently, something I'll never have from you. Come on. Brother dearest said he wanted us to be at Iruka's by two."

* * *

January dumped so much snow on Konoha that all three of them were forced to spend time shoveling it off the drive and their section of the street. Itachi fit chains on his tires, while Naruto salted the drive and street both. Sasuke collapsed in a snowdrift barely two hours into the work, leaving his brother and Naruto to finish without him.

-oOo-

Inside, over steaming cups of hot chocolate smothered in marshmallows and whipped cream, Naruto asked when Sasuke's exam was.

"Day after tomorrow. Pass the chocolate sauce."

"You ready?" Naruto handed it over.

"As I'll ever be. I'm not opening another book before the exam. Give my poor brain a break."

They were at the island that sat in the middle of the large kitchen, while Itachi ran to the store for supplies. The snow was already coming down again. Itachi would probably be gone for hours, forced to crawl there and back in such weather.

Naruto propped his chin on a hand, using his other to idly turn his mug around on the countertop. He watched Sasuke gingerly sipping from his mug. Saw how whipped cream stuck to his upper lip, and the way he used one thumb to wipe it off. The thumb was sucked clean, before another sip to the mug was given. Overheated suddenly, Naruto dropped his eyes to his own cup, then looked around the kitchen.

His favorite beef stew was cooking in the crockpot, perfuming the entire house with savory smells. The kitchen itself was warm and cozy. Snow was falling in heavy spirals outside the window. The house was empty and silent, but even so he could feel the security here. And it wasn't just the house. It was his family. If the house burned down, he'd still have a home. He'd never be left out in the cold, or abandoned. He had people who would bleed for him. Fight for him. Who loved and worried about him. He was Uzumaki Naruto, orphan no more. He tried just then, but couldn't find a single thing that he was truly afraid of anymore. Nothing more terrifying than his next test loomed on the horizon. He, and consequently his future, was secure.

_I'm safe._

He looked at Sasuke again, really seeing him. He tried to visualize the boy who'd walked into the home one day last June, and couldn't. The blue bangs were gone. The scrappy leanness had been replaced with a healthy physique that was lazy but not weak. Most of the black Sasuke used to wear had been replaced with gray or blue, or sometimes white. The frown that had been etched between those dark eyes more often than not was gone. So were the shifty glances, the constant appraisal of strangers to see if they were potential targets.

Those black eyes glanced up at him, and Naruto felt a sense of unreality wash over him.

"What?" Sasuke said.

"I'm tired from shoveling snow. Need a nap." He went to the sink and washed his mug.

Sasuke just left his in the sink. "Yeah, me too. Think I'll join you."

"You didn't do anything."

"Just standing out in that wind drained me."

"You're a disgrace, you know."

"Aha, but I'm a _smart_ disgrace."

"True."

* * *

At the foot of the stairs, they paused, as was their habit, and looked at each other seriously. A moment later, their daily race to see who could make it to the attic first erupted. Naruto took the stairs three at a time, but was dragged back by Sasuke's hand hooked into the waist of his jeans. He went flying backward, flipping ass over teakettle down the stairs. Sasuke only paused long enough to make sure Naruto was conscious and there was no blood, before haring up the stairs himself.

They got stuck in the doorway to the second stairwell, as usual, but this time Naruto threw an elbow at Sasuke's chest and gained the advantage. He burst up through their door with a breathless whoop of triumph. "I won! Again!"

"Yeah, whatever. Next time I'll drug your cocoa."

"Cheater."

"Freak." Sasuke went to his bed and face-planted.

Naruto turned and closed the door, wiped his sweaty palms down his sweater…then shot the deadbolt home. He needed a moment to get his racing heart under control, but when he straightened and turned around he thought he was as steady as he was going to be.

-oOo-

Sasuke had his head turned away, Naruto saw. He closed his eyes, then took a deep breath and tugged his sweater up over his head. The shirt he had on was next, and then his undershirt. When he was topless and had removed his boots, he stood nervously in his bare feet and licked his lips. "Sasuke."

Sasuke's head turned and settled on his forearms again. "What."

Naruto walked forward a few steps.

"What are you doing?"

In answer, Naruto slowly put his hands on the button of his jeans and undid it. The sound of his zipper being lowered was very loud in the room.

Sasuke slowly turned over and sat up. Naruto had just pushed his jeans down and now stood in his boxer briefs. When he straightened up, gorgeous body gleaming dully, Sasuke felt his mouth go dry. "Dude. Are you sure?" He was sitting tensely on the edge of his bed, heart suddenly galloping.

"Yeah."

"Really? I mean, if you're not ready-"

"Sasuke…" Naruto looked down at his hands, picking his nails nervously. "I'm ready. I wasn't for a long time, but… You know, it's weird. At the home, you get so you don't want things. You teach yourself not to want things early on. It's a hard lesson, but once it's learned it's almost impossible to _un_learn. And nothing ever sticks. On the rare occasion that something good happens, it never sticks. Never lasts. Everything about the home is temporary. The hand-me-down clothes are temporary. The cookies some old lady donated are temporary. The kids are temporary, if they get placed. Your own life there is temporary, so yeah nothing sticks.

"But then you came along. Walked right in off the street, pointed a finger at me, and chose me. And you've been sticking ever since. Am I sure about this? Yes, I'm sure. Finally sure. I'm scared of wanting you, but…I'm never going to feel like this for anyone else. Even if someone else came along, you know, if something happened and I was with someone else…they'll never be you. You…you gave me everything. Gave me your secrets. Your trust. Your help. Yourself. You gave me a dream. A life. _This_ life. No one's ever going to be able to give me those things because you already did. No one's ever going to be in me the way you are. In my blood. I'm full of you, there's no room for anyone else. So…yeah. I'm ready. You can't keep giving me everything. One of these days I'm going to have to admit to wanting something, and reach for it. And I want you, Sasuke." He peeked at Sasuke's face. Biting his lip, he lifted his hand to point at him. "I want _you_."

Sasuke seemed to rise off his bed without conscious thought, and float across the room. He stopped when he was directly in front of Naruto. They were eye to eye, evenly matched. "Do you know why I love you?" he asked quietly.

Naruto mutely shook his head, throat working over hearing those words.

"Because you don't break. I'm clumsy. With people, I mean. I say stuff, do stuff. I hurt you." He lifted a hand to touch the place on Naruto's neck that he'd cut a few months ago. "And I'll probably hurt you again at some point. Maybe not like that, but I will. I'm just not great with the whole feelings thing. But you're unbreakable. No matter what I do or say I did, you're there. I can be myself and you won't break from how damaged I am. You really sure about this?"

Touched, Naruto nodded. "Yeah."

"Okay."

That was it for a while. Their foreheads met and rested against each other. They stayed that way until Naruto's hands drifted up to the hem of Sasuke's hoodie and began slowly pushing it up. Sasuke let himself be undressed to his own boxer briefs, before they stepped to each other again and put their heads together. It was a comfortable position, one that was intimate without being too much so.

Their noses rubbed alongside each other for a time. Teasing. Lighthearted yet serious. It was Naruto who closed his eyes and slanted his head first, pressing a soft-lipped kiss against Sasuke's mouth. He held there, feeling Sasuke's breath on his cheek, until they pulled back enough to part their lips and take it deeper.

Maybe it was the knowledge that this was it, that things would go a lot farther tonight. Or maybe it was the way Naruto pushed his hands through Sasuke's hair, or the way Sasuke lightly raked his nails down the muscles of Naruto's back to cup his ass. Whatever the reason, the kiss turned hot and humid and demanding. That threshold came hurtling up, the one they'd always stopped at before. And they stopped this time too, stepping back from each other.

Sasuke dropped his briefs. Naruto followed suit.

Naruto only felt a moment of shame. A brief sting of self-consciousness. Sasuke's cock stood like a fist thrust up in defiance. Naruto was suddenly awkward, but Sasuke was there, closing the distance between them.

It never ceased to amaze him how different Sasuke was whenever they touched. The habitual laziness was replaced by a demeanor that was almost stern in its intensity; Sasuke knew what he wanted and took it.

He wasn't overbearing, but his hands didn't hesitate in running over Naruto's shoulders, up the sides of his neck to pull him in for a tight, hard kiss. Their nudity, the warm and silken glide of Sasuke's skin on his left him weak to his advances. Naruto's head went back, cradled in the crook of Sasuke's elbow as hot lips moved down the side of his jaw. He felt teeth graze his neck. A warm tongue touched the lobe of his ear, making him shiver. There were murmurs. His name whispered.

A hot, strong hand sliding over his stomach to cup him firmly.

He froze. The lips at his ear were whispering, soothing him even as that hand shifted and closed around his rock-hard length. It squeezed, and Naruto's hands came up suddenly to land on Sasuke's chest, ready to push him away.

Sasuke helped him. Held him. Kissed him. Only when he was kissing him back did that hand squeeze again, milking him in slow, firm contractions that had his teeth bared.

"Naruto…"

"Huh."

"I've never done it with someone inexperienced." That hand never stopped moving, massaging and twisting.

"I don't really care what happens, Sasuke. Just touch me. Don't stop touching me."

-oOo-

Somehow they made it to the bed. It was a while before the nerves completely left them. Before Sasuke grew confident enough in his limitations to cover Naruto's body with his own and trail kisses down his chest. He touched every part of Naruto, kneading, rubbing, learning, until Naruto grabbed his hand and brought it lower once more. He found him hot and swollen, and then it was Naruto rolling him to his back. Naruto who rubbed his face all over Sasuke, nearly insatiable in his curiosity. His handling of Sasuke's cock was tentative at first. This was new territory for both of them but he let the velvety shaft bob against his face as he nuzzled Sasuke's balls and nosed into the crack of his ass.

Sasuke let him. He lay still while he was made to turn onto his stomach. Naruto kissed a path over his ass cheeks, up his back, along the back of his shoulder until he laid full length on him.

This went on, with them exploring each other, growing comfortable with this level of intimacy, until the caresses became urgent. The nerves became excitement. Panting. Grabbing hands, bitten flesh, throaty moans. Finally, Sasuke was unable to hold back another second. He pushed Naruto's thigh's wide and swallowed him whole.

Naruto yelled lustily.

They went still. Naruto had to clench his teeth, eyes glazed at the unbelievable feel of his cock in the scorching cavern of Sasuke's mouth.

Sasuke released him long enough to reach over the side of his bed and snatch the remote for his CD player off his nightstand. He hadn't listened to any music since the first time he'd kissed Naruto. When he and his brother moved, he'd simply packed the CD player as it was, and unpacked it in the same condition. Consequently, what came roaring out of the speakers was Chumbawumba at full volume.

Naruto managed a weak laugh. Sasuke's head bent to him again, and the laugh became a series of groaning curses and shouts of Sasuke's name that were completely masked by the music.

Oddly enough, the music loosened whatever inhibitions they hadn't yet released. Sasuke, though conscious of the gift he was being given, played with Naruto. Goaded him into voicing what he wanted, how he wanted to be touched, or what felt good. There was laughter. Some screams of mirth as they rolled and horsed around on the bed. Then Sasuke sucked two fingers and slid them into Naruto, pressing them deep, and that silenced the laughter.

Naruto arched, mouth working soundlessly as Sasuke manipulated his fingers in such a way as to have him seeing stars. He grabbed Sasuke's shoulder in one hand, hanging on as his cock began leaking profusely. Almost without his volition, his other hand wrapped around it, stroking as Sasuke worked his fingers, as his body continued to arch off the mattress, as he came in an explosive rush that him yelling all over again.

This time when Sasuke covered him with his body there was a gravity to his features that had Naruto gazing at him seriously in turn. They were ready; Sasuke had put on a condom only moments before, and now braced his weight on his forearms. He looked down at Naruto. The music continued to blast around them.

"Stay with me," Sasuke whispered.

"I am with you," Naruto smiled. He ran the back of one hand over Sasuke's cheek. "I don't want anyone else."

"No…stay _with_ me."

Naruto frowned. "I _am_…I live here."

"_Stay with me_."

Oh. Sasuke meant…"Forever?"

"Please."

Their eyes held for a long time. Sasuke looked away first, embarrassed, but Naruto held his face and forced him to look back. "I thought you'd never ask."

Sasuke's smile was blinding. Naruto was still reacting to it, and to the request itself, when the hard, thick penetration of Sasuke's body into to his had him catching his breath. His heart rate had yet to calm down from before; the tight squeeze of Sasuke cock in him had it doubling its speed all over again. Sasuke didn't hold back either, leaning forward until he was sheathed to the hilt and Naruto lay quivering beneath him. Face contorted in a mixture of pleasure and pain, Naruto instinctively lifted his knees, intensifying both sensations immeasurably.

The music rose and fell, pulsing and throbbing in time to the bruising pace Sasuke set. Any thoughts of taking it slow for Naruto's first time were done away with by Naruto himself. He sank his nails into the flexing muscles of Sasuke's ass and refused to let go, yanking him inward, doubling the impact of each thrust as he did. He was hungry for Sasuke and not afraid to show it now. Sasuke couldn't ay he was any better. The validation of Naruto expressing his desire for him at last, both verbally and physically was like the final puzzle piece of his shattered life being fitted into place. He was hungry too. Starving. Ravenous. Mad for Naruto and completely unable to check his trusts, even if Naruto had asked him to.

The grunts and growls, cries and moans, were all drowned in the music. Even when Sasuke flipped Naruto to his stomach, straddled his ass and fucked him that way, Naruto's cursing demands for harder and faster were only a small part of the cacophony of lust and sound around them. Sasuke leaned his hands on Naruto's shoulder blades and hammered him mercilessly, all the months without sex finally catching up to him. He had to work to hold Naruto's strong, bucking body down, but found that he was up to the task. In more ways than one. At the moment of his release, he sank his hand into Naruto's hair, holding him still as he churned out several brutally hard thrusts that shook the entire bed. Naruto rode out the assault with a yell he buried in the pillow, hands twisted in the bed sheets even as he begged Sasuke not to stop.

The song's strains seemed to die away just as Sasuke rolled to his back with a groan of exhaustion. It was a few seconds before the song would play again. During that tiny period of silence he could feel his body coming down from its excitement. Shutting down, preparing to sleep. He was so comfortable. So unutterably spent and comfortable…

"Again."

Naruto landed on him, mouth already latching onto his neck, and Sasuke felt a second wind rousing him from oblivion. Chuckling tiredly, he rolled with Naruto and pulled the blanket over their heads.

The song started up again, thudding through the two young men, who moved to it in their own way.

* * *

It was a song that that was heard often in the house after that. Every night, in fact. Once the dinner dishes were cleared, Sasuke would put the CD in and hit replay. Itachi would join him and Naruto, ponytail swinging, as they all danced and whooped as only family could.


End file.
